What do I say to girl after this , caught her with another guy I know

it was so unexpected and at the same time devastating , I was at work and she pulled in her car and beside her was one of my male co-workers who I though was my friend and respected me but apparently not . but yeah they had been hanging out this after noon it turns out and went on a romantic hike that they didn't bother to tell me about , like I'm so upset as I like her so much and been trying to get her for a while now and we almost slept togeher once and we get along so well , but this is just too much to even deal with , I just can't stand the though of her seeing another guy from work and the fact I had to find out by accident just makes me so upset rate now .

what do I even say to her after finding this out in the worst kind of way ?

well this isn't going to well , I logged on msn tonight in appear offline mode and she was online as soon as I signed in she went to offline , it doesn't look like were speaking at the moment , this is going to get pretty damm akward I suspect .


Most Helpful Girl

  • With all due respect, you're not dating her nor are you in an exclusive relationship with her. Certainly I understand your emotion and reactions to this, it's shocking! However, she is single and allowed to date and see who she wants.

    In terms of the co-worker, I think his behavior is opportunist, disrespectful and he is untrustworthy. I would not mingle with him on a personal level anymore, keep it professional since you have to collaborate.

    I don't think it's your place to say anything. I think that if you want the circumstances to change, then consider spending more time with her so you can determine if a relationship is possible.

    • Well I agree the co-worker was very disrespectful to me and he is untrustworthy . I had to see him today and lets just say not a lot was said and I had to stop myself from calling him what I was thinking of him deep down.

      i won't get the chance to spend much more time with her in the immediate future as she's going on a long trip very soon but I'd still be interested in dating her once she got back , but maybe the fact she is leaving for a bit is a good thing as she's caused me a lot of hearta

    • I concur. Give yourself and her some time to cool off. When she returns, perhaps you can start anew with her and see if it goes anywhere. There is also the old adage..."Absence makes the heart grow fonder............" maybe this will apply in this case.

    • I hope so , well my only real hope here is that things work out in the long run as the short term is clearly very messed up but things do clear up and people forgive over time . maybe she needs to go on this trip and will be in a better mood when she returns , also it gives myself some time to clear my head and I won't be as focused on her .

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • give it time.

    if you still feel like you have to talk to her, then do so

    it sounds like she is not ready to talk to you just yet, and feels bad that you had to find out that way.

    just give her space for a fews days, then just ask her how she is doing, most importantly don't mention anything about the other guy, most girls find that really awkward or annoying.

    if you really want her to feel bad, ask her when you are in a good mood. that would drive anyone crazy.

    • I didn't say anything to her about it today , I did send her a text yesterday just saying I'd like to talk to her but she didn't reply . maybe I'll get a chance to talk to her tomorrow but she's also leaving soon for a trip so not really sure .

What Guys Said 1

  • If you're not exclusively going out there's nothing you have the right to say. She probably just sees it as enjoying being single until she hits it off the right way with someone. For all you or even your co worker knows she could be dating 2 other guys. So you either fight for her by trying to spend time with her like he did or you give up to keep the piece. If she's into him more than you big the bigger man and don't whine about it, just move on.

    • Yeah I'm not really sure of the whole thing , I don't think she really wants to date him or me at the moment as she's going on a month long trip of europe or something like that so she wasn't looking for anything rate now was what I though . anyways this is also a seaonal job so it was coming to an end soon anyways and maybe that's for the best as she's caused me a lot of trouble and my male co-workers there don't seem to respect me , soon be time to find something else to work at