Do I sound shy and timid?

I am shy and I am afraid to dance in front of people. The reason is because I feel like all eyes are on me and I am being watched. It feels so uncomfortable. I am also afraid to perform, give a speech, and a presentation in front of multitudes or even a small number of people. I have stage fright so my body trembles uncontrollably and my heart beats very fast. And because of this I make up excuses to hide in the restroom. I don't have confidence or bravery. If only there was a way I could conquer my shyness and stage fright. What would be the audience's reaction? What if they criticize me or make fun of me? I don't want to make a mistake or make a fool of myself.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You sounds pretty normal to me... according to studies people are generally more afraid of giving a speech in front of a crowd than they are of dying!

    Courage doesn't come from being super brave and powerful.. it's a muscle that you can build slowly over time.

    And we build courage and comfort through practice and baby steps.

    I'd recommend two things...

    1) Research the topic of shyness and learn as much as you can about it. I've found that shyness is mostly an issue of the ego. Our ego becomes so overly concerned that it'll be challenged that it makes us too scared to learn what other people think of us. It feels safe to live in our inner world and cocoons, but it's unhealthy and it breeds a lack of perspective.

    People who are boastful and overly arrogant have the same disease as people who are overly shy... they are WAY too concerned with what other people think of them, except they approach the solution from a different angle. Shyness and arrogance are both poor solutions, obviously.

    Ultimately the healthiest solution is probably to slowly and constantly challenge our ego... and by letting ourselves be open to the criticisms of others.

    There is a magic place in our heads and hearts where we accept who we are and are willing to take responsibility for what we believe about ourselves, and what we do with our lives.

    People tend to either measure themselves against the world, or they measure the world against themselves.

    I recommend making your own decisions about yourself and measuring the world against yourself. Basically nobody knows what it's like to be you, so their opinions of you don't matter.

    Only when we don't care about the good and bad opinions of others can be free ourselves to think for ourselves.

    This doesn't mean other peoples perspectives aren't valid... it's important to pay attention to the results we're getting when we interact with others... but you'll find the MOST personal power when you don't care what others think about you.

    And to get good a public speaking you can take tiny baby steps. Maybe by video taping yourself making your speech, or a weekly video blog?

    Do tiny things that challenge your comfort zone, that's how you get comfortable with the big things.

    Be patient, love yourself as you are, and take it slow!

    ~ Robby

    (My Blog )


Most Helpful Girl

  • I have a soical anxiety issue if I'm around too many people I dont recognize (notice I didn't say know)
    but girl let me tell you I'm almost 30... FUCK IT... Excuse my mouth but you heard it before lol
    dont worry about other people don't worry about making an ass out of yourself I promise you you will do it once in your life at least I do it like every other day don't worry if some people don't like you I promise you not everyone will I'm a very hated person cuz the people I do know I am 100% honest with but i guess that classifies you as a bitch lol I don't hang out with a friend of mine anymore but we still talk all the time and Trust and Believe We Make fun of each other just have fun in life and enjoy it now baby girl cuz it only gets worse (bills, college, hubby, kids lol) don't worry about none of that... so go out there and dance your little heart out as if no one in the world is watching...


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What Girls & Guys Said

  • Sometimes it is better when people see modesty in woman.

  • Don't think what the people think of you, think what you think of them


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