GUYS, would you be interested in a girl that use to be obese but lost a lot of weight?

I am 5'6" and at my heaviest I weighed 330 pounds. I had some bad stuff happen to me when I was younger and I turned to food to deal with my depression. Eventually the light bulb went off in my head that I did not want to be this depressed and obese any longer and through diet and exercise alone lost 150 pounds.

Now I am at 180 pounds and wear a size L in tops and size 12 in jeans/pants. I look and feel great when I am wearing clothes. But I am still EXTREMELY self conscious when I am naked and have avoided being intimate with anyone because of skin issues.

My arms actually are OK, but I have BIG sagging droopy boobs. I still have a lot of belly fat. And my thighs are a mess.

I want surgery but can't afford that now. So I wanted to ask the GUYS on here especially, would you be interested romantically in a girl that use to be obese, lost all the weight and works out regularly now, but still has skin/body issues underneath the clothes? Or do you think you would be too repulsed to even consider her?

Speak truthfully now! :)


Most Helpful Guy

  • Probably yes. But as much as people like to say "it is what is on the inside that counts.." there has to be physical attraction. So you cannot make a blanket statement of "would you date..." because it depends on the girl. But it depends on the girl even if she was always skinny.
    Most of us are not skinny people. Especially guys. Most of us guys have a stomach on us. But it has been there my whole life and I know it will never be going away. So either she likes me or she doesn't. I have no control over that.

    • Well just from my experience, guys TEND to be a little more focused on looks then girls. (Don't get me wrong, women would love to have a hot looking guy any day of the week, but we seem to focus on other things beyond looks. Guys just seem more like visual creatures! :) ) I guess what I am trying to figure out is if you met a girl, got to know her some and had a great time with her - good personality, good chemistry, she made you feel comfortable, etc. But when you decided to be intimate with her and if it wasn't found out beforehand that she used to be obese, but you can see that she has some skin issues from being fat at one time, would that be a deal breaker for you? Could you be intimate with her or would that kill the mood and stop any chances of continuing to date her? (Maybe still be friends but that is it)

    • as long as I was attracted to her then there would not be an issue. body issues can be over looked. It is not like sex will feel different because of extra skin on her arms or stomach ;) It would not be a mood killer at all.

    • True, but I guess I was thinking just from the visual aspect of it. Thighs are the worse but I do want to get surgery in 2015. That being said I don't want to wait a whole year to start dating again and the like. :)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 7

  • First off, Congratulations! I know how hard it is because I too went from 275 to 180. it wasn't easy but its worth it.

    Second, Yes many men would date you for two reasons. 1) you are healthy and probably more fit. 2) That takes a lot of willpower and dedication to overcome a goal like that.

    So if a guy would say no to a girl like you isn't worth your time and effort.

    • Thanks! And congrats on your own weight loss as well! Definitely not an easy task to go through, but you are right that it is worth it at the end.

      Yes I am definitely leaps and bounds healthier than I use to be. For example I jog on the treadmill now, and back then I would get winded going from my desk to the bathroom down the hall.

      And thank you. I wish ALL guys thought more like you!

  • Honestly, if you ask a question like that on a website like this you will get men saying they don't like it. The thing is it's your body. It's the only body you will ever have. You need to learn how to love it or your life will be a misery.

    If you want a man then go and get one, if he rejects you because of some extra skin, I mean seriously. Go and get another man who loves you for you, not some bits of skin.

    • I understand. But because I have not dated in several years now I really am clueless as to what to expect. I mean I guess what I am trying to figure out would be if most guys would be turned off by it even if they thought the girl had an amazing personality and there seemed to be some chemistry there, would seeing some excess skin and a "way less than perfect" body be a mood killer? Or would most guys not care, especially if they know the girl is someone that works out a lot and takes care of herself now.

    • That's what I'm trying to say Asker. Some men are superficial, I'm sure you've seen those stupid stickers such as "no fat chicks" and that kind of rubbish. If you get sexual with a man you don't know very well then, well, it's always a possibility. Protect yourself.

      There are men out there who place a high value on a partner and want chemistry, personality, a warm heart, and can easily see past some minor physical imperfections.

      How about the hard work and motivation that went into losing all of that weight!

  • Good job first of all. I wouldn't care about your body in the past that much, if you work out and weigh 180 pounds, it can't be that bad right now, can it?

    • Wellllll... I am a lot healthier than I was at my highest. And when I wear clothes you can't tell. But when I am naked it shows that I was heavier. Too much loose skin around the stomach/thigh area. And the boobs aren't perky. Luckily the arm area isn't bad at all. But you can tell I was a lot heavier at one point in time. Hence my reason for asking the guys on here especially what their thoughts are if they met a girl like that.

    • It's just some loose skin in the belly area and the boobs' little problem is unnoticeable with a bra, so that's not a turn off, don't worry.

  • I wouldn't even know.

    • What makes you say that? Just curious!

    • Show All
    • yeah but i think it would be obvious when the clothes came off, lol.

    • I wouldn't know, personally. It may. If it is then I guess I'd care but I doubt it would override emotional involvement.

      You accept the things about the people you love, it's part of the package.

  • No. I'm looking for 5'6" 110 lbs, no history of messiness.

    • Thank you for being honest, although I am not sure putting it as "no history of messiness" was the kindest way to put that either. :/

    • Not everyone will be like me, but I'm not the average web junkie.

  • Great job losing the weight

    • Thank you! Would still like to drop another 10 or so, but I am quite happy with where I am now. :)

    • Good luck you can do it

  • I would be afraid of those habits returning, bringing back the weight. It's the weight that seems - when older - to limit activities and options, tire more easily, etc. that I fear as much as aesthetics b/c after work, it's more fun to do things opposite of sitting at work all day.
    So, for guys like me, keep your history private and consider this the first day of the rest of your life. Strike those fat memories & details from your memory.

    • I won't lie. It is going to be a lifelong struggle but my mindset is different now then it was back then. And in a perfect world I would love to keep my "fat past" hidden, it would be obvious to a guy once the clothes come off that I use to be fatter. So the boobs aren't perky and the tummy and thighs jiggle more than they should. Argh!

    • Good for you!!! Be proud of getting yourself healthy!

What Girls Said 2

  • wow I just want to say kudus to you for losing so much weight, that is quite a lot of weight you have lost!

    • Thanks! It is... like I lost an entire person! (Kind of scary to think about as well that I used to be THAT heavy too, eeep!)

    • hat is amazing its so hard for me to lose weight because I love to eat, it takes so much willpower. Congratulations :)

  • Wow, I'm proud of you. You took action and lost a lot of weight through exercise. Don;t stop. Exercise helps with depression as well :) And any guy would be lucky to have you