Should I end it all ?

im ugly , I'm not a funny guy, I'm shy , I have ugly facial structure , I work out and that still makes me ugly , I spend hours at therapy and I'm still clinically depressed , I take so antidepressants . I never had a girlfriend nor a female friend . I spend money on good clothes yet I'm still ugly . I get angry at couples because I know I can never experience theyre happiness . No girl ever wants to talk to me , every girl I try to talk to ignores me . I've never had standards , I just want a female to like me behind my ugly face or be desperate enough to settle for the bottom of society , the people who don't deserve to live , me .

Why should I go on living when I know I will never be loved , and why should other people suffer from looking at my ugliness ?

Personality dosnt matter unless the guy is good looking.

women like confidence is as flawed junk science as 1+1=J

Ive been told to kill myself because I'm never going to get a girlfriend and its been 19 years and they are right.

I have a few humane methods of ending it , and attaching a letter with hopes that if I get on a news channel , females would see what theyre shallowness has lead to .

But that is till when I turn 20 , but untill then , I'm crying everyday now , will I ever get a girl to like me ?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Whatever people say about you are only true if you let yourself to believe such. Are you seriously just going to live a life trying to please others? So what if others say you're ugly? Why believe that and let your life be miserable?

    Whoever said that you go kill yourself must be out of his mind. Ending life for something as shallow as this is not worth it. To tell you, I'm 20 and never had a boyfriend. No relationship whatsoever even just casual dating or something. Worst is, I'm always compared at with my cousin who already has a boyfriend. But, honestly, I don't care. Why should I? It's not like the end of the world if I don't have relationship. I find joy in the company of my friends, family and God. I believe everything happens at the right time. You just got to wait.

    You've got to start having more confidence in yourself. What they say isn't important as long as you feel good about yourself. You are handsome, believe me. I've also felt so ugly before since no one ever said they liked me. But you what, I realized that all that matters really is not what others say. I don't need others to tell me I'm pretty. I just got to believe in myself that I am. After I did that, I've had a couple of people in college say I'm cute. Whatever you feel inside, I believes it channels on the outside.

    God created you in His image. Everyone is pretty and handsome. We've just got to wait until someone sees us that way :) but I'm not worrying too much about that. If I end up not getting married, that's fine. As long as I am happy doing the things I love and know that my life is being spent well, I'm already very contented.

    Life is too precious to end like this. Think how blessed you are that you're given this chance to enjoy life. Go to a hospital and visit cancer patients or critically ill people. You'll know what I'm talking about. They would gladly do whatever it takes to add a few days into their life.

    • The question asker is a troll! He shouldn't be saying things that make others fear for his safety,it's not right. Everyone knows women will date ugly guys,the unemployed,and criminals before they would give a good looking honest man a chance.

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    • Don't worry about it too much, you're still young. There's plenty of time to meet that girl who is going to be worth all the wait. I'm also still in the process of waiting for 'the one', so I could relate with you in a way. I guess let's just leave this for fate to decide. If we're meant to be with someone, then we're meant to be.

    • i don't want "the one" . that's called a wife . I want to at least girlfriend , or at least a first kiss or first hug or something

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • Every person wants different things, every person look at things differently. If you see yourself as an ugly person, other people might not see that way and others will. No matter a person looks like, there will be people who will and won't like them. Just like the celebrities, they are all good looking but not all people likes them.

    You are created in God's own image and likeness. Everyone is unique, don't say that you're ugly because no matter what happens there will be that someone who will appreciate you for who you are and will love you for what you really are.

    Just because you think you're ugly and never had a girlfriend will be enough just to end your life. You are loved by people and will be love by the people that you will meet. Patience is just a key to happiness, they say that happiness is like a butterfly, the more you chase it the more it elude you, so just wait until that girl will come along and make you happy. But while waiting for that girl, do something that will make you happy. Love yourself first and tell yourself that you're not ugly and you're worth living in this world. Why would you end it all when you haven't even experienced the happiness that you have been waiting for? 19 years is not that long to wait, many people experience happiness by waiting 60 years of their lives. Start loving yourself. That is the most important thing that you can do. :)

    • "start loving yourself" ? you really think its that easy . + I have a very few friends and no family except my older brother who lives 1000 miles away

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    • noone is helping . telling me to be happy isn't help

    • Then what do you wanna hear from us? lol.

  • Girls don't like guys that don't like themselves. As cliche and ridiculous as it is, it's true.

    They also don't want you to be really really needy. You know, I'm nothing without them.

    Find something you like about yourself, and expand on it. I'm not very attractive but I really like my smile. So I go out of my way to be that smiley person. Guys never EVER showed interest in me until I learned that I have to give them a good reason to be interested. The only times I've ever had somebody interested in me is when I was so busy, my life was so full of things, that I almost couldn't fit them in. Girls operate the same way. They don't WANT to be the ONLY things in your life. Get a hobby. Do things that make you happy and interest you. If you are never anyone interesting, then no one will be interested.

    As for the killing yourself, I would recommend it. Tried that. Pretty overrated. And what I learned is that if you can't really succeed or feel the need to reach out then you actually WANT to live. Take that spark, that life, that says "I'm still here" and turn it into something. Women can give a rats ass about looks. (Some of the ugliest men I know are married with children because they had enough enthusiasm about something to attract people).

    Instead of spending your money on good clothes, getting angry at couples, and throwing standards out the window, spend your money on a hobby. Maybe your into music. Go to concerts! You now have something to talk about with people. Instead of getting angry at couples, maybe you shouldn't be afraid to be friends with a few. They are sometimes the best ways to get set up on blind dates. (This is were having something interesting to talk about comes in. Dates are about conversation, not trying to get in someone's pants) Lastly, build yourself a list of things you want in a woman. Don't be afraid to have standards! Men without standards are the bottom of the barrel. Doesn't matter if they're Brad Pitt or Sasquatch. If they have no standards we aren't interested. Women want to find out they meet your standards! It's like a subconscious sign we are a good match. No standards = no women. Standards = women.

    • Also, I was 20 before I even had a guy interested in me. And he was super shy so it took a few months before we went on a date, and another month before he even kissed me.

      Things take time. Life is just beginning, no sense in ending it before you get a chance to live.

    • if I have standards then people will tell me to lower them . Girls never want to talk to me ,if I have something interesting or not . they tell me to leave them alone , becuase I'm ugly . And how can I be friends with couples if no girl ever wants to talk to me . ITs not easy making friends when ure socialy awkward and ugly .Who says I want sex ?why would I go to concerts alone ?

    • Well aren't you a negative nancy. Why ask for advice when you shoot down everything everyone says? This is a place where we give you our opinions. My opinion: don't kill yourself. Life isn't as bleak as it feels because there are things that ONLY YOU can do to fix your own life. I was just throwing out suggestions to get you started. Wish you the best kid.

  • Listen to this. I'm 27 and have only just found a guy who is interested. Before that, nothing. No one had ever been interested in me as a female. No dates or kisses or anything. I guess I just hardened up and started to find my fate a bit hilarious. I stopped caring about all this lovey dovey stuff and convinced myself that I don't want/need a relationship anyway.

    Out of nowhere, this guy comes along and has shown more interest in me in one month than the average guys I work with do in 3 years.

    What's my point? Well, I don't know if I'm a role model for anything. I was never really happy with myself and I would never describe myself as attractive. Heck, I still don't believe a guy could actually like me. But it seems to happening and I want to see how it goes.

    Give yourself time. Concern yourself with other things in your life. Think of it this way, the girls you've met so far don't appreciate you = aren't worthy of you. The right one will come along. It may take years...but when you do meet her, think about all the conversations and things you'll do together.

    Ending it all before it happens would be a total rip-off..

  • Well if this is a real question and not just ... Bullsh*t here is what I have to say

    I nor we can tell you not to kill yourself. You have to want to live your life for yourself not for anyone else. I can't tell you you will have a girlfriend or a girl will want to be your best friend because I don't know the future. However what I so know is no one will want to be your friend if your depressing as this all the time. I know I use to want to kill myself when I was a teenager but I had to put all of that aside and learn to love myself for exactly what I was ME. I'm bot here for everyone else to love me or like me I have to love myself and that is something you need to learn.

    I may sound harsh but I'm not going to be here like oh poor baby because what does that help? Love yourself no one can love you if you don't love you first.

    I know one thing tho obviously you want to live if you are asking whether or not you should end everything. It doesn't have to be the end make it a beginning.

    • will my face turn from ugly to good looking if I'm happy ? no

    • There is always someone who will think your beautiul everyone is so consumed in their looks in this world it's ridiculous. If you think your ugly I'm sorry to hear that but I can't help you with your feelings about yourself but hey I get it everyone wants to be loved right. But still how can you expect love if you don't even like yourself?! Someone days you're beautiful you day oh no I'm ugly. You would always think someone is lying. And that's a problem well we can't solve that for ya. Up2U

  • Love needs both pay, maybe he is not ready, let us with a normal mentality to the face of love, do not give each other pressure, such love can last longer, bless you

  • No girl will ever make you happy.. only Jesus can.

    God is Love.

    Know that you are unique and there is no one like you.. love yourself first before you can love someone else.

  • I don't know if I'm going to regret this, but here's my two cents.

    "Personality dosnt matter unless the guy is good looking."

    Heck no.

    Honestly? My best friend, and the person I'm most attracted to is one of the least attractive looking people I've seen. He's not funny, he's shy and isn't a natural leader, he doesn't even work out, and pretty much until this year, and I've known him for four, he's had no natural confidence. But despite that, he's had two girlfriends, and I love and respect him.

    You know why?

    He's learned to respect himself.

    I've stayed friends with him solely because of that factor, because it's very hard to respect someone who has no respect for himself. And this goes for you.

    It's true, I'd rather be in the company of someone who had a lot of good qualities. But you know what? I have a lot of respect for the guy who says, "You know, I know I'm not perfect, I'm ugly, I'm not good with girls, and I'm depressed, but I honestly want to make my life better, and even if I think I have nothing to work with, I'm going to try my best." Because you know what that tells me? He's starting the change from the inside out. He's humbling himself by admitting he has faults, but he's also displaying self respect by not depreciating himself like you do. It shows he has inner hope and that he can rely on himself and not a gym, not good clothes, to try to be a BETTER person, not a more attractive person, but a better person. And this is what matters most.

    I know you think otherwise. Personality doesn't matter if it's the hottest guy on earth, but you know what's a bigger turn off than ugliness? The classic, "I'm hot, I know it, and I don't need to have personality to get a girlfriend and get laid" personality. That's what you're trying to get, and that's not going to really make you happy. It'll make you happy, but not the content feeling you get when you're with people who really love you from the inside out and you're just so thankful that you exist.

    You need hope. You need self respect. You're not growing even with the gym and the nice clothes because all you want is respect from a female, but honestly. You're not going to get that respect until you respect yourself. I can almost guarantee that.

    So now I'm going to bash on you, because I know I'm not completely fair, and I know I'm not a sympathetic person, and you deserve to stand up for yourself, so do it.

    I'm not going to keep you from killing yourself. I'm not a sympathetic person. I've heard dozens of fake threats like that, I've had people pretend to kill themselves to see what would happen.

    It gave them nothing.

    Do things for yourself, and not for what others may or may not give you.

    You are fully capable of becoming a kick ass guy, and no one can stop you from doing that but yourself. Move forward. Do kind things for others without expecting ANYTHING in return. If other people brush you off, or disrespect you, smile and move on. You can do this. Stop making excuses for yourself.

    • you might be right that I may chicken out of it , but if girls call me ugly behind my back (ive heard it , and my friends have told me ) and I have no female friends ever . my mother hates me becuase I'm ugly . my sister doesn't like to talk to me since I hit puberty and my ugly face started showing . I have no family to support me , and very few male friends who will abandon to hang out with girls . People never do anything for me , and I try to help but not anymore . How can I respect myself whe

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    • any clubs you suggest I join ? I have no talents at all

    • Joining a club isn't about a talent you're trying to showcase, it's about being with a group of people that share an interest that you have. Sometimes people with the same interests have the same kind of personality (And sometimes not). What are you interested in? What do you spend your extra time on, or wouldn't mind spending your extra time on? List as many as you can, and be as detailed as you can. I can't very well recommend anything based solely on the fact that you don't like yourself.

What Guys Said 3

  • mate if you think your position is bad, and your only 20, I am 30 never had a girlfriend or sex for that matter. your still only blady 20 years old for god sake, you have your whole life a head of you. having a girlfriend is not everything in life. you should be thinking of get yourself through college and getting yourself a good job. I am now starting to study medicine and life is going great for me, because I changed my way of thinking. I am going to send to some inspirational video that keep motivated and inspired, and also think about what these guys are saying. there is a lot of truth behind them. I listened to them everyday, and they have worked for me. Life is all about attitude and self belief.

    watch these videos and be inspired, and get back up. and say I can get want in life. life is choice, you can be a warrior, a victim or a fool. a successful bodybuilder, that never had parents and throwning from foster home to foster home. If he can do it, so can you, Rocky is pretty much teaching there's a right road and an easy road. The son was rebellious, he was only thinking of himself, his image. So often people think more about their image than their personality. You shouldn't care? what people think of you personally, but ethically. People like other people robbing their dignity(only focusing on their image, rather than who they are).. If you don't believe in yourself, you will be cruel, selfish, and bad.Some people think life is given, when it is earned. Good things take time, they don't come all at once. When people fall or let others treat them like sh*t, they blame the people that love them the most. They let others define who they are, but themselves. As a result, they hurt the ones they love. They respect the ones that hate? them and disrespect the ones that love them. Rocky is a humble character and was making the point to his son that he is "self-centered" and living a fake life.

  • I won't pretend to say that I understand what you're going through right now, but looking for a relationship will not solve the problems that you are going through. A relationship can only bring temporary joy and if you depend so much on that one person for happiness, it puts a lot of pressure on her. Before searching for a relationship, focus on how to live independently first. If you cannot be happy with yourself, how can anyone else be happy for you? As you learn and develop into an independent individual, you will spark the interest of some girls because they will see a man who they can lean and depend on.

  • You know what, man? I can entirely understand where you are.

    I was there, maybe not to the same degree, but I was beating myself up nearly everyday, because I thought people didn't like me. Not just girls, but I didn't think anyone liked me.

    I thought I was ugly - I thought I was worthless.

    I'd cry when I came home from school, and I'd just shut myself away.

    And that feeling still returns on dark days.

    But overall, I'm so much more happy now.

    I stopped letting my self-pity get in the way.

    Getting better, it's not about finding someone to be better with; rather, it's about finding a way to be better to yourself.

    By society's standards, I'm ugly. I'm out of shape.

    And I can fix that last part, but for me, It's about trying to become more healthy for my own life. Not to be more attractive.

    I don't think I can do anything for you, Anonymous User.

    You want girls to like you.

    But the thing you need to work on is liking yourself.

    And honestly, that's not an easy thing to do.

    It's a bumpy road. It's an awfully bumpy road, with many u-turn opportunities.

    But it's utterly doable.

    And, the reward - the reward would be worth taking that road a hundred times.

    Do you want to know why it's important to learn to love yourself? Because once that happens, there's that confidence - that guarantee: "If I can learn to love myself, then surely someone else can! "

    If you can go from not respecting yourself to loving yourself, then surely someone could go from meeting you, and first impressions, to caring for you.

    The world's not entirely shallow; there's a plethora of people within this atmosphere that are willing to care for someone, based solely upon their insides, upon who they are.

    But if you let this sense of hopelessness invade you, people are going to see it - It's amazing how many people knew I was depressed back then, despite my best attempts to cover it up - they could sense it, and to be honest, I don't know anyone who's attracted to that. But, once I learned to be open to myself, I felt like the world began opening up for me.

    "Learn to love yourself and others will follow."

    That's been said before, but it's vital for people like us to know.