Do you want your children to look physically similar to you (in terms of general Phenotype)?



My mother is seriously not racist but she has always told me that it’s better if my kids look similar to me, so it’s better if I marry someone who shares a similar phenotype.

At first, I didn’t really listen, but as I got older, I kind of feel the same now. I think it’s cute to have similar looking children.

And I also realized that every single man I really liked in my life comes from one of the Mediterranean countries, and has a stereotypical Mediterranean look (like my current italian guy) meaning I usually knew they came from that region but couldn’t pinpoint which country exactly (dark hair, golden skin, Caucasian facial bone structure, soft hair (not kinky) but not necessarily straight).

It’s not really an ethnical or racial thing, but mostly a phenotypical thing. For example, I would rather not be with a fellow Tunisian who is too Light or too dark to pass as Mediterranean, or with an Italian who is too light that you can’t really tell he is from the Mediterranean.


NB: In case you still didn't notice, I'm not asking about RACE or ETHNICITY, but about PHENOTYPE.



  • Yes, and I want my future spouse to have a close phenotype so it can happen
    Vote A
  • Yes, but I don’t believe that I necessarily need to be with a spouse who shares a similar phenotype to have children who resemble me
    Vote B
  • Not necessarily, it doesn’t matter whether they look similar or not
    Vote C
  • I don't want my children to look physically similar to me
    Vote D
  • I don’t want children
    Vote E
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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1530

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 30

  • If my kids are happy and healthy, it doesn't really matter to me what they look like.

    For their sake, I hope they look like their mother though :)

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  • My ex mentioned this, and every ounce of petty in me hopes she ends up with a look-a-like blonde and green eyes male and they produce brunette or ginger haired brown eyed kids who look nothing like either.
    Not because I don't like her (I do), not because this is not how genetics work, not even because people describe this just as some cute desire when really they go out of their way to make this happen, but because it sounds like closeted xenophobia

    So I guess no, them being healthy and happy is more important than me trying to clone myself

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    • How is it xenophobia if it's not focused specifically on race or ethnicity?

  • Ya of course as you grew older you kinda agree but isn't that a bit much lol
    You're like a princess with very specific requirements lol

    Too many barriers makes for a meh journey. Sometimes taking too many pictures on a vacation takes away from the magic

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  • I am only attracted to women with almond shaped eyes. Sometimes this means I date Asian girls and latinas that have particularly almond shaped eyes, but there are also white girls with almond shaped eyes, and I have dated some of them. Skin color isn't important to me, and although I prefer thin women and petite frames are always good, body shapes and sizes are less important than almond eyes.

    I don't know if I would say I have almond shaped eyes, though. I don't really know how to describe my eyes, except to say that they're blue on the outside edge and green on the inside nearest the pupil. I honestly don't know how to describe the shape of my eyes, and I've never heard anyone else tell me what shape they look like. So, I can't say whether or not I want to be with a girl that looks like me, since I don't have a good grasp of what I look like.

    That being said, phenotype really isn't important. According to 23andme and family genealogy I'm Irish, Scottish, Breton, Welsh, French/German, Scandinavian, Italian/Greek, and Native American, so I'm pretty mixed as it is.

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  • Of course I desire that my future wife and children share a similar phenotype. I have pride and love in my own.

    Why would I desire for my wife or children to not look like me or any of my relatives?

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  • It doesn't/didn't matter that my daughter looks like her mother because she's got so many of my traits, smarts, sense of humor, dedication etc... I take great pride and joy when I see the type of woman my daughter has become. Looks really aren't everything when you have the common decency, empathy and knowledge of right and wrong to excel in this world.

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  • i am pretty sure, a black, white, Caucasian, Hispanic all this infants will poop and all their poop will stink! so basically i don't see the difference..
    i ampretty capable of taking care and loving kids. . irrespective of the fact if they are mine, or someone else's or adopted.. this are just stupid term..
    i basically see a human race, and it needs a better direction then its habits and amazing ability of self destruction

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  • Sure makes sense i guess. would you ever get a dna test? You have a light complexion yourself to me you dont look Mediterranean.

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    • What do I look like then haha
      Actually yeah, I'm getting my results in a little over a month! :)

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    • Haha thanks!
      Is your friend Portuguese?

    • Yea he is, he didn't know about the other results though

  • Yes.

    And that is almost a guarantee anyway as my families genetics on my fathers side are incredibly strong. So there is a high chance that will be the case. Of course I want them to look like their mother as well.

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  • Life in general is a struggle regardless of what you look like. having kids that appear similar to me won't help them because looking like me hasn't helped me.

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  • If my kids are happy and healthy, it doesn't really matter to me what they look like.

    For their sake, I seriously hope they look like their mother though 😊

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  • Lol all I want is for them to be more attractive than I.

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  • I think for me the most important thing is that she is Caucasian. Blonde, ginger, black, brunette all don't really matter to me. As long as my offspring has a chance of resembling me with a white complexion. A ginger version of me would be pretty funny though. Little Ed Sheerans...

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  • Honestly, finding someone who is honest, has good character, values and worthy of a relationship is so fucking hard nowadays that I dont even care about this.

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  • I don't care.

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  • Geez, I want my children to be as different from me as they can! I don't hate them, I don't want to put a curse on them!

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  • It doesn't matter to me at all what my kids may look like. I just hope they will grow up to become decent human beings and have good character. Phenotypes are irrelevant.

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  • I spend zero time thinking about this, but hey, you do you.

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  • It doesn't matter

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  • It doesn't matter really. But I'd be sad if someone asked me if they were my biological kids.

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  • I care about my kids being smart, healthy and me and my wife being married for as long as the kids are in the house. Race and skin color mean literally nothing to me.

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  • For me, I want to my kids to have my athleticism and love for Christ.

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  • I don't give a fuck

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  • you look so beautiful, girl:))

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  • i pray to god my kids not to look like me :( :p :p :)

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  • I don't care really

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  • I am just naturally attracted to girls with eastern European features that are similar to mine. It just happens that way for me.

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    • Totally get it, since i'm the same.
      Are you eastern European or do you just happen to share similar feautures with Eastern Europeans?

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    • Yeah haha the guy I'm with is not even from the same ethnicity. He's Italian/European and I'm Tunisian/ North African , we just happen to look overall similar.

    • I doubt Italians and Tunisians have terribly different genes

  • Yes I went my offspring to look like me

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  • i hope they do then i won't have doubts about whether or not theyre my kids <3

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  • I want kids with a white girl. I hope they'll look more like their mom.

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What Girls Said 15

  • You don't have to be with someone who looks similar to you for your kids to look like you... that's not how genetics work.

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    • Don't get me wrong similarities will increase your chances of similar kids but not necessary.

  • Only racists think this way. You don't need to reproduce with someone who looks like you to have children who will look like you. Take a class on genetics. I look like both of my parents and they're both different races.

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    • This is why I stressed the "In terms of General Phenotype"
      If a white blonde haired, blue eyed woman makes a baby with a black man, it's possible, but statistically unlikely that the kids will have blue eyes and blonde hair.

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    • Like I said, a racial preference cannot exist without some type of racism being present. Whether you choose to take it as a good thing or a bad thing is up to you, but racial preferences are racist.

    • @ElissaDido: You won this dabate. Lol

  • Nah, I don't care about tht stuff. I mean, it'd be nice if they did have at least a couple of my traits mixed with a couple of my partner's but it wouldn't be upsetting or bother me if they didn't look like me.

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  • Mine don’t look like me. They have brown eyes and brown/black hair. I have green eyes and reddish hair.

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  • No Bc I'm ugly as hell lol

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  • I don't care if my children look nothing like me. They'll still be my kids.

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  • My daughter is like a clone of me and I feel kinda bad for her. Like not that she got bad genes and I’m unattractive but in the fact that literally everyone we have a conversation with ever always points out how much we look alike, and that will go on the rest of her life. My mom and myself look exactly alike, so I got annoyed being constantly told I look like my mother, even responding to her name. I don’t want my daughter to get used to responding to my name.

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  • Doesn't matter

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  • I really don't care

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  • Not really. Maybe curly hair, big eyes, and skin tone, but I'm so unattractive that I don't want to bestow that upon them.

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  • idc. As long as they don't look like Freddy Kruger I think I'd be good.

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  • I don't care boo. Kids are kids regardless

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  • no. and i don;t want them to have my weird genes. i suffered enough, they don't need to

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  • C for coincidentally, just the other day, was wondering if you had deactivated. haha

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  • My parents look really different, my dad has tanned skin my mom has really light skin, dad has black hair, mom has blonde, etc., yet I look just like my mom, and she looks young enough to pass as my sister

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