Im in a dilema about the Covid virus and the upcoming holidays gatherings, What do you think?

Question

And are you feeling the same iwith your love ones?

I have a married sister who lives in her house. I live with my mom, my brother. My mom is a seniro citzen but so far she is in somewhat good health. The only high risk factor for my mom and the virus is the age. Since this virus started in my country in March, of course there had been deaths, , people infected, people in ICU now and the hospitals are starting to crowded with hospitalizations and patients in ICU starting to rise. Also where I live business are re-opened again cause economy needs to lift progressively and people need to earn money to get food to their homes. Most business where I live has to follow all hygiene protocols for the customers: having sanitzing in the stores, customers keeping distancing from each other, only are able to operate with 50% of customers, precisely to prevent crowds in their places and all customers have to wear mask, even restaurants has to work that way now, the new normalcy everywhere.

My mom has not been going out like to crowded places of course to prevent her getting infected for her age, she had been at home, most of the time and if she goes out is with my brother and myself to distract her a little but she always stays in the car. The ones running home errands and so stuff in stores, markets etc is my brother and myself. Of course we both follow the protocols, we wear masks when going outside, we carry our own sanitzing , we try to keep distance when whe go out to business like stores or open public places like in malls. Sme believe this virus is fake and not real and othres believe is a real thing. I do believe is real, because the speed this virus infect others is different than with a regular common cold or flu, is different.

My mom, my brother and myself were invited by our cousin to go over his house for Christmas eve , but in his house there will be 11 or 12 people, including us (not a lot). His house is small in order to keep like 2 mts apart from each other.

Updates:

1 y

Two weeks ago my mom and myself were together with these same cousins for some days during a local trip, so we were togehter, even if we broke family bubbles but that happened 3 weeks ago. Also I gathered with some 6 friends 1 week. ago at a empty bar., so far in my house we are fine. of course that is not an excuse that we won't catch the virus any other time aat another place.

My married sister does not want my mom my brother and myself to go over my cousins house cuse the house is small

1 y

and only the main front door to give the house some ventilation and there wotn be the correct social distancing and my sister is concerned more about mom catching the virus because we are breaking family bubbles. IThe reunion will be with the same people as the local trip I took 3 ks ago. SHe is very worried and mad if we go and my sister really has a lot of fear with this virus. My sister say if we go we have to wear masks at all times or to stay over just 2 hrs.

Answer 1

talloak | 251 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.

Guru

This a dilemma that most everyone faces. Ultimately, this is like so many dilemmas: do I do what I or someone else wants or do I do the right thing? You already know what the right thing to do is. Doing otherwise is being as stupid and selfish as those who refuse to do what is right.

Yes, chances are no one will get sick or die if you go. But is your mom’s life worth risking for one dinner? You can do everything perfectly to avoid infection but it only takes one infected person to bring death to the family.

The very invitation is irresponsible. My mom is elderly and we regularly have to keep the selfish away from her to preserve her life.

React

Asker

1 y
My bro is a grinch and he does not celebrate Christmas my dd is no longer with us and my mom won't cook and I dont want to cook either. for her it be nicer if we spend some hours with these family we already been with 3 weeeks ago.
talloak

1 y
Like I said, you already know the risks. Rationalizing will not make them go away.
Asker

1 y
But the irony my sister this weekend is going to a beach hotel with 2 female friends for somne vacations days. She says is not the same and all of them will of course foolow protocols by wearing masks etc etc.
Show All Show Less
Asker

1 y
I know but my sister is very mad at us

Answer 2

Asker

My bro is a grinch and he does not celebrate Christmas my dd is no longer with us and my mom won't cook and I dont want to cook either. for her it be nicer if we spend some hours with these family we already been with 3 weeeks ago.

Answer 3

talloak

Like I said, you already know the risks. Rationalizing will not make them go away.

Answer 4

Asker

But the irony my sister this weekend is going to a beach hotel with 2 female friends for somne vacations days. She says is not the same and all of them will of course foolow protocols by wearing masks etc etc.

Answer 5

Asker

I know but my sister is very mad at us

Answer 6

Anonymous

I think if everyone that's getting together is feeling fine (all the Covid questions they ask you), there's no reason not to still get together if everyone wants to. My family still does, but there isn't 11-12 of us either lol. But we have been still all along through this and so far so good with everyone. My mom is also in her 70's

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Answer 7

User2300

Xper 4

Do any of you have covid? If no you'll be safe. I don't know where you live but if you can get tested before to make sure everyone is clear, then I don't see an issue with going over to your cousin for Christmas.

React

Asker

1 y
No ANy of us had COVID buye one of my cousisn works in a public hospital. Im sure she had been tested many times before due to the job she does at the hospital. But when I meant breaking family bubbles is because we dont know who my cousins had been in contact with i mean that is understandable. and my mom and myself were with 3 of this cousins plus their senirpo parents 3 weeks ago at a local trtip we all took. I also gathered with 6 friends almost 2 weeks ago in a bar. The bar was prtactically empty anyway and my friends and I were alone in a private room inside the bar. Where I live the tests are not for free, we have to pay for them and one test is very expensive. In my country the only people who get tested are the ones with suspicious symptoms those get tested for free or if they want to pay but if you dont have any symptoms at all or you are lets say totally negative you dont get tested for free or even if you pay for it only if you have suspicious symptoms you are tested.
Asker

1 y
Also I had been hitting the gym for one month now and my sister also had advised me not even going to the gym either. When I go to the gym I dont do machines or touch equipments my work out is like dancing and here I dont touch people and keep my space as at the gym only 8 people are allwed inside the dancing room precisely to keep the social distancing. My sister tells me all of this for the sake of our mother is not even for my concern or my brother concerned, she is concerned that my brother and me bring the virus home and infect mom cause my brother and I are the ones out at the risk of being in public places.

My sister is not even organizing anything for the holidays herself to invite people she be with her husband alone int he house as she does not even inviting her in laws to her house. In my mom and myself case, the thing is that my dad is no longer with us in order to stay home and not going to our cousins house. I dotn want mom to feel bored alone in the house with us, I want to distract her a little bit so is the reason we are invited and also she will like to see her sister too. My brother is not like so fun of organizing anything for these ceelbrations he is a bit grinch and I dont have time or want to prepare any meal to do it at home for the 3 of us
Asker

1 y
My sister got into an argument with me yesterday cause she has a lot of fear for this virus and mom catching it from us. Well I dont want to have the virus myself either. If it was for my sister she thinks my brother and I should not go out and stay home as much as we can. or going out to run errands and dont stay too long outside with people or doing just errands. Well my sister is easy to say that, she works from home, she earns a salry and so does her husband and she does not need to worry to run errands cause the husband does it for he although my sister also goes out from time to time. But the fact that me and my brother are the ones living with mom and not her, is the reason she gets more concerned and have more fear of it and wants us to inflicts us fear for that. SHe believes we are not taking responsabilyt for our mom by doinbg what we do. And the reason she does not want us to go over our couisns house and stay home ourselves especialluy if my cousin house is small and jusst the front door has to be open for ventilation. Well he has a very tiny pationm, so that door can be open but the house itself is small and with 11 people or 12 for my sister that is a lot of people to have a proper distance
Show All Show Less
Asker

1 y
But the irony my sister this weekend is going to a beach hotel with 2 female friends for somne vacations days. She says is not the same and all of them will of course foolow protocols by wearing masks etc etc.
User2300

1 y
Here's the thing. You , your bro and mom should decide what to do. If your mom is comfortable going to that gathering , then go right ahead. Take all the necessary precautions tho.
Asker

1 y
Some say it be totally irresponsible if we go

Answer 8

Asker

No ANy of us had COVID buye one of my cousisn works in a public hospital. Im sure she had been tested many times before due to the job she does at the hospital. But when I meant breaking family bubbles is because we dont know who my cousins had been in contact with i mean that is understandable. and my mom and myself were with 3 of this cousins plus their senirpo parents 3 weeks ago at a local trtip we all took. I also gathered with 6 friends almost 2 weeks ago in a bar. The bar was prtactically empty anyway and my friends and I were alone in a private room inside the bar. Where I live the tests are not for free, we have to pay for them and one test is very expensive. In my country the only people who get tested are the ones with suspicious symptoms those get tested for free or if they want to pay but if you dont have any symptoms at all or you are lets say totally negative you dont get tested for free or even if you pay for it only if you have suspicious symptoms you are tested.

Answer 9

Asker

Also I had been hitting the gym for one month now and my sister also had advised me not even going to the gym either. When I go to the gym I dont do machines or touch equipments my work out is like dancing and here I dont touch people and keep my space as at the gym only 8 people are allwed inside the dancing room precisely to keep the social distancing. My sister tells me all of this for the sake of our mother is not even for my concern or my brother concerned, she is concerned that my brother and me bring the virus home and infect mom cause my brother and I are the ones out at the risk of being in public places.

My sister is not even organizing anything for the holidays herself to invite people she be with her husband alone int he house as she does not even inviting her in laws to her house. In my mom and myself case, the thing is that my dad is no longer with us in order to stay home and not going to our cousins house. I dotn want mom to feel bored alone in the house with us, I want to distract her a little bit so is the reason we are invited and also she will like to see her sister too. My brother is not like so fun of organizing anything for these ceelbrations he is a bit grinch and I dont have time or want to prepare any meal to do it at home for the 3 of us

Answer 10

Asker

My sister got into an argument with me yesterday cause she has a lot of fear for this virus and mom catching it from us. Well I dont want to have the virus myself either. If it was for my sister she thinks my brother and I should not go out and stay home as much as we can. or going out to run errands and dont stay too long outside with people or doing just errands. Well my sister is easy to say that, she works from home, she earns a salry and so does her husband and she does not need to worry to run errands cause the husband does it for he although my sister also goes out from time to time. But the fact that me and my brother are the ones living with mom and not her, is the reason she gets more concerned and have more fear of it and wants us to inflicts us fear for that. SHe believes we are not taking responsabilyt for our mom by doinbg what we do. And the reason she does not want us to go over our couisns house and stay home ourselves especialluy if my cousin house is small and jusst the front door has to be open for ventilation. Well he has a very tiny pationm, so that door can be open but the house itself is small and with 11 people or 12 for my sister that is a lot of people to have a proper distance

Answer 11

Asker

But the irony my sister this weekend is going to a beach hotel with 2 female friends for somne vacations days. She says is not the same and all of them will of course foolow protocols by wearing masks etc etc.

Answer 12

User2300

Here's the thing. You , your bro and mom should decide what to do. If your mom is comfortable going to that gathering , then go right ahead. Take all the necessary precautions tho.

Answer 13

Asker

Some say it be totally irresponsible if we go

Answer 14

pizzalovershouse | 672 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.

Master

I say be safe i been working from home an i only spend holidays with my mom sense she got hurt years ago in a accident so she has a hard time walking

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Asker

1 y
Im unemployued and so does my brother so for us is better to go over the house of my cousins and just bring one plate to share witht he people there. My nom can walk. But the irony my sister this weekend is going to a beach hotel with 2 female friends for somne vacations days. She says is not the same and all of them will of course foolow protocols by wearing masks etc etc.
pizzalovershouse

1 y
Do whats safe an you know is right

Answer 15

Asker

Im unemployued and so does my brother so for us is better to go over the house of my cousins and just bring one plate to share witht he people there. My nom can walk. But the irony my sister this weekend is going to a beach hotel with 2 female friends for somne vacations days. She says is not the same and all of them will of course foolow protocols by wearing masks etc etc.

Answer 16

pizzalovershouse

Do whats safe an you know is right

Answer 17

bklynbadboy1 | 742 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.

Guru

Its just one holiday don't risk it

React

Asker

1 y
Well I dont know if next year my eldenerly relatives can be alive to celebrate Christmas is a chance to atke it or not u know
bklynbadboy1

1 y
I feel you

Answer 18

Asker

Well I dont know if next year my eldenerly relatives can be alive to celebrate Christmas is a chance to atke it or not u know

Answer 19

bklynbadboy1

I feel you

Im in a dilema about the Covid virus and the upcoming holidays gatherings, What do you think?

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