Why is my mom so mean to me?

My mom seems so miserable in her marriage. Ever since I left home she’s made me feel punished for it. She said I would never lose my baby weight and I have now she makes out I am ill for being healthy.

When they have family meet ups and I don’t make it due to schedule she will send me videos like I am missing out etc. She says I am too focused on my son and partner but they are obviously most important people in my life.

She purposely mentions when they went for meal recently for my brothers girlfriends birthday letting me know I wasn’t invited like she enjoyed making me feel excluded. She says I need my partner out my life.

Always mentions the past about me being at home it’s been 4 years and on Saturday she was talking about it. I nearly died in pregnancy in a discussion I said but I made it and she said just. An I was like wow you would wish me dead. She didn’t respond.

She even trash talks my son saying he’s gonna look so much cuter when his hairs done. Her husband doesn’t take her out or doing anything with her but that’s not my problem she chose her partner.

She likes the idea of me being a single mom which is odd like who would glamorise that. Also she compares me to my sister saying look at your sister she has a degree but I went uni but it wasn’t for me. Found this hurtful.
She made out my eczema was a result of stress from relationship when it’s been there since I gave birth in 2017. She tells me to shave my sons head but I said we don’t want to it’s up to us. She even said oh you didn’t drink your alcohol I said I don’t drink anymore not used to it I had two sips. She said are you scared to I was like huh.

I changed my lifestyle and drink herbal teas and water and she tries to give me bad food.
She has high bp but still isn’t doing anything to help it I have tried with her. I have always been the fat one now I am the skinny one they hate it and say oh she only eats salads. Which isn’t true that’s not a balanced diet.
Why is my mom so mean to me?
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