How do I talk to this girl?

I know it seems like I'm a dweeb but just hear me out for a minute...

I never have any luck with girls. Every time I have a conversation with a girl it never gets deep into the convo and things just break down. I never know how to keep it going and it drives me crazy because I've been feeling real lonely lately. The only time I had a girlfriend we barely talked and never saw each other. It was just dreadful. So anyway to the topic...

Every year I attend a national convention in July. Over there I saw this incredibly gorgeous girl that I just had to meet. But me being the chicken I am, I secluded myself from her and just hung out with my friends. One of my friends met her and started talking to her. He had a girlfriend so he tried setting me up with her, but at the time, he couldn't find me. He kept telling me how we were real perfect for each other and all that other jazz, so the first thing I did when I got home from the convention was to add her on Facebook. I was gonna start talking to her but I chickened out of course and nothing happened.

Lately I've been thinking about her again. Asking myself what if I never chickened out. I would love to start talking to her but I would never know how to introduce myself without making it obvious that I'm interested. Not to mention how would I keep a conversation going (like what topics to discuss). I don't know, this is the stuff I worry about on my free time. But anyway, can anyone help me out? I would really appreciate it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • First off, it seems like you need a little bit more confidence when talking to girls. Trial and error, man. How are you supposed to learn anything if you're not throwing yourself out there? Girls aren't that scary. At least not nice girls. I find it endearing when a guy really makes an effort to talk to me, even if he seems a bit shy and lost. Coffinspire's idea of what to say to her and talk to her about is the best, use that method when saying hi to her on Facebook. And don't worry, there's nothing wrong with showing a little interest in her at the start. In fact, if you're just a little bit flirtier with her, it'll be easier for you to not get labeled as just a friend or an acquaintance. Girls need that tiny spark almost right off the bat with a guy for her to gain more interest in him. Most girls are really quick when it comes to friendzoning guys, so showing a little bit of interest in the beginning is almost completely harmless. Just don't overdo it. Drop tiny hints here and there, maybe give her a small compliment. It's really easy when you get the hang of it.

    As for continuing a conversation, just talk about whatever you feel like. Asking her questions will pretty much get her talking, and it'll give her some space to ask you questions too. If you still reach a dead end, keep it up with the questions simply by playing 20 questions. It might give you some more topics to discuss, like if you ask her what her favorite movie is and she replies with a movie you think is great too, you can talk about how awesome that movie is for a while. Then continue. When I play 20 questions with guys I'm getting to know, we almost never reach the 20th question because we just get so much to talk about that we forget we were even playing.

    I hope this helps! Good luck, and remember to keep your head held high :)


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What Girls Said 1

  • Well you could start off by talking on Facebook, no harm in that. Say "hey I saw you at the convention what did you think of it? I didn't get the chance to talk to you but my friend said you were pretty cool" and go from there and if the convo ends up going south a little go to the back up plan that always works, ask about what she likes to do for hobbies, because if there is any topic that will keep a girl talking, it's herself. And talk to her like she's your friend and not an interest because sometimes being forwards backfires and your already showing interest enough by talking to her. Pretty much don't tell her you like her until she tells you first.


What Guys Said 1

  • You should always make it obvious that you're interested in her. Perhaps, she's interested in you as well, and you're just ruining your chances. Even if she's not interested, she can start thinking if she's really attracted to you, and things will turn to your fravor.

    Also, just introduce yourself, say "Hi, I'm kinglio21093, nice to meet you." Have a long handshake then comment how her hand is warm, then start blabbering how hands of this has an effect of on your future or whatever funny you can come up in your mind. That should get you a little laugh or smile. Then about topics to discuss, just talk about what you see around like that book lying in the table. Then you can talk about both of your childhood, dreams, career, and goals. That will mean a lot to her.