Let's talk! Serious issue. hy does it seem like we have to get all fit just for you guys to notice us?

If us girls lost weight and was very fit (meaning not lookin like a dude), would you guys all of a sudden wanna pay attention? Because it seems as though most women will accept a fat ass man, but let us women be fat as hell, then all of a sudden we're so unattractive, and we're looked down upon by society. I'm not saying that I'm fat, Because I'm not. Even if we wasn't fat, and we didn't have a flat tummy, and we have loose arms, and a round face, guys still don't seem to pay attention. Why does it seem like we have to get all fit just for you guys to notice us, when us women would actually give an unfit man a chance? Also, women do you agree? Men what do you think.

I personally don't think it's fair. Most men says it's the personality, and then looks. But I'm finding out that doesn't seem to be true.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree with you. It's pretty silly. I think as a society we need to bring people up and find better ways to treat people. Yes there are fat people in society, and yes some of them are unhealthy. But not every fat person is fat because of the same reasons. Some people want to categorize everyone into specific stereotypes, and it seems that the 'fat person' stereotype is one of the ones still acceptable to use.

    I can understand why someone who is very athletic and health driven may not want to date someone who is not. Their hobbies may not be accommodating to the other, possibly. But I think where society goes wrong is when it lumps all people who are not athletically built or slim into the "OMG they are obese they are automatically ridiculously unhealthy category". I'm pretty sure I will get thumbs down for this, but you can be bigger and still healthy. It's just a matter of one's lifestyle. There are also slim and average sized people who are unhealthy. I have friends who eat junk all the time but don't gain it. They are only now starting to see how bad it is.

    I know when I was online, I found it hard to find a guy who would even message me back or talk to me because I put on my profile that I was "larger". I even had full-body pictures of me. But guys were still turned off because they figure if I was larger I must be massive!

    I even had some guys surprised when they met me because they were figuring I was much bigger than I actually was. I don't know why some people are so afraid of hanging around with someone larger. It's silly! I exercise, I eat healthy, but I am still fat! I have a condition, and it sucks because people always dismiss it, even though they have never been through what I have been through.

    I find it odd because I don't seem to have any issues in regular life. I can go to the store and nobody takes notice. I am not really that big. But in the dating world it's this big deal. I guess it's just the society we live in.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • It's both. I work out hard to look the way I do. I do this both for myself and for potential partners. I think it's nice to get something in return. To be perfectly honest, and I know some fatties are going to hate me for this but honestly. I think being overweight and unfit shows a lack o character and discipline and inability to care of oneself.

  • It is unfair but it seems women are more acceptable of heavy guys than vice-versa. Personally, I exercise 5 days a week, eat right most of the time and am in great condition. I've done that mainly for myself considering my family history of hypertension. Now my lady friend on the other hand is really out of shape, eats junk all the time and has dealt with cholesterol issues since she was a teen. She's 10 years younger than me but she won't outlive me at the pace she's going. So fairness in this case is a two way street. If we work hard to look good for you girls you should do the same.


What Girls Said 1

  • I reckon its all to do with the media. The media creates and we take it all in, So we feel the need to be skinny because that's what is portrayed as the norm out there. I don't think I've seen a big woman out there in magazines without it being an article which ridicules her size. Its just what society expects and that makes us feel insecure, which makes us want to become the 'ideal' woman who is slim. So its kinda like a vicious circle.


Recommended myTakes