Do guys feel remorse for the "disappearing act" when its a good girl they're doing it to?

I don't understand it. And I'm confused as all hell. He wanted to date me and then after the first night tells me he doesn't have a lot to invest because he's still damaged. that's fine, I'm not looking to get married. I'm looking to laugh, enjoy his company, etc. All seems well for weeks. and I'm a nurturer to a fault so if there was anything he needed? right. I'm a good girl, which nobody believes exists.

Anyway, there's zero warning that we're going from 60 to 0.

He went from chatting a bit each day to silence. Texts like "you make me happy" apparently forgotten..and he;s the one who sent it.

Its been 5 days and he couldn't be any less responsive if he was dead. Seriously. I tried twice, one of them even asking if he was OK just to let me know... crickets. ( I finally checked fb to see if there was any activity, and there was, so I know he's breathing).

But, I've never been the kind of chick who freaks out, stalks or chases a guy... so, unless he finally gets back to me, I won't know what the hell happened.

I just can't stand that its got me second guessing myself.. I'm not insecure at all, and I'm not overly emotional. I'm honest to a fault and I think I deserve that in return..

but, what is he thinking? and is this normal? because I've never been in this position and I have no idea what to make of it.

some people think its him just pulling away because its too comfortable and because he was hurt in his last two relationships. well, I've been solo for two years because of how hurt I was in my last relationship so I get being "scared" and feeling vulnerable.. but I'm totally at a loss as to how I didn't get so much as a mindless text saying "yeah, I'm all set" or... something. anything instead of nothing.

I know that girls/guys think differently and I know that we are the emotional ones...


Most Helpful Guy

  • I wouldn't pull a disappearing act on a good girl. I would think any guy that does, clearly doesn't feel bad enough to talk to her about it so they can't feel too bad about it.

    • you wouldn't do it to a good girl...but does that mean you have done it? and if so, would you tell me why or what you were thinking? did you think about her at all afterward?

    • I have never done it before. If the woman was mistreating me, or acting crazy, I can see myself pulling a disappearing act.

    • I definitely wasn't mistreating him in any way. In fact, some of the random thoughtful things I did caught him by surprise and he found it "sweet".

      can a guy psyche himself out if things seem to be to good?

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What Guys Said 4

  • This is not definitely normal. It seems like he's not interested in you anymore. You're better off without him. You also need to tend to your happiness.

    • I know I am. Even if he comes back around, who's to say he won't just do this again? Its just strange and unexplained.

  • Remorse is a rare occurrence to some guys. I only feel Remorse if a Girl Leads me on an Doesn't give me Any Ass.

  • no not really for me but thts not all guys =D

  • Ha ha! No, no, guys don't feel remorse when they get the hell out of a relationship.

    It doesn't matter if it was a good girl or not, since 9 times out of 10, the issue wasn't with the girl in the first place.


    • I didn't think so. That's the difference right there. We feel bad about hurting someone's feelings. This guy has whatever issues he has and I'm assuming immaturity is just the basics. He probably just didn't know what to say or how to say it so he took the cowardly way out.

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