Getting her number vs. giving her yours? (will award best answer)

Question

I think that it's better to ask for her number than for you to give yours.

It gives you more control. It shows more confidence and taking initiative. It's less passive. It gives you more certainty. If she gives you her number, you know she's interested. Or if it's a fake, you will be able to find out soon.

And for another reason, I doubt many women would call, if they had your number, because despite gender equality, women still do expect men to take charge of things.

Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but this is how I see things.

Agree or disagree? I will base my vote for best answer on how articulate and insightful the answer is - not just on whether I agree with it.

Answer 1

Anonymous

i agree with you. some girls say that they would prefer to get the guy's number first in case he is a weirdo or something. but honestly if I wasn't interested I wouldn't let him take my number or I would make up an excuse. and if a guy only gave me his number I would probably think he is not THAT interested in me and I would probably not call him.

i think you are completely right. girls do like a guy who takes charge and calls.

however, I do hate that trick where they call you on the spot so "you can have my number too" guys do this as a test to make sure you did not give them a fake number, but honestly it is just embarrassing. one time a guy did this to me and I had written down a fake number because I didn't think he would try calling, so then I got trapped into giving him my real number to save my face, and afterward I just ignored him and he stopped texting me after 3 tries.

just ask for her number, worst that can happen is that it won't be real or she won't answer if you get it.

it's just like waiting for a guy to call and not knowing if he ever will.

even if I am interested in a guy and he takes my number, it makes me happy, but I expect that he won't call and if he does it becomes a pleasant surprise. because I have met guys who ask and never call. it sucks. so both of us have worries.

you have to worry that she gave you a fake number or something, and I have to worry that you will never call and I got my hopes up for nothing.

React

tadpole25

+1 y
1. yeah, by getting her number, I can most likely rule out the possibility she's not comfortable with me having the option to call her.

2. yeah, another guy on here suggested to immediately call to make sure you have the real number, but spin it as a joke. sounds like an interesting idea, but I wouldn't do it personally.

3. I agree that it makes sense of have no expectations after you swap numbers, whether you are a guy or a girl. nothing is for sure, until the 2 people actually meet up.
Opinion Owner

+1 y
1...either that or she gave a fake number but either way you will find out soon enough. but if she gave you a number and seemed interested in the conversation she is probably interested.

2. yes it is reassuring and a lot of guys have done this, to me and to my friends. the guy I'm dating now did this to me but in his case I was glad he saw that I gave him my real number.

3. yes. the early stages of dating are like a storm, so many obstacles to pass.
tadpole25

+1 y
when it comes to fake numbers, to me, I would only ask for a girls number if I truly feel that the conversation went really well and there is some interest. I wouldn't ask for the number just for the sake of getting one, becuase that is what leads to fake number or people think they are being more polite by slowly fading away.

Answer 2

tadpole25

1. yeah, by getting her number, I can most likely rule out the possibility she's not comfortable with me having the option to call her.

2. yeah, another guy on here suggested to immediately call to make sure you have the real number, but spin it as a joke. sounds like an interesting idea, but I wouldn't do it personally.

3. I agree that it makes sense of have no expectations after you swap numbers, whether you are a guy or a girl. nothing is for sure, until the 2 people actually meet up.

Answer 3

Opinion Owner

1...either that or she gave a fake number but either way you will find out soon enough. but if she gave you a number and seemed interested in the conversation she is probably interested.

2. yes it is reassuring and a lot of guys have done this, to me and to my friends. the guy I'm dating now did this to me but in his case I was glad he saw that I gave him my real number.

3. yes. the early stages of dating are like a storm, so many obstacles to pass.

Answer 4

tadpole25

when it comes to fake numbers, to me, I would only ask for a girls number if I truly feel that the conversation went really well and there is some interest. I wouldn't ask for the number just for the sake of getting one, becuase that is what leads to fake number or people think they are being more polite by slowly fading away.

Answer 5

dodgersmom11

Xper 4

I would happily give a guy mine first, for the same reasons you said you would give a girl yours. I don't think it really matters. As long as both numbers are given, otherwise there may be some awkwardness.

I would also happily call or text a guy first.

React

tadpole25

+1 y
You mean that I said I prefer to receive a woman's number, rather than giving her mine.

Answer 6

tadpole25

You mean that I said I prefer to receive a woman's number, rather than giving her mine.

Answer 7

guy532

Guru

I've thought about this a lot too and you can argue either way. You pretty much summed up why it's better to take a girl's number so I won't go over that. The thing that I like about giving my number to a girl is that the ball is in her court. If she finds you interesting she'll call, if not then you're not getting a call. Sure you get less responses than the other way, but there is no guesswork involved and no timewasting since you know for a fact that she is interested. If the girl seems shy I prefer to give her my number since shy girls are more difficult to read and it'll save me a lot of guesswork, time, and effort.

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Answer 8

jesoer

Xper 4

Give her your number and then have her give you a missed call :) That way it will not be a fake number, and you can learn if she is interested in you or not. :) That's what I like to do because I like equality in most aspects but I also like being able to take the first step, but still give her the opportunity if she wants to so she can feel more comfortable :).

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Answer 9

InvisibleKid

Xper 2

give. once they call you just know they are down for it.

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Answer 10

ch3ybaybay

Xper 4

I think its better for a guy to ask for a girls number. Most girls prefer that, some girls will still call or text you if you were to give you theirs if they're interested but I think most still prefer a guy asking for thiers.

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1 Person

Answer 11

Anonymous

I agree:D

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