When is it considered "dating"?

in about a months time span, he has taken me out to lunch twice and paid, we've hung out multiple times although it is usually only at night and at his place, we've made out (but nothing more), he texts me almost everyday (then again there are also days when he won't text me at all), oh and we have a class together so I for sure see him on tues/thurs.

i am so confused on where we stand. it seems that the older I get, the less direct guys are. are we talking? dating? fooling around? just friends? having fun? I have no idea.

is he even interested? or is he just playing the field?


Most Helpful Guy

  • haha the "college dilemma" When I first got to college it was so strange. Most people spend every minute on campus so what constituted a date in high school almost never happened. it was always "want to come hang out." I think the biggest problem all of it causes is this comfort zone you get it. Its like in a lot of my classes I sit by all the same people and sometimes you never introduce yourself you just start talking. 3 months down the road you are practically friends yet you still don't know their name but its just awkward at that point to ask what it is.

    Getting involved with a guy/girl like many do in college has the same effect. You talk everyday, hang out when you have time, do pretty much everything a couple would do. But because no one ever had to say do you want to go to the movies... or never had to ask for a second date. It just like no one wants to be the one to bring up the awkward conversation of what are we.

    He is definitely interested... he is probably just as confused as you... and no one can answer the question of what you all are than you and him. If you feel comfortable enough around him I would just be blunt and say I like you and we seem to get along well when we hang out, I'm just wondering what we are. (and as long as you truly don't.) I would tell him that you aren't pressuring him into being anything you just want some clarification


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What Guys Said 2

  • Wow, I'm in almost exactly the same situation.

    In my case, I'm definitely interested in seriously dating her, or at least I think it's a good possibility and I'd like to find out. I don't know her that well, though, and I'm still coming down from several really, really bad relationships, so I'm being a little bit slow and cautious. I can't tell if she's taking me seriously either or just, um, playing the field. Of course, if she just wanted to be FWBs... I'd say yes because she's totally hot.

    Anyway, back to your question: I don't think there's any reliable way to know for sure yet if he's interested. Hell, he probably doesn't even know yet. And if he is, he's probably not sure how to say it or worse, worried that if he tells you, you'll declare victory and call everything off.

    My suggestion: keep seeing him, keep your eyes and ears open, and see what happens! If he's secretly a douchebag, I'm sure you'll figure it out. Otherwise, you don't need to worry so much :)

  • This is what I would call "seeing each other."

    But call it whatever you want. Titles like "dating," "relationship," etc. have different meanings to different people. Whatever title you give it, it is what it is: texting, class, lunch, and making out on occasion. Until the two of you decide what you what you are and what you want to be, you'll be perpetually confused. Bring it up casually when you see him. It might feel nice to clear the air...


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