What do you look for in a girl for a life-partner?

For the single men guys who are looking for a significant other for life. What are some qualities in a mate are you looking for? Are these qualities based on past experiences or relationships?

If you are already married or in a committed relationship. What made you decide that she was the one? Or did you just stick with her out of sheer comfort of having been in the relationship for a long time.
For men looking for cooks, would you be expecting your partner to cook if she had a full-time career?


Most Helpful Guy

  • <- Single (Not advertising, just saying...) ;D

    The obvious things:

    - Effort

    - Respect

    - Ambition / Determination / Drive

    - Congruency (Don't play mind games / etc) !

    - Honesty


    The harder-to-find qualities:

    1) I got tired of being the guy who "analyzed everyone" in order to try and find a perfect mate before investing the effort.. So now I'm looking for partners that I can have fun with.. if I can have fun with you, and you have a few qualities compared to my ideals for appearance/personality - then you have a great potential for blooming into a relationship.

    2) DOES NOT talk to me like I'm anything other than a genuine guy. SERIOUS turn off.. When a girl treats me like her "girlfriend" or like I'm some idiot / etc.. I laugh and move on to people that matter. It's part of the whole "Respect" thing.. And furthermore, I'm really bewildered why PEOPLE in general talk to strangers about their problems...?

    3) Doesn't try to pull the expectation cards.. Instead tries to show me that's she's worth it.. I hate hearing BS like "I want you to call me more".. I want to see that when I call, that you can hold a conversation.. that you can make me laugh, etc.. It makes me DESIRE doing things for "us" - not just you.

    IMPORTANT: 4) Keeps me in-line.. there's times that our relationship will be challenged or rivaled with other opportunities.. It's the women who strive to make it last that get the most effort out of me, not the ones who try to find a reason to give up.

    SUPER-Important: 5) She knows how attraction works for me.. What really makes me want to stick around. What... "holds me" at the edge of my seat, waiting for what's going to happen next.

    This list could go on forever.. And I don't "Expect" anything from the list.. These are just my preferences and "benchmarks" for seeing if I'm willing to take the risk to fight for a new relationship.

    As for a summarization for an easy-to-memorize carbon-copy of what I said:

    - I want someone who takes effort into "herself" and into the potential "us"; a GENUINE person.. Someone who has stuff to talk about.. Someone who is honest, respectful, etc.. Someone who would treat me with the same "chivalry" that I would treat them with.. But not someone who is forcing it.. Just someone that is a good person deep to their personality.

    ~ ArtistBBoy

    • Unfortunately I think we are a little wired to put out at least some expectations. Women are generally at the losing end of relationships especially at the later part in terms of making babies and aging faster looks -wise but tend to live a longer life and end up grieving for a lost partner. But I do agree that women should try to show their worth more. Not sure about having us keeping you in line especially if the challenges you are talking about is about fidelity.

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What Guys Said 5

  • I want to feel deeply attracted to my partner. That is usually a combination of physical attraction and emotional attraction. I want someone who treats me as well as I treat her. I want someone who values me and understands that I'm a catch and won't just treat me like her flavor of the month. You probably wanted more specifics but I'm flexible in a lot of areas if these other areas are met. The stuff about being treated equitably and like I'm a catch is after being with someone who took advantage of my kind heart.

    • If I was wearing panties, that would get them off. Well said.

    • I'm actually interested in specifics related to past experiences. Like something you decide you like or don't like from past relationships.

  • 3 things I look for:

    1.a home-body know how to cook and do household chores, but definitely I'll help doing chores also lol

    2.loves children, and considers having kids and taking care of them

    3. lastly before 1and 2..i know she loves me and there is trust in the relationship before I propose marriage.

  • Trustworthiness, introversion, kindness, willingness to make me happy, not being a party girl

  • I'd want to make sure she can cook, is willing to put up with me and will trust me.

  • My only mandatory criteria is that I love her and she loves me back. Everything else is up in the air.

    • Do you know what qualities in a lady would help you love her enough that you would want to spend the rest of your life with her?

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