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Ex girlfriend, new girls...I can't make up my mind

I have a dilemma, I love my ex girlfriend very much, I care for her greatly and I would do anything at the drop of a hat for her.

We broke up a while back, she had dated a guy, maybe 2...that doesn't really matter. Anyways I haven't really opened my shell to anyone since our break up 2 years ago. I mean I have, but I don't know its just not the same.

There have def been girls I have been really interested in seeing and taking out and dating and what not but for SOME REASON, I can't figure out why, I keep worrying about losing my ex...

she is my best friend, we argue a lot tho. Sometimes we get along great and other times we dont. I always worry that if I start seeing someone she'll completely just erase me...and I mean its fair because I would never want to mess up a new relationship because of an ex...

Currently my ex and I talk, we hook up, etc...Am I being selfish when I want to hook up with other girls but don't want to lose her? I mean she consistently says I don't want to be with you but then her actions show COMPLETELY different and I just don't know what to do...its frustrating because I want to date other girls but like I said she is one of my best friends...i would never hook up with 2 girls at once, I wouldn't dare hide anything from a new girlfriend, ughh I just am afraid of losing her as my friend I guess.

its a scary thought but I also want to feel love again and I don't think that will happen with my ex because she won't forgive and forget the past...she has def come a long way but like a couple leeks ago I was the blame for all her issues in her life and I just don't want that...but now we're OK and its like OK how long will this last...

:/ I just want to take care of someone, treat them right and be treated the way I treat them...im so confused :/
Ex girlfriend, new girls...I can't make up my mind
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