Okay so my boyfriend is a part time server at a restaurant. We have been together for over a year now. He and I were having lunch the other day and he started telling me what he thought was a funny story about how one of the guy servers at his restaurant likes to playfully touch his butt and/or/has hugged him and kissed his neck. I didn't laugh lol...I was more like "huh"...and I am sure that my head tilting while looking at him said enough. But it didn't sit well with me and so I let him know. I told him that I thought that it was rude. I already knew that they flirted with him and that didn't bother me. But for them to actually put their hands on him didn't sit well with me. He said that it made him uncomfortable but that he thought it was more funny than anything. He didn't feel like I should be upset because it was a guy. I told him that I didn't care if it were a guy or a girl...that I found it rude and did not like it. That was all that I shared, calmly. But he got upset with me about it saying that he thought it was funny, that its not like he's acting on it, and that now he feels like he has to censor his life. We talked more about it after he calmed down and he said that he would tell him to stop. I still feel an uneasiness about it and wanted some feedback from you all about it. What is your take on it? How would you handle it if it were your significant other?
I called him. I could hear in his voice that he felt offended that I kept pushing the issue esp because it was a guy. He could have understood more if it were a girl. He was adamant that its not like he "would ever act on it, I am not gay"..."they would never force themselves on me either". He's been working there longer than he and I have been together, but then he says "honestly I just hadn't wanted to hurt the guys feelings". I still feel uneasy & plan to revisit the issue. That's the latest.