I have been wondering for a while...

Why, do people look other people in the eye when they talk? I've tried doing it a few times and it just feels really really weird. I always look at peoples mouth. Now maybe it has to do with me being born half deaf, and I do it to hear what someone says as long as read their lips, just in case I don't hear exactly what they say. But why is it that it is socially known to look people in the eyes while you are talking. The only time I feel comfortable doing this, is when I am talking to a girl I like and I would look deep into her eyes as if I was looking into her soul. so to speak...


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, eye movement is coupled with sincerity and honesty, they twitch this way and that way depending on which part of the brain you're activating, sometimes enough that head movement follows. Rapid eye movement is also a sign of nervosity, which can be contributed to dishonesty too. The level of pupil dilation is also indicative of a lot of things, including attraction, stress and pain. In addition, many of the muscles around the eyes are used to convey emotion and intent, for example movement of the eyebrows.

    Books are written in volumes on the issue of eyes betraying the intent and emotion of a person, and these are just a few obvious examples off the top of my head. The vast majority of these signs are interpreted subconsciously, meaning eye contact is the most useful tool when it comes to reading body language, both with intent, and subliminally.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Because our pupils dilate when we see something we are attracted too or just like the person. It's a biological unconscious thing.

    Apart of human behavior, that we don't recognize when and why we're doing it.

    Have a look at this picture: link

    When you go out on date, this is a good tool to discover if she/he likes you.

    Where did I get this knowledge from and how can you leverage this knowledge?

    From a book called 'The definitive book of Body Language - Alan and Barbara Pease.

    Pick it up.

    All the best,


    • Is that link suppose to be a before and after picture? because it says apart and together. as in relationship status?

      Now I do look girls in the eye, if I'm interested in them, or they are not talking, but the second they talk my eyes automatically go straight to their mouth. Otherwise I might not be able to hear everything they say. But if that link is suppose to be the same lady you can tell the top is casual the bottom is "hunting" so to speak

  • learn some NLP look it up you will know why body language can be important. I would say more but others are better on that subject

  • I look everybody, men or women, directly in the eyes when I talk to them. I can't help it, the eyes give away lies, and I can tell sincerity from that. MEN take it as a challenging thing, and some women find it disconcerting too.

    so much of hat people say is CRAP they are just saying I to say it, or worse to get something. I look people right I the eyes when I talk to them. liars, shifty people, thieves, backstabbers... they don't like it, I can tell.

    WHy do parents tell a xhild to look them in the eye? SImple... to see if they are lying, lol

    I look people in the eye when Italk to them...I want them to SEE I am not lying or being insincere. If I am talking to YOU, you now know you have my full attention.

    • Well if you are talking to me, and you look me straight in the eye, I wouldn't have a clue on if I have your full attention because I will be focused on your lips haha. But when it comes to lying by looking them in the eye, since I have been reading lips my whole life, I have the same sense and can tell when someone is lying by the different movements in their lips as well as the muscle movements around the lower part of the face. Not exactly the same thing, but same concept..

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