How to bounce back from getting poor grades?

I used to be a straight A's kid until anxiety hit me and I became suicidal. I started skipping classes a lot. Initially I tried not to do it but I'd start tearing up in the class and went to the restroom and cried and eventually I started crying in class every single day because it felt like hell. I used to get very frequent mental breakdowns and so I started skipping classes and just keep myself locked up in my room because I didn't wanna embarrass myself by breaking down in front of my classmates. The more students there are in a class, the more I feel like hiding away.

I was seeing a counselor but something happened and I'm not sure if I wanna go anymore. Today my A level (A. S.) results came out and it's terribly disappointing, people who didn't realize what state I'm in are finally commenting that I really am not okay if THAT'S how I performed.

My anxietyh only been worsening but I really wanna bounce back from this state. But I'm kinda feeling overwhelmed and I have no idea how to recover from this, especially when I'm not getting much help in terms of mental therapy. But I need to recover my grades and be the person that I always wanted to be from a young age. I know it's possible, but I have no idea where to begin.
How to bounce back from getting poor grades?
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