My stepsister is turning 17 soon and she's planning on having a big extravagant birthday, renting a hall, having a $200 cake, a DJ, wearing a nice dress. She doesn't have the money enough money to pay for it all and she's going to try to milk money from everyone else, and I'm not going. I hate being the center of attention, since I've become an adult my birthdays is Chinese food, cheesecake, 2 cigars, and a bottle of whiskey and the only gift I want from the world is to leave me alone. The only exception I'm willing to make is with my SO if I have one. Most of my birthdays have been anything but happy in the past, my Papa had a heart attack on my 7th birthday, the substitute teacher gave me detention on my 8th, and my ex stepgrandmother dies on my 12th. I've had multiple birthday "parties" but it was really just people coming over to smoke pot with my parents and not even care about me and I didn't have friends when I was a child. I preferred to stay home from school for my birthday, but one year my mom forced me to go because she wanted my name to be on the sign in front of the school, I guess my birthday is centered around what other people want, oh fuck her anyways. I have to smoke a cigarette just to even visit those memories. Some people want the world to kneel before them on their birthdays and I just want the world to let me eat, drink, and smoke in peace.
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