What can you do if you hate yourself and your appearance?

Anonymous
I have huge issues with myself and my life ever since middle school basically.
I spent most of my time hating myself and putting me down and it makes me so depressed that I can't focuse on anything else in life thats important and I can't move on with my life.
My biggest issue is that I hate how I look. I have developed this hate over years. I was bullied in school and after that I never made any friends again and no one was ever interested in me. I became an outcast. So I assumed I was too ugly to be liked by anyone. There were relationships as well. I lived lonely for most of my life.

I have considered plastic surgery for years and still am not aversed to it but I would so much money I don't have and my family will declare me nuts even though I don't really care.
They of course tell me I am not hideous and a few other people have told me as well but I can't see it. I see celebraties and think I need to look like that if I wanna have people like me and think I look good.
I am already us
ing fillers for my face in order to feel better and surgery would be just a step up if I could afford it. I am already getting broke with the fillers but it's the only thing that makes me feel like I can do something against how bad I feel. And still it's not enough. I am not satisfied. I want to be better every time. I see beautiful people and get jeleaous and I want to become more like that. I also have a radical fear of aging because it makes me even more unattractive.
I want to get rid of the smallest wrinkles and look younger already.
And despite of all of my efforts. Expensive skin care and beauty procedures it makes not that much of a difference. People still don't want me.
I am at a point where I considered getting so much done that I look like these plastic celebs just so that people will acknowledge me sometimes.
I wish I didn't have to do all this. My life consists of nothing else. But if I don't I can't feel happiness or worth anymore.
What can you do if you hate yourself and your appearance?
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