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How does a person know when another person has feelings for them?

How does a person know when another person has feelings for them? How do you know when it is all in your head? The problem is that I want to not feel this way but I can't seem to quit obsessing about it. I know its wrong. I know it can never go anywhere but I still would like to know if what I suspect is real or if it is really all in my head. It has been more than 2 years since my original post. I still work with this man only now I report to him. Over the course of the last several years I have avoided him like the plague. I don't understand why I feel the way I do when I am around him. However the feeling hasn't changed. If anything it has grown stronger. He is in a relationship and I am married. I keep telling myself that what we have is all in my head. That I must be imagining it. But I am not so sure...he makes a point to mention our trip when all I want to do is forget about it. He sent me a text to wish me a Happy Birthday. He asks me to lunch. He sends me messages asking me how I am doing and if I am OK. I feel a desperate need to cry or run away. Seriously thinking about finding a new job somewhere else.
Updates:
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Here it is August 2012...i am seriously tired of being in this situation. So last week was just kinda bad. I know it's not in my head. It really hit me hard this week. The way he looks at me..

.its a long stare. He touched my shoulder several times when I refused to acknowledge him. I just want to be happy in my marriage. I don't want this.
How does a person know when another person has feelings for them?
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