Should body issues hold me back from women?

I’m a very skinny and physically weak man. To be blunt my body sucks! It’s not fair! I feel my body could never please a woman. I don’t approach girls because of this. T_T I feel girls deserve better guys with better bodies, so why should I even try.

Am I wrong to think this way? Please don’t give me socially correct answers. I want the hard truth.

Currently I don't approach girls. I did in the past and was always rejected. I work out at the local gym. I have a home gym. Nothing changes body wise.
I researched body building for many years because of this. Sought books, videos, friends who bodybuild and weightlift, and professional trainers. They said short sets, short reps, lift heavy, many small meals throughout the day, protein supplements, get enough sleep, don't do too much cardio, have enough rest days in the week. I did all this since I was 16 and nothing changed.
There are people born with big muscles. They don't even exercise and they already look good. That's why I said it's not fair.


Most Helpful Girl


    • Just found some pics on the Internet that resemble my body. The 3rd guy has a little more meat than me in the arms, shoulders and lower chest, but you get the idea.

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    • no to the low standard. and if your average looking and you can make me laugh at stupid sh*t and be able to laugh at yourself too...thats like gold... you came here for opinions. I gave chill and back off...ur the one with the low self esteem and insecuries and sh*t bout his body.

    • sorry I meant no offense. Looks like I have a lot of re-thinking to do. thx for your time and opinion.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 4

  • You really need to stop focusing on guys with muscles who are ripped, guys like that are mostly always over confident, big headed jerks, they think they are something, I would actually prefear a skinny, sweet, sensitive and caring guy than a guy who constanly fancies himself in the mirror lol, those big jock guys in the gym are mostly all cheating scum, even a muscley guy admited he is cheating on a girl with another girl as if id not mind and be his third little girlfriend, just sick.

    The thing is you just have a high metabolism, that is why you can't put on weight or gain muscle, I know a few people who have to eat the double amount of food like eating for two like a pregnant woman lol because their metabolism works that fast they are still hungry even after one regular sized meal, your just being too hard on yourself and not accepting yourself for who you are, your comparing yourself constantly to other guys but you are not them, you never will be and were all different, all I see these days is guys and girls getting into trends copying each other and acting like they are something when non of them are original whatsoever, be original, don't be like other people, here's the honest truth, if I went out with a guy I would want him to be completely himself and not be comparing himself to others or listening to what others say to them all the time, I want him to have his own mind and beliefs, all I am seeing is people trying to change you by encouraging your insecurities, all others want these days is to be who they want you to be, and generally people our ages are very immature, all they focus on is looks and sex all the time, they are full of hormones lol, people deserve better than that though, I actually currently (and have for a while) fancy the socks off a really skinny guy who is also one inch and a half in height smaller than me, not because of what he looks like but because he is very sweet, cuddly, sensitive and more importantly himself :), you just need to find the right person, hang in there.

  • i find overly muscular guys absolutely repulsive. the sight of a man like Ronny from jersey shore actually makes me noxious. I love thinner men especially with long torsos, don't be afraid to approach women because of this! that just makes me sad to hear. Plus, most curvy woman LOVE skinny guys

  • Hey don't beat yourself up for being skinny. I know plenty of girls who would date a skinny guy like you.

  • Dude- Ur like a curvy girl's dream!

    • Amen to that lol I'm chubby and curvy and well... I like skinny guys as they know what it's like for people to pick on them :) perfect match.

    • haha I know that!

What Guys Said 3

  • I used to be skinny and lanky and weak, but Its this low self image you have of yourself. Live with confidence, approach women and work out with confidence as well. Don't let rejections get you down. Keep at it, don't stop working out. and you can get bigger, you just have to work hard, and eat right.

    I started working out 5 days a week and eating about 4000 calories a day and I put on 25 pounds of muscle in the last few years

  • Try going for skinny girls; I saw this really cute tall, skinny girl at WalMart yesterday, but had no oppportunity to approach. Dang.

    • Well slim and tone is fine. But I'm not into really skinny girls, just like I don't like my really skinny body. I don't even blame girls who don't like me based on my body. That's why I tried so hard to bulk up.

  • Here's the hard truth - your body is not the issue.

    You could go the gym and bulk up every day between now and doomsday.

    You still wouldn't approach girls.

    The hard truth is that you're scared. You blame your body, your come up with excuses like - girls *deserve* a guy with a better body. But as humiliating as it might seem to admit those failings - those aren't the reasons you don't approach girls. You're even more humiliated to say the truth. You're scared. You're cowardly.

    Stephen Hawking doesn't exactly have a great body. He's been married more than once you know.

    Bodies aren't everything. And somewhere inside, you already knew this.

    What it ultimately comes down to, is having the guts to approach girls.

    If you hit the gym for a year, you'll have a decent body. Enough to look like a swimmer or long distance runner anyway. You'll probably never look like a weight lifter or body builder. (Genetics, what can you do.)

    But you'll still be a coward. Unless and until you work on that side of yourself - your mental side. The good news is, that takes about a year too. You put in the effort now, in two years you'll have a trim swimmers body and the confidence to use it.

    But you have to put in the effort - and do the work yourself.

    Sitting around moping and whining and complaining on the internet, isn't step one.

    • Nothing changes body wise, because you don't know what you're doing.

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    • RE: Update - Yeah yeah, boo hoo, life isn't fair.

      Get over it.

      Genetics is a lottery. You weren't born handicapped to a starving mother in the third world, to die of starvation before you got to your third birthday.

      You're already ahead of plenty in this world.

      Quit bitching about the world not being fair, and deal with it for what it is.

      It sounds like you got all the advice you needed to build muscle. If you didn't follow it, that's your business.

    • I was very dedicated. I followed what my friends & trainers recommended with the exercises diet, etc. Diet was high-protein: chicken, beef, tofu, eggs, protein shakes, etc. Plus carbs for energy: rice, bread, pasta. Plus fruits & veggies for fiber, etc. Over the years we made adjustments to try to get results. I took weight-gainer formulas & protein supplements. Another skinny dude at the gym was frustrated like me, not gaining. You can do everything right but still lose I think.