+1 y

Why is it still the guy's responsibility to make the first move and initiate contact with the girl?

I hear lot of girls say that it's easier for guys to make the first move because they think that aren't as as worried about rejection. I've heard some girls say that it shouldn't matter if a guy is rejected. Believe it or not, it's equally nerve-racking for us. We're just as afraid as you are.

I noticed most of the girls who think that give ONE specific phrase...

"Old-Fashioned"

I understand if you're old fashioned, but this is a new age, and today we're equal sexes, for the most part. Having a mistress was also common practice for hundreds of years, but I think we can all agree that we shouldn't keep up THAT tradition.

I think I speak for a lot of guys (and some girls) when I say we would much prefer the girl to make the first move. Not all the time, but every now and then. It doesn't make a girl "easy". Believe it or not, quite a few guys find women who take the initiative in a relationship very attractive.

If you still think I'm wrong, think about this; while you wait around for Mr. Old Fashioned to come and ask you on a date, you are passing up a lot of great guys out there who are old fashioned and decent who just happen to be shy, or have never been in a relationship, and aren't sure what to do.

Don't believe the stereotype that only good men make the first move. Just because a guy is shy, it DOES NOT mean he's any less capable of being a good romantic partner. He CAN be just as great as a guy who makes the first move. Just because a guy makes the first move, does the pursuing and chasing, it doesn't necessarily mean he'll be a great decent, long-term, serious, committed boyfriend/husband. He could still cheat, or worse, be abusive.

For girls who still think that it's the guy's job or responsibility to make the first move, start a conversation, I have one question:

If you happened to like a guy who was too shy to make the first move, and you were sure he liked you would you do it, or would you move on and wait for someone else? Even if he was a great guy?

Updates:
+1 y
Also for many years, it was a Tradition for the girl to marry the guy, in which the girl's father forced her to marry, that tradition is long-gone now, but still, why is it still up to the guy to make the first move and ask the girl out?
+1 y
Why do people always say those sexist phrases to shy, quiet, non-outgoing guys, "Be a Man", "Grow a Pair". Seriously those phrases, quotes are so annoying and sexist.
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I hate it when people say "that's just the way it is", because that is not a valid answer.
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Also, a guy can be brave and not-scared or approaching a girl, but the only thing that would kill his chances with her is that he does not know how to do it the right way. Knowing how to do it is half the battle.
+1 y
the other half of the battle is going out there and doing it, taking the initiative.
+1 y
What are other reasons why it is still almost all the time, more than half the time, that most girls feel it's the guy's job to make the first move and ask them out?
+1 y
Overall, why do most girls feel it is the guy's job to do all the work?
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I've heard other girls say if the girl asks the guy out and makes the first move, then the relationship will not be as good or not last as long, that the guy will not take the girl as seriously, why is that?
+1 y
now it's 2010, I'm sure for at least another thousand years or so that most girls are still going to feel it's the guys job to make the first move and ask them out, overall, initiate everything with them
Why is it still the guy's responsibility to make the first move and initiate contact with the girl?
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