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I can't even seem to understand my own attractions?

I'm 20 years old and about to graduate college, which already makes me younger than most other people in my position.

But I can't seem to understand myself. Lately I only find myself attracted to older guys. If I was a guy I would say I just can't get it up for the younger ones. If I find out they are younger than say 23, 24 it turns me off, but even that is iffy. I'm really attracted to guys at least 10 years older. I'm SUPER attracted to this man 30 years older than me right now.

I know that will sound disgusting to you. But I can't help it. It's like my eye only goes out to the older men. And they aren't more handsome. It's just something about them (no, not money). It's even frustrating me, because I'm sure a lot of them don't want a girl so young. But I can't help it, I'm only attracted to older men lately.

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I can't even seem to understand my own attractions?
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