You just think us depressed people are just so weak. When in reality, the ones that keep going and don't off themselves immediately are the strongest of them all. Well. You can only be strong enough so long before you crumble down. You people who mock the depressed and tell them to get over it and just call them weak and crybabies can go fuck yourselves. I'm tired of this shit. You think any of us who are depressed WANT this? No we sure as hell don't. Anyway, now all of you, my family, friends, people I've met along the way, and people who just randomly added me know who the real me is. What's really going on inside. I'm quiet and I just can't take it anymore living this life like everything is okay. I don't care anymore. I just want it to all go away. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemies. I really wouldn't. I CAN'T handle it anymore. I have tried everything, medicine, counseling, trying to think positive thoughts. Nothing is doing anything. And I'm pretty sure nothing ever will. It really is survival of the fittest in this world. And guys like me, just don't belong. Some of you people say just do this, do that, get over it, stop crying about it, boohoo, you're pathetic. You wouldn't last a second with anyone not showing you any kind of attention. Anyway. This is it. Friends, family, I love you, all of you, I really do, I wish you the best and hope you never feel the way I do, and now you know, how I really feel. This is not a cry for attention, or pity me, this is a cry for help, with the only positive ounce I have left in me to get better and not end it all, like I wish I could, but can't bring myself to do. But tonight. I want to. So if this is my last message, I'm sorry everyone if it's selfish, I'm sorry I kept this hidden from you and let it blow up out of proportion like this. Forgive me I know I'm messed up in the head, and I'm finally admitting it. I don't care. Nothing or no-one can make me feel any worse than this.
I am blessed, I have food, make enough, have a roof, but I would settle for so much less, to not be lonely anymore, to living homeless if it meant being beside my true love. But the world doesn't work like that. Here it is folks. The sad reality."