Do you have a toxic parent or parents? What's it like for you and how did you find out they were toxic?

Question

Answer 1

Xper 7

I don't really have toxic parents, My dad is always stressed because of the hours he pulls and what he does at his job so he is easily snapped, but with all the years I've lived with them I know what not to say and when I shouldn't be saying it.

Answer 2

humanearth | 463 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.

Guru

My dad was a acholic, a wife beater, cheater and liked very young girls. Barly legal if you catch my drift.

My dad was true fuck up

Manduh

15 d
Shit. That's messed up.

Answer 3

Manduh

Shit. That's messed up.

Answer 4

Inquisitive3

Xper 5

If I explained it all, which I won't, most people would say yes but no one is perfect and we can choose to see the good or bad in anyone.

Manduh

15 d
That's true but sometimes the good is just a farce. They don't always have good intentions. I'm speaking from experience.
Inquisitive3

15 d
I suppose so but if a person is healthy, their parents fed them, wiped their butts as a baby, housed them, dressed them, etc.
Manduh

15 d
That's compulsory for a kid. That's what a parent is supposed to do no matter what because the kid is literally unable to do that on their own. That's irrelevant to what I'm talking about
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Inquisitive3

15 d
My parents don't take care of their babies at all. I think people should look for the good in others and be grateful for what is good in life. I can pick apart anyone and call them toxic. Most of the people on here are toxic... it's a matter of perspective.
Manduh

15 d
I'm grateful for having been taken care of when I was younger but my parents didn't bring me up. I did that on my own. You're right, most people on here might be real toxic but that's not what I'm talking about either. I'm sorry that your parents didn't take care of their babies like they should have. Being given everything but love and things that money can't buy will definitely raise a kid differently. What I'm trying to say is that even if we do look for the good in others or if we're grateful for everything that's good in life as you've said it still doesn't erase the fact that there are toxic parents out there. Being grateful and looking for the good won't stop that from happening.
Inquisitive3

15 d
Okay, my parents DID take care of me, that's what I am saying. I am grateful that they did, I have respect for my parents even if they were 'toxic' . How do you define 'toxic' anyway?
Manduh

15 d
Toxic as in narcissistic, abusive, destructive, sadistic, all that kind of stuff. Are they still toxic?
Inquisitive3

15 d
Diagnosed or your opinion?
Manduh

15 d
I'm not diagnosing anyone. You asked me how I define toxic so that's what I'm telling you. I've been reading up on it as well so I know enough to know what's toxic and what's not. And I asked if your parents are still toxic.
Manduh

15 d
And first you said that your parents didn't take care of their babies and then you said they did so which one is it?
Inquisitive3

15 d
Read back... I never said my parents didn't take care of me. Some parents don't so I am grateful to mine for providing for me when I was a child. You're allowed to hate your parents, I'm just stating my point of view on the situation which hopefully you recognize I am entitled to have even if it's different than yours.
Manduh

15 d
I did read back which is why I said that you said that your parents didn't take care of their babies. The fourth comment which is yours. The first word that says "my" which means yours. I didn't say they didn't take care of you. I simply stated what you said in your comment. I respect your opinion as well and I'm well aware that we're all entitled to our opinions too. I don't hate my parents, I could never hate them. I just have one toxic parent who I still don't hate by the way but thank you for sharing your opinion 🙂.
Inquisitive3

15 d
Oh my bad...

Sorry! I was looking at my previous comment before that... the other should've been many***** parents. I see the confusion now :) Yeah, my parents took care of me well physically. I went through a long period of hating them for failing me in some areas. I know no one is perfect though so I forgive them now.
Manduh

15 d
That's great! I'm glad you've forgiven them :)
Inquisitive3

15 d
Thank you. It was a journey for sure.

Answer 5

Manduh

That's true but sometimes the good is just a farce. They don't always have good intentions. I'm speaking from experience.

Answer 6

Inquisitive3

I suppose so but if a person is healthy, their parents fed them, wiped their butts as a baby, housed them, dressed them, etc.

Answer 7

Manduh

That's compulsory for a kid. That's what a parent is supposed to do no matter what because the kid is literally unable to do that on their own. That's irrelevant to what I'm talking about

Answer 8

Inquisitive3

My parents don't take care of their babies at all. I think people should look for the good in others and be grateful for what is good in life. I can pick apart anyone and call them toxic. Most of the people on here are toxic... it's a matter of perspective.

Answer 9

Manduh

I'm grateful for having been taken care of when I was younger but my parents didn't bring me up. I did that on my own. You're right, most people on here might be real toxic but that's not what I'm talking about either. I'm sorry that your parents didn't take care of their babies like they should have. Being given everything but love and things that money can't buy will definitely raise a kid differently. What I'm trying to say is that even if we do look for the good in others or if we're grateful for everything that's good in life as you've said it still doesn't erase the fact that there are toxic parents out there. Being grateful and looking for the good won't stop that from happening.

Answer 10

Inquisitive3

Okay, my parents DID take care of me, that's what I am saying. I am grateful that they did, I have respect for my parents even if they were 'toxic' . How do you define 'toxic' anyway?

Answer 11

Manduh

Toxic as in narcissistic, abusive, destructive, sadistic, all that kind of stuff. Are they still toxic?

Answer 12

Inquisitive3

Diagnosed or your opinion?

Answer 13

Manduh

I'm not diagnosing anyone. You asked me how I define toxic so that's what I'm telling you. I've been reading up on it as well so I know enough to know what's toxic and what's not. And I asked if your parents are still toxic.

Answer 14

Manduh

And first you said that your parents didn't take care of their babies and then you said they did so which one is it?

Answer 15

Inquisitive3

Read back... I never said my parents didn't take care of me. Some parents don't so I am grateful to mine for providing for me when I was a child. You're allowed to hate your parents, I'm just stating my point of view on the situation which hopefully you recognize I am entitled to have even if it's different than yours.

Answer 16

Manduh

I did read back which is why I said that you said that your parents didn't take care of their babies. The fourth comment which is yours. The first word that says "my" which means yours. I didn't say they didn't take care of you. I simply stated what you said in your comment. I respect your opinion as well and I'm well aware that we're all entitled to our opinions too. I don't hate my parents, I could never hate them. I just have one toxic parent who I still don't hate by the way but thank you for sharing your opinion 🙂.

Answer 17

Inquisitive3

Oh my bad...

Sorry! I was looking at my previous comment before that... the other should've been many***** parents. I see the confusion now :) Yeah, my parents took care of me well physically. I went through a long period of hating them for failing me in some areas. I know no one is perfect though so I forgive them now.

Answer 18

Manduh

That's great! I'm glad you've forgiven them :)

Answer 19

Inquisitive3

Thank you. It was a journey for sure.

Answer 20

DizzyDesii | 822 opinions shared on Family & Friends topic.

Master

My moms toxic in terms of trying to take financial advantage as well as ruining my relationships whenever she's single

DizzyDesii

15 d
In 2014, i’d spend most of my college refunds on her. She started taking advantage after a while and i cut it out with motivation from my ex in 2018. She couldnt stand it and then she tried to ruin our relationship.
Manduh

15 d
Yeah that's pretty toxic. Is she better now?
DizzyDesii

15 d
She still tries but i shut her ungrateful ass down a lot. I already give a quarter of my check to help with bills. she's not getting more than that
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Manduh

15 d
It's good that you put your foot down. She should know her limits
DizzyDesii

15 d
Yea but she still takes emotional advantage when she doesn't get her way. Its sad when you feel bullied sometimes like HS all over again
Manduh

15 d
I have a feeling she could be a narcissist. My mum is too and from what you've told me she shows the same symptoms. It's better to distance yourself from people like this especially when they're your family.
DizzyDesii

15 d
Yea she's def a narcissist. Thats why when i move i won't come back much
Manduh

15 d
Good for you. I hope she leaves you alone. It'll take some time for me to move out but when I do I'll have minimal contact with my mum too.
DizzyDesii

15 d
I was almost out until the pandemic
Manduh

15 d
The pandemic ruined so many things 🤦🏽‍♀️

Answer 21

DizzyDesii

In 2014, i’d spend most of my college refunds on her. She started taking advantage after a while and i cut it out with motivation from my ex in 2018. She couldnt stand it and then she tried to ruin our relationship.

Answer 22

Manduh

Yeah that's pretty toxic. Is she better now?

Answer 23

DizzyDesii

She still tries but i shut her ungrateful ass down a lot. I already give a quarter of my check to help with bills. she's not getting more than that

Answer 24

Manduh

It's good that you put your foot down. She should know her limits

Answer 25

DizzyDesii

Yea but she still takes emotional advantage when she doesn't get her way. Its sad when you feel bullied sometimes like HS all over again

Answer 26

Manduh

I have a feeling she could be a narcissist. My mum is too and from what you've told me she shows the same symptoms. It's better to distance yourself from people like this especially when they're your family.