What are you supposed to do when someone stares at you?

If you're interested in them? I don't know how to show interest. I'm so awkward I'm barely getting used to meeting new people and talking to people in class.

I hate being stared at. It makes me so nervous. So this guy in my class would stare at me a lot during class. He sits on the other side of my table. Since the first day, he would constantly stare. It would make me feel uncomfortable and kind of annoyed so I would pretend I wouldn't notice. When I would walk by him during lab, he would pass by and look me in the eyes.

A couple of weeks later , I started to see that he's a very smart and interesting guy. I started to take interest in him but I wouldn't make it obvious. I would just glance at him here and there during lab. Sometimes he would look back so id look down. After a while, he started to pass by me more often but he wouldn't look at me anymore. He just looks down.

A few days ago, out of nowhere he talked to me. He asked me something about class. At the end of our lab, I took advantage that he was alone so I went up to him to ask him how to do something. He looked surprised but he smiled and kept looking at my eyes and he helped me.

Lately, he just doesn't stare as much though. He will glance once in a while during lecture but that's it. He doesn't stare. And he won't make eye contact when he walks by me. He ll look at he floor, even though he passes by pretty close to me and pretty often. I guess he started acting that way since I started to look at him more. When I went up to talk to him, it looked like his face lit up and he was happy I went to talk to him. But idk.

It seems like he lost interest. If he even was interested. I don't know why he stopped staring. Is it because I didn't look back? What I exactly am I supposed to do when being stared at?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Always amazed me that women ignore guys that are interested in them and can't figure out why (not aimed at you personally - just a general observation of many similar questions on this site).

    And yeah, he doesn't think you are interested in him. So in order to salvage what's maybe left of his interest in him then you are going to have to take matters into your own hands (if you are still very much interested in him, still).

    You are going to have to take the initiative to talk to him for a couple of minutes, direct that conversation into personal matters and then get him on an instant-date over coffee ...if he's interested in you then he's probably not going to say no to coffee with you.

    If you are too late to salvage what could have become a relationship between you two, then he'll decline (or he could still decline if he still doesn't think you are interested in him despite you talking to him)

    • I think a lot of people on this site are shy which is why we have a harder time showing interest. If I could, I wouldve shown interest or tried to talk to him sooner but I start to worry that maybe I'm imagining things and he's not interested, or other things like that.

      Well, I started to look at him during lab and he caught me a few times and that's when he stopped staring as much. He glances every once in a while and he puts his things close to my side of the table, even his binder which h

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    • aMuse is pretty much spot on. Your dude seems not so incredibly shy like me; however, I really suggest you take the initiative to talk to him; you can ask him about something regarding homework, then compliment him and see how his body language is and take it from there.

      After all, like you girls always tell us, what have you got to loose? ...well, aside from your ego, pride, self esteem, self trust etc.

      And when you see him next, then initiate convo also; don't let him come to you first

    • This all happened a few days ago. I guess I can just randomly start talking to him. He seemed nice when I went to talk to him. Everyone in that class talks to each other so it won't be so difficult. I love the homework talk! Academics is what makes me talk more that usual. :D I will try this again next week when I see him.

      Well, since I'm not asking him out or anything, I don't have that much to lose. I will try the homework talk. :D

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What Guys Said 3

  • You ignored him, what did you expect to happen? If you're interested in them, you need to be social with them and return the interest. He was being very obvious, and you were being shy I suppose, but non the less serving up rejecting body language. If you want something to come of it, you need to be in it. He's not going to keep coming at you, if you don't express interest.

    • Ok I see. I always do this because of my shyness. Its easier for me if they talk to me first. If they do, then I usually start to approach them. Well on Monday when he came to class, he asked me to watch his stuff and I said OK. He left and when he came back, he asked me about a hw assignment. Later in that class, he was alone so I went up to him and asked him something and he seemed pretty happy that I talked to him. Do you think I still have a chance?

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    • You're right. This happened last semester with this shy guy. He was awkward at first and then he started talking to me and we go along really well. I'm going to try to talk to this guy then. The people In that class all talk to each other so I guess it won't be too awkward.

    • good luck.

  • Seems like he was interested and lost confidence when you ignored him. you're suppose to smile when someone you like stares at you.

    • Oh. But Its so difficult. I tried so hard to make my head turn around but I couldn't. Do you think it helped that I look at him during lab? And that I went up to him that one day? He seemed happy that I talked to him.

  • Whip it out like a boss is always my solution

    • I don't know what that means. Can you explain?

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    • Oh OK. :(

    • :P

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