Help! I need to get back on track. What do I do?

I'm passing through a rough time over these last weeks.
I get bad grades, I can't seem to focus. I need to get better grades and it's really letting me down.
Also I ignored a guy that liked me and now a friend told him i like him (i didn't know she would do that) and he hasn't said anything he only thanked her when she said it. Now when I'll see him it will be awkward.

1. What do I do to get out of this negative state?
It feels like I have no control, it feels like it is a combination of awkwardnes, embarassement, depression.
2. Would he try to avoid me or simply show desinterested and ignore me?

Could you give advice for both problems? Thank you!

Updates:
No problem! 😊

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12

Most Helpful Guy

  • 1.) Try meditation and journal writing. Take 5-10 minutes in the morning (or any time, for that matter) to sit and focus on breathing, focus on your belly moving up and down with each breath. Don't try and stop your thoughts, just let them come and go, but try to not pay attention to them. Just be still and focus on your breath. This has an amazing effect and will help you feel better, more at ease, and less stressed.

    Also, writing what's on your mind (doesn't have to be proper sentences or make any real sense, look at it as a "brain dump" where you just try and write down all the things that are on your mind. Getting them out of your head and onto paper is like emptying the recycling bin on your computer. Then you can start fresh and feel a little less cluttered.

    2) He might be nervous or not sure how to react. If he got the vibe that you weren't interested before because you ignored him, but now someone told him you do like him, he may be confused or unsure. Don't sweat it, just roll with it... Maybe try and put yourself in a position to casually talk with him or even just give him a smile when you see him, or maybe see if your friend can hook you two up for a date or something?

    Main thing is, breathe! :-)

    You'll get through this, it's normal.

    Check out an app called Headspace if you want to try the meditation stuff. I guarantee that if you try it, you'll feel better. Maybe not 100% all at once, but you'll start going in the right direction. There's free guided meditation videos on YouTube, too...

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    • Thank you so much for your advice!
      I did a meditation session and I really feel better now. I'll do that every day. I hope I can start fresh and be able on focusing on my exams.
      As for the other problem, I'll just let time pass and see what will happen.

    • Glad to be able to help!
      As the saying goes, "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time"
      And time does have a way of sorting things out.
      Hell, in even just a hundred years the problems that seem overwhelming now won't matter in any way, at all! That's always kind of reassuring when life seems overwhelming!

      Good luck and keep your head up!

Most Helpful Girl

  • Before I start, I just need to let you know that it will get better. Promise. Bad days come in waves. (I was taught this by a psychology teacher). I have been there as well. I got good grades all through high school, graduated with honors, and started college on a high, but then my grades started to be terrible. I couldn't focus, I couldn't make myself do homework, I procrastinated, then panicked on due dates, and it really scared me, because I was trying so hard. What ended up being the problem was that added stress in my life provoked the symptoms of a disorder I've had all my life without knowing: Aspergers syndrome. I'm not saying you have this, but many different disorders can produce similar symptoms. ADHD, general anxiety, and several others. It can also just be depression. I say the best thing, no matter what the cause of your problems, is to talk with a counselor or therapist. There's nothing wrong with you, but if you are experiencing challenges, the best thing you can do is talk to someone that is an expert about how to handle it and some coping mechanisms that work for you. For instance, I learned about the best times for me to do homework, because I'm most aware, and ways to focus while doing difficult assignments.

    As for your second problem, I want you to think really hard and tell me both the best case scenario and the worst case scenario. The absolute worst.

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    • Thank you for your response, I really appreciate it!
      The best case will be that he still likes me and talks with me.
      The worst will be that he is making fun of it or looks at me with embarrassment or just thinking his ego is boosted but doesn't want anything to do with me.

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    • Thanks for most helpful opinion! :)

    • No problem! 😊

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What Guys Said 1

  • Wake up dedicated to doing good with your life.

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