Why is it a mistake to remain friends if you like the girl?

Question

Answer 1

Xper 6

Is not the same. I had a friend. We both did a lot stuff. We set day and I pick her up and we hang out we talk a lot different topics. This was 4 years friendship. Started in 2012 to 2014.

Every year started to get feelings. I even cook at her parents home. Their parents literally love me I mean they even asked me if I was going with her to some place or when she was going to a party their parents always tell her call him. I answer and show up. You see can their parents wide smile.

Until, I decided to ask her. She said "no". I tried stay as friends but it wasn't the same. Slowly start to put busy. Next thing you know few month later she had a boyfriend. Once she had a boyfriend I move on.

Years passed by. In 2018 she kept my number and called me how she was in a relationship but not so well and married with a baby. After awhile talking. Hang up and said "oh well 🤷‍♂️ and thank you God cuz I own a business I don't know what type of life path will be if stayed with her, I am glad she said no".

I learned since then not to have friend zone.

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Walt832

1 y
Sorry wasn't 2012 it was 2010 is when I start in college.
Asker

1 y
That doesn’t sound to bad. At least you had a friendship before you made a move. In my situation she was just using me for attention or just to have someone to talk to. She never wanted to hang out

Answer 2

Walt832

Sorry wasn't 2012 it was 2010 is when I start in college.

Answer 3

Asker

That doesn’t sound to bad. At least you had a friendship before you made a move. In my situation she was just using me for attention or just to have someone to talk to. She never wanted to hang out

Answer 4

jestergent

Xper 5

Because they already made their decision about you. You are now their backup when they hit 30. You'll hit 30 and won't like them anymore. It will reverse and feel weird unfair but at the end your feelings for her are meh by then. It's about you. Make sure you find your equal. Don't let someone use you as a sponge bob. Love doesn't require effort to get. It gets thrown on your lap. Smacks you in the face. And at that time when you identify someone who is in love all over you then you decide at that moment if she is the one. You don't allow friendzone ever. Reason is you are left dry. She finds another guy when she wants and she will (WILL) pick you up when she hits the wall and you don't want that. You want to trade your security of your entire life (marriage) for a woman's good years when she young. That is the full path and that is why as men get older there's less options worth marriage because we want good years left. We have to qualify as player when younger to be okay with someone age 35 when older or she picked us when she was young.

But this is old fashioned thinking too can just be opinion.

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Asker

1 y
This is a great way to look at is. I knew it was a mistake to stay involved but I kept answering her text. I didn’t get what I wanted which frustrated me. She kept texting me but wasn’t interested in anything. Long story short we don’t talk anymore and there is resentment on both sides
jestergent

1 y
I have really good news for you. Every single woman you met in their 20s you won't want them about 30-35. It's a truly dumbfounding experience bc you think you'll always want till you get older. Then when women 25-29 want you it just drops off a cliff and you say I'm okay I'll just date later 20s bc they don't have kids and the above I said.

It's a teeter totter in my experience. You have a hard time in 20s. They have a good. Then older it switches. It just happens. I prefer 20s bc had more energy but whatever it's a nice gift.

Answer 5

Asker

This is a great way to look at is. I knew it was a mistake to stay involved but I kept answering her text. I didn’t get what I wanted which frustrated me. She kept texting me but wasn’t interested in anything. Long story short we don’t talk anymore and there is resentment on both sides

Answer 6

jestergent

I have really good news for you. Every single woman you met in their 20s you won't want them about 30-35. It's a truly dumbfounding experience bc you think you'll always want till you get older. Then when women 25-29 want you it just drops off a cliff and you say I'm okay I'll just date later 20s bc they don't have kids and the above I said.

It's a teeter totter in my experience. You have a hard time in 20s. They have a good. Then older it switches. It just happens. I prefer 20s bc had more energy but whatever it's a nice gift.

Answer 7

mindNsoul

Explorer

It can ruin your friendship
It can ruin future relationships if you fell out with your so called friend or if she decides she wants you now
It makes you emotionally unavailable to really fully seek relationships
Other women might be put off by your friendship and deem it 'red flag' or uncomfortable or think you two are a couple. So even if they like you they won't express it.
Your emotions don't matter and she is using you as an emotional pillow. Or whenever she needed a favor let's say moving apartments, fixing stuff, carrying things, or a ride
It hurts seeing her in the arms of other men and being intimate with someone else right in your face, under your nose, and in front of your eyes.

So no. Not very smart of you to do so. Your only return out of this bad investment is to continue seeing her pretty face and hearing her voice 😐

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5 People

Asker

1 y
For what’s it worth I don’t see her pretty face or hear her voice because she keeps everything to text and we never hang out. I honestly don’t think we were friends in the first place. I was just some guy.

Answer 8

Asker

For what’s it worth I don’t see her pretty face or hear her voice because she keeps everything to text and we never hang out. I honestly don’t think we were friends in the first place. I was just some guy.

Answer 9

Anonymous

It could end up damaging the friendship.
I was in this situation once where a friend admitted they had feelings for me. I told them I didn't feel the same way and they wanted to forget it ever happened. But we couldn't forget, as much as we tried to go back to normal things were awkward between us especially since they never moved on.
I think that remaining friends would possibly lead the person to believe they still have a chance.

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1 Person

Answer 10

Curmudgeon | 369 opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Guru

OK, let's face the facts: She put you into "The Friendzone".

Should you maintain the friendship? Is there anything on a non-romantic level that appeals to you about her? Intellect? Hobbies? Professionally?

(A very good sample question to ask yourself here is: Can you ever see yourself doing business with her? Could you see her as your Realtor? Your Attorney? I am using examples from my professional dealings.)

If the answer is YES, maintain the friendship.
If the answer is NO, and you really just want her physically, then politely say goodbye.

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Answer 11

7121uc | 59 opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Xper 6

Women are so weird. I remember I met this girl that I liked. I asked her out and she said, she just wanted to be friends. I was ok with that because she had other female friends and I figure she would introduce me to them. Whenever I would mention that one of her friends was hot, she would get mad with me. I tried asking her out again and she declined me again. She didn’t want to share me with anyone but she didn’t want to date me, that was really annoying. Obviously, I stopped hanging out with her and started dating the girl I’m currently seeing.

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Answer 12

MarvelFan1993

Xper 4

Because she’s going to make her choice that makes her happy to be with the guy she wants to be with. That’s her choice, but you have to realize when it’s time to stop talking to her. Why do you want her friendship anyways? She’s not going to meet up with you alone, she’s not going to talk to when she has a boyfriend in the picture. If you are in this position then focus on yourself and move on. The more a guy hangs around her, the more heartbreak he will feel.

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Asker

1 y
I mean she didn’t want to hang out before I said anything. I don’t even know what we was doing till this day. I tried building a connection but I just was some guy she came to when she was bored or needed attention
MarvelFan1993

1 y
yeah so forget her man, i know that feeling all too well of girls doing that to me in the past, girls like that are not genuine they are a waste of time.

Answer 13

Asker

I mean she didn’t want to hang out before I said anything. I don’t even know what we was doing till this day. I tried building a connection but I just was some guy she came to when she was bored or needed attention

Answer 14

MarvelFan1993

yeah so forget her man, i know that feeling all too well of girls doing that to me in the past, girls like that are not genuine they are a waste of time.

Answer 15

Enochian

Explorer

Ask yourself this, if you like her and she wanna remain friends, do you really want a front row seat to watch her fall in love with someone else?
If the answer is yes... Than remain friends.
If the answer is no... Have some pride and cut your losses. She is just one fish in a whole ocean.. She can be replaced

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Asker

1 y
She is one of the most beautiful woman in the world
Enochian

1 y
Exactly... One of them.. Not the only one. There are millions of them out there.

Answer 16

Asker

She is one of the most beautiful woman in the world

Answer 17

Enochian

Exactly... One of them.. Not the only one. There are millions of them out there.

Answer 18

YHL6965 | 444 opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Guru

If things are clear that both of you are just friends and if it does not prevent you from getting a relationship on your own, I don't see the problem. However, if either of you uses the other (particularly if the girl uses you for attention and then throws you away when she does not need you) or if one of you still hopes for more, it's best to put a stop to this.

React

1 Person

Asker

1 y
Well the girl was doing exactly what you said. I was talking to other girls but she in particular would text me but wouldn’t be interested in hanging out
YHL6965

1 y
Don't let yourself get used like that. Relationships (all of them, not just romantic ones) need some sort of balance to be healthy and if she is just using you, you are bound to feel bad eventually.
Asker

1 y
Exactly I stayed in it so long that I hurt myself and should’ve walked away. Can I ask you if hanging out should be apart of any relationship?
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YHL6965

1 y
Not necessarily, you can just text but if you want to hang out and she does not, it might end up hurting you in the end.
Asker

1 y
That is what I’m saying if I’m texting and trying to make plans but she isn’t receptive why are we texting? It looks
Like I’m just giving her attt
Asker

1 y
Attention *
YHL6965

1 y
Some people are fine with just texting but, if you are not, don't torture yourself by staying with her and tell her that this is not going to work out because you want someone to hang out with and she is not that person apparently.
Asker

1 y
You’re right. It is just weird since we live in the same city

Answer 19

Asker

Well the girl was doing exactly what you said. I was talking to other girls but she in particular would text me but wouldn’t be interested in hanging out

Answer 20

YHL6965

Don't let yourself get used like that. Relationships (all of them, not just romantic ones) need some sort of balance to be healthy and if she is just using you, you are bound to feel bad eventually.

Answer 21

Asker

Exactly I stayed in it so long that I hurt myself and should’ve walked away. Can I ask you if hanging out should be apart of any relationship?

Answer 22

YHL6965

Not necessarily, you can just text but if you want to hang out and she does not, it might end up hurting you in the end.

Answer 23

Asker

That is what I’m saying if I’m texting and trying to make plans but she isn’t receptive why are we texting? It looks
Like I’m just giving her attt

Answer 24

Asker

Attention *

Answer 25

YHL6965

Some people are fine with just texting but, if you are not, don't torture yourself by staying with her and tell her that this is not going to work out because you want someone to hang out with and she is not that person apparently.

Answer 26

Asker

You’re right. It is just weird since we live in the same city

Answer 27

Rory_Pants

Xper 4

Bro, just youtube JessicaJ she will explain the friendzone to you like no one else my friend.. 🤓🤣

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Answer 28

liburnia

Explorer

Because you'll get jealous when she find a guy and you'll feel bad

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5 People

Asker

1 y
This is true. Why would she want to be friends if I like her yet isn’t being a friend?
liburnia

1 y
She doesn't like you in romantic way so she has no problem being friends
Asker

1 y
Okay so if she want to be friends why she doesn’t want to hang out?
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liburnia

1 y
Because she knows you like her and doesn't want to give you false hope
Asker

1 y
Okay so why be friends?
liburnia

1 y
To have fun with eachother just not one on one
Asker

1 y
She doesn’t want to hang out in groups either
liburnia

1 y
How are you friends then?
Asker

1 y
Great question. Only she knows the answer. This tells me there is reason she keeps In contact with me and friendship isn’t it.
liburnia

1 y
Attention she gets from you?
Asker

1 y
That is what I think or she is bored. I honestly feel used.
liburnia

1 y
Stop giving her attention and see what happens. If she stops reaching better for you.
Asker

1 y
I tried that but she comes back. Then I try to make something happen and it is the same thing
liburnia

1 y
The ask her staight what does she want from you. You have right to know
Asker

1 y
I did an variation of that and asked where do you see this going because clearly you don’t want friendship because you don’t want to hang out and this weird texting dynamic we’re doing. She got defensive and it led to an argument.
liburnia

1 y
Just stop answering to her texts. If necessary block her if it's bothering you
Asker

1 y
We stopped talking so the problem took care of itself. She sees nothing wrong with her actions. Let me ask you something. Why would she text me after midnight saying I’m thinking about you? Clearly she likes playing games and fucking with my mind for her own entertainment
liburnia

1 y
Yes, she is not a good person if she's doing that
Asker

1 y
She only did that once but still. She just loves attention. When I think we never had a friendship anyway. I was just some guy that she engages in text conversations with.
Rory_Pants

1 y
Dude, take control ask her out and be 100% crystal on your intentions.. Let her reject you. Move on knowing you have your answer..
Asker

1 y
I did but I didn’t get an answer. She continues to initiate contact but stupid enough I answer
Rory_Pants

1 y
Thats your answer... 🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️
Rory_Pants

1 y
You haven't changed whatsoever. She wants you to change. OK listen, 30 days no contact and focus on your life, goals and purpose. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, look up Jessica J on YouTube and GL..

Answer 29

Asker

This is true. Why would she want to be friends if I like her yet isn’t being a friend?

Answer 30

liburnia

She doesn't like you in romantic way so she has no problem being friends

Answer 31

Asker

Okay so if she want to be friends why she doesn’t want to hang out?

Answer 32

liburnia

Because she knows you like her and doesn't want to give you false hope

Answer 33

Asker

Okay so why be friends?

Answer 34

liburnia

To have fun with eachother just not one on one

Answer 35

Asker

She doesn’t want to hang out in groups either

Answer 36

liburnia

How are you friends then?

Answer 37

Asker

Great question. Only she knows the answer. This tells me there is reason she keeps In contact with me and friendship isn’t it.

Answer 38

liburnia

Attention she gets from you?

Answer 39

Asker

That is what I think or she is bored. I honestly feel used.

Answer 40

liburnia

Stop giving her attention and see what happens. If she stops reaching better for you.

Answer 41

Asker

I tried that but she comes back. Then I try to make something happen and it is the same thing

Answer 42

liburnia

The ask her staight what does she want from you. You have right to know

Answer 43

Asker

I did an variation of that and asked where do you see this going because clearly you don’t want friendship because you don’t want to hang out and this weird texting dynamic we’re doing. She got defensive and it led to an argument.

Answer 44

liburnia

Just stop answering to her texts. If necessary block her if it's bothering you

Answer 45

Asker

We stopped talking so the problem took care of itself. She sees nothing wrong with her actions. Let me ask you something. Why would she text me after midnight saying I’m thinking about you? Clearly she likes playing games and fucking with my mind for her own entertainment

Answer 46

liburnia

Yes, she is not a good person if she's doing that

Answer 47

Asker

She only did that once but still. She just loves attention. When I think we never had a friendship anyway. I was just some guy that she engages in text conversations with.

Answer 48

Rory_Pants

Dude, take control ask her out and be 100% crystal on your intentions.. Let her reject you. Move on knowing you have your answer..

Answer 49

Asker

I did but I didn’t get an answer. She continues to initiate contact but stupid enough I answer

Answer 50

Rory_Pants

Thats your answer... 🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️

Answer 51

Rory_Pants

You haven't changed whatsoever. She wants you to change. OK listen, 30 days no contact and focus on your life, goals and purpose. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, look up Jessica J on YouTube and GL..

Answer 52

Liam_Hayden

Guru

Because most guys do so in the hopes that she will eventually change her mind. They waste time pining for the girl who is not interested and ed up missing out on other, possibly better, girls.

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Answer 53

Anonymous

She will use you for all the bullshit attention she wants from a male without any of the actual benefits of being a boyfriend it’s not worth the headache and heartache to listen to her talk to you about every piece of shit she’s been fucking and how she wish she could find a guy like you and completely ignore the fact that you do everything in your power to be the person she wants

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1 Person

Asker

1 y
This is 100% true. I just went through this. She was just texting me but had no interest in anything but I kept answering so it is my fault.

Answer 54

Asker

This is 100% true. I just went through this. She was just texting me but had no interest in anything but I kept answering so it is my fault.

Answer 55

Anonymous

Because if it doesn't work out you might not have either. Personally i think that's nonsense. If people can't break up and remain friends in my opinion that tells me they were never really friends to begin with.

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Asker

1 y
I don’t know if we were friends in the first place. It’s clear I don’t have a place in her life. We don’t hang out or spend time together. It feels like I’m just some Guy she comes to when she wants attention or is bored. That isn’t something worth having.
Opinion Owner

1 y
Is that all you think you're worth?
Asker

1 y
No but this is the reality of the situation
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Opinion Owner

1 y
Gut feeling just by the way you're describing it it sounds like she's using you. Go out with her if you like. But i wouldn't put too much energy into a relationship with her until you know she's willing to do the same. Just my opinion.
Asker

1 y
She won’t even hang out.
Opinion Owner

1 y
Then ignore her drop her flat. Make her start every conversation. Smile, flirt, and objectify other women in front of her. And be completely oblivious to her prescence. And no matyer what she does don't be phased by it all. This is a power game.
Asker

1 y
The point I’m trying to make is we don’t hang out at all. I haven’t seen her in years. I try to make plans and everything but she won’t come. She text me and it frustrates me because why are you texting me if you are doing this. There is no respect. Either she has a boyfriend or she only hangs out with guys she is attracted to

Answer 56

Asker

I don’t know if we were friends in the first place. It’s clear I don’t have a place in her life. We don’t hang out or spend time together. It feels like I’m just some Guy she comes to when she wants attention or is bored. That isn’t something worth having.

Answer 57

Opinion Owner

Is that all you think you're worth?

Answer 58

Asker

No but this is the reality of the situation

Answer 59

Opinion Owner

Gut feeling just by the way you're describing it it sounds like she's using you. Go out with her if you like. But i wouldn't put too much energy into a relationship with her until you know she's willing to do the same. Just my opinion.

Answer 60

Asker

She won’t even hang out.

Answer 61

Opinion Owner

Then ignore her drop her flat. Make her start every conversation. Smile, flirt, and objectify other women in front of her. And be completely oblivious to her prescence. And no matyer what she does don't be phased by it all. This is a power game.

Answer 62

Asker

The point I’m trying to make is we don’t hang out at all. I haven’t seen her in years. I try to make plans and everything but she won’t come. She text me and it frustrates me because why are you texting me if you are doing this. There is no respect. Either she has a boyfriend or she only hangs out with guys she is attracted to

Answer 63

AlwaysBelieving | 531 opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Guru

Before I answer, how are you referring to "like"? Does that mean how most people refer to it as (more attraction) or what?

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Asker

1 y
More attraction
AlwaysBelieving

1 y
I'm thinking it's because you'll still want to try to get with her.
Asker

1 y
That is irrelevant

Answer 64

Asker

More attraction

Answer 65

AlwaysBelieving

I'm thinking it's because you'll still want to try to get with her.

Answer 66

Asker

That is irrelevant

Answer 67

lemonsmile00

Xper 3

It's not a mistake. It will just be difficult because everytime you talk to her or see her the feelings will resurface and it will be harder to move on.

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2 People

Asker

1 y
I mean everything you said makes it a mistake. It isn’t worth it because she won’t want to hang out
lemonsmile00

1 y
If that's how you see it, then it is a mistake. I just think it's normal but difficult. Not a mistake.
Asker

1 y
Okay let me ask you if you knew the guy liked you would you hang out and still be friends?
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lemonsmile00

1 y
Of course. And I have multiple times in the past.
Asker

1 y
Even if you didn’t feel the same?
lemonsmile00

1 y
Of course. If I like them as a friend and they're a nice person, I would like to be friends with them. It's not like they did something wrong by liking me romantically or being attracted to me. We can't chose who we feel this way towards. It's completely natural and if it didn't bother the guy, it wouldn't bother me at all.
Asker

1 y
Okay I see then you are very mature. I said it was a mistake because I just went through this and it didn’t work out. She tried to make me out as a creep as she wouldn’t come around at all. She didn’t want to hang out. She was distant and cold towards me on different occasions.
lemonsmile00

1 y
Yeah, that happens sometimes. Sorry you're going through that.
Asker

1 y
Thank you for sympathizing. It was a bad situation. Like she wasn’t interested in really being involved with me but still texted me. I’m confused by what her intentions were because she made me feel like a very low priority
lemonsmile00

1 y
She probably enjoyed the attention you were giving her.
Asker

1 y
I thought if she enjoyed the attention she would’ve texted me all day. We occasionally texted and usually it was about nothing. I remember when she had problems with other guys I was her best friend
lemonsmile00

1 y
I'd say just try to move on. She doesn't seem like a good person
Asker

1 y
I’m trying to move on just haven’t been able to. We don’t talk anymore which should help but it hasn’t. I wouldn’t say she is a bad person she just has issues. I apologized to her if I caused her pain but I’m expecting one as well but I didn’t get one. There is no accountability on her behalf
lemonsmile00

1 y
I totally get you
Asker

1 y
You do?
lemonsmile00

1 y
Yeah, like if I were you I'd want an apology as well. However, I'm also someone who doesn't dwell on other people who don't reciprocate the same energy I'm giving them.
Asker

1 y
The last thing you said is huge and that was my only problem. I was really wasting my time on someone who didn’t appreciate me. Sometimes I wonder if she was right because she probably didn’t want to give me the wrong idea.
lemonsmile00

1 y
Doesn't give her the excuse to be mean to you
Asker

1 y
Correct but sometimes we do stuff and we don’t know how it affects others
lemonsmile00

1 y
If that's how you see it
Asker

1 y
Sounds like I’m making excuses for her

Answer 68

Asker

I mean everything you said makes it a mistake. It isn’t worth it because she won’t want to hang out

Answer 69

lemonsmile00

If that's how you see it, then it is a mistake. I just think it's normal but difficult. Not a mistake.

Answer 70

Asker

Okay let me ask you if you knew the guy liked you would you hang out and still be friends?

Answer 71

lemonsmile00

Of course. And I have multiple times in the past.

Answer 72

Asker

Even if you didn’t feel the same?

Answer 73

lemonsmile00

Of course. If I like them as a friend and they're a nice person, I would like to be friends with them. It's not like they did something wrong by liking me romantically or being attracted to me. We can't chose who we feel this way towards. It's completely natural and if it didn't bother the guy, it wouldn't bother me at all.

Answer 74

Asker

Okay I see then you are very mature. I said it was a mistake because I just went through this and it didn’t work out. She tried to make me out as a creep as she wouldn’t come around at all. She didn’t want to hang out. She was distant and cold towards me on different occasions.

Answer 75

lemonsmile00

Yeah, that happens sometimes. Sorry you're going through that.

Answer 76

Asker

Thank you for sympathizing. It was a bad situation. Like she wasn’t interested in really being involved with me but still texted me. I’m confused by what her intentions were because she made me feel like a very low priority

Answer 77

lemonsmile00

She probably enjoyed the attention you were giving her.

Answer 78

Asker

I thought if she enjoyed the attention she would’ve texted me all day. We occasionally texted and usually it was about nothing. I remember when she had problems with other guys I was her best friend

Answer 79

lemonsmile00

I'd say just try to move on. She doesn't seem like a good person

Answer 80

Asker

I’m trying to move on just haven’t been able to. We don’t talk anymore which should help but it hasn’t. I wouldn’t say she is a bad person she just has issues. I apologized to her if I caused her pain but I’m expecting one as well but I didn’t get one. There is no accountability on her behalf

Answer 81

lemonsmile00

I totally get you

Answer 82

Asker

You do?

Answer 83

lemonsmile00

Yeah, like if I were you I'd want an apology as well. However, I'm also someone who doesn't dwell on other people who don't reciprocate the same energy I'm giving them.

Answer 84

Asker

The last thing you said is huge and that was my only problem. I was really wasting my time on someone who didn’t appreciate me. Sometimes I wonder if she was right because she probably didn’t want to give me the wrong idea.

Answer 85

lemonsmile00

Doesn't give her the excuse to be mean to you

Answer 86

Asker

Correct but sometimes we do stuff and we don’t know how it affects others

Answer 87

lemonsmile00

If that's how you see it

Answer 88

Asker

Sounds like I’m making excuses for her

Answer 89

Wise4myage | 1.4K opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Master

Its not in my opinion, because female friends usually other female friends you can hit on.

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Asker

1 y
I was hoping that would be the situation but she won’t hang out which means I don’t get the chance to see her female friends
Wise4myage

1 y
Then it’s time to move on.

Answer 90

Asker

I was hoping that would be the situation but she won’t hang out which means I don’t get the chance to see her female friends

Answer 91

Wise4myage

Then it’s time to move on.

Answer 92

Iron_Man | 4.6K opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Master

Nothing will ever come out of it and she will use you as a venting board for her future boyfriends

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Asker

1 y
I just went through and although it was like this at first eventually it was a bunch of nothing.
Iron_Man

1 y
All women do this to their Male friends
Asker

1 y
So it makes no to even be friends with girls because they are bad friends

Answer 93

Asker

I just went through and although it was like this at first eventually it was a bunch of nothing.

Answer 94

Iron_Man

All women do this to their Male friends

Answer 95

Asker

So it makes no to even be friends with girls because they are bad friends

Answer 96

_DARKNESS_

Xper 6

Because she’ll move on to someone else if the guy doesn’t take my action

React

Answer 97

Ty2020

Xper 1

Because you'll become jealous and feel terrible. Wondering damn I want to be with her but knowing you can't.

Just don't waste your time on a girl or guy who won't reciprocate back. Its not worth it.

React

1 Person

Asker

1 y
Yea I learned the hard way. She was constantly texting yet wasn’t interested in hanging out or spending time together. That made me feel like shit because I don’t know if she was using me or she was just paranoid
Ty2020

1 y
Its really weird how women always ask if you guys can be friends after your break up or like not suited for one another. They just put ya on the backburner like you don't matter.
Asker

1 y
Exactly she saw nothing wrong with what she was doing. I admit I fucked up the whole situation being emotional. The right way to handle it was to stop answering her text but I kept doing and confronted her to see what was going on and it turnt into an argument. That wasn’t my intention but I stayed quiet for the longest and I had to say something. It was weak on my behalf but hey I will learn from this
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Ty2020

1 y
I was like that too. But its okay at least you have learned from it.

Answer 98

Asker

Yea I learned the hard way. She was constantly texting yet wasn’t interested in hanging out or spending time together. That made me feel like shit because I don’t know if she was using me or she was just paranoid

Answer 99

Ty2020

Its really weird how women always ask if you guys can be friends after your break up or like not suited for one another. They just put ya on the backburner like you don't matter.

Answer 100

Asker

Exactly she saw nothing wrong with what she was doing. I admit I fucked up the whole situation being emotional. The right way to handle it was to stop answering her text but I kept doing and confronted her to see what was going on and it turnt into an argument. That wasn’t my intention but I stayed quiet for the longest and I had to say something. It was weak on my behalf but hey I will learn from this

Answer 101

Ty2020

I was like that too. But its okay at least you have learned from it.

Answer 102

reptocarl2

Yoda

It prevents one from moving on and causes problems with future relationships

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3 People

Asker

1 y
Not necessarily. You could still find other girls and they don’t have to know about her.
reptocarl2

1 y
They will find out
Asker

1 y
They probably will but if you are just texting and not flirting I don’t see the problem
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reptocarl2

1 y
It isn’t always about you. Your ex might still have feelings and can’t move on

Answer 103

Asker

Not necessarily. You could still find other girls and they don’t have to know about her.

Answer 104

reptocarl2

They will find out

Answer 105

Asker

They probably will but if you are just texting and not flirting I don’t see the problem

Answer 106

reptocarl2

It isn’t always about you. Your ex might still have feelings and can’t move on

Answer 107

Hunter7754

Xper 6

Its a mistake because you give her the opportunity to take advantage of you since she knows you like her.

React

2 People

Asker

1 y
I know first hand this is true. I’m going through this currently
Yads_Is_Back

1 y
Exactly. Don’t let her take advantage of you. Make her have the decency to respect her own decision of saying no. Did she wanna be your friend before she knew you like her? No? She’s using you. Take it away from her. You’re only making yourself a host to a parasite.
Asker

1 y
We were friends before she knew I liked her but it felt the same. It didn’t feel like a friendship. It felt like she just leaned on me for emotional support. Or she talked to me when she want attention or was bored. We never I mean never hanged out.
Show All Show Less
Hunter7754

1 y
Ditch her homie. She's using you as an emotional tampon.
Asker

1 y
That was at first but it stopped. It eventually went to what I described
Yads_Is_Back

1 y
@hunter7754 👍🏼
Asker

1 y
@Yads_Is_Back isn’t this how girls act when guys like them but they don’t reciprocate that
Yads_Is_Back

1 y
When she’s using you for attention, yes. If she had any decency she wouldn’t do that to you. She should consider that it only hurts you and doesn’t help, but she’s too into what she’s gonna get out of it. You’re only messing yourself up by staying that way. Let the girl go.
Asker

1 y
@Yads_Is_Back how I can be certain that she is using me for attention? That is just how I feel her intentions could be something else. I say it because she text me for the sole purpose of texting when she isn’t interested in anything like hanging out. Also she knows I like her why would she come want to come near me if it could lead me on? I don’t think it is right but I understand why:
Yads_Is_Back

1 y
That’s the point: she’s stringing you along. If it meant anything more then she would obviously make it more and go with you. You’re her buddy for attention from a guy
Asker

1 y
Okay so she gets attention from me which probably boosts her ego but the people she actually cares about she participates in their life?
Yads_Is_Back

1 y
Exactly
Asker

1 y
Okay I wish I knew this before dealing with it for 3 years. I honestly had no clue and I’m so gullible that I believe she cared about me because she said it. I tried to give her the benefit of doubt but one I had to see what she was doing. Long story short we don’t talk anymore and she is playing the victim like she did nothing. I blame myself for allowing this to happen
Yads_Is_Back

1 y
Well don’t beat yourself up about it. We all learn from our mistakes. But now you know...
Asker

1 y
For sure. Thank you for your responses

Answer 108

Asker

I know first hand this is true. I’m going through this currently

Answer 109

Yads_Is_Back

Exactly. Don’t let her take advantage of you. Make her have the decency to respect her own decision of saying no. Did she wanna be your friend before she knew you like her? No? She’s using you. Take it away from her. You’re only making yourself a host to a parasite.

Answer 110

Asker

We were friends before she knew I liked her but it felt the same. It didn’t feel like a friendship. It felt like she just leaned on me for emotional support. Or she talked to me when she want attention or was bored. We never I mean never hanged out.

Answer 111

Hunter7754

Ditch her homie. She's using you as an emotional tampon.

Answer 112

Asker

That was at first but it stopped. It eventually went to what I described

Answer 113

Yads_Is_Back

@hunter7754 👍🏼

Answer 114

Asker

@Yads_Is_Back isn’t this how girls act when guys like them but they don’t reciprocate that

Answer 115

Yads_Is_Back

When she’s using you for attention, yes. If she had any decency she wouldn’t do that to you. She should consider that it only hurts you and doesn’t help, but she’s too into what she’s gonna get out of it. You’re only messing yourself up by staying that way. Let the girl go.

Answer 116

Asker

@Yads_Is_Back how I can be certain that she is using me for attention? That is just how I feel her intentions could be something else. I say it because she text me for the sole purpose of texting when she isn’t interested in anything like hanging out. Also she knows I like her why would she come want to come near me if it could lead me on? I don’t think it is right but I understand why:

Answer 117

Yads_Is_Back

That’s the point: she’s stringing you along. If it meant anything more then she would obviously make it more and go with you. You’re her buddy for attention from a guy

Answer 118

Asker

Okay so she gets attention from me which probably boosts her ego but the people she actually cares about she participates in their life?

Answer 119

Yads_Is_Back

Exactly

Answer 120

Asker

Okay I wish I knew this before dealing with it for 3 years. I honestly had no clue and I’m so gullible that I believe she cared about me because she said it. I tried to give her the benefit of doubt but one I had to see what she was doing. Long story short we don’t talk anymore and she is playing the victim like she did nothing. I blame myself for allowing this to happen

Answer 121

Yads_Is_Back

Well don’t beat yourself up about it. We all learn from our mistakes. But now you know...

Answer 122

Asker

For sure. Thank you for your responses

Answer 123

CatWoman11

Xper 1

Because after a couple of months we get bored and start searching for a different guy. Staying friends for a while is ok, until you get to know each other. But dont sleep on the opportunity when it arrives.

React

1 Person

Answer 124

In_Trance | 2.6K opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic.

Master

because you didn't wanna be friends in the first place

React

2 People

Asker

1 y
I did to get to know her then develop a relationship.
In_Trance

1 y
Friendship doesn't have an ulterior motive. You lied to yourself
Rory_Pants

1 y
Sounds like she opened the door for you to kiss her at one point and you didn't.. So now she sees you as a friend she doesn't have to sleep with. Basically a cat playing with a string when its bored..
Show All Show Less
Asker

1 y
I see but the opportunity was never there to kiss her because she never wanted to hang out and we never had that 1 on 1 situation
Rory_Pants

1 y
Bro, your codependency is tragic.. There's an abundance of women out there that would love to join you in your life.. Just invite them after you've had a decent conversation starter.. 👊🙄
Asker

1 y
You’re right man. This situation wasn’t meant to be and there is someone out there for me
Rory_Pants

1 y
Watch some YouTube relationship advice and get a clearer mental picture of the mentality of this woman.. She is getting away with being a bitch to you with zero punishment. Why stop!!
Asker

1 y
Well we don’t talk anymore so none of this advice will work. I have to apply it for future prospects
Rory_Pants

1 y
I would honestly take the assault charge at this point... I'm done with you!! 🤣🤣🤦‍♂️

Answer 125

Asker

I did to get to know her then develop a relationship.

Answer 126

In_Trance

Friendship doesn't have an ulterior motive. You lied to yourself

Answer 127

Rory_Pants

Sounds like she opened the door for you to kiss her at one point and you didn't.. So now she sees you as a friend she doesn't have to sleep with. Basically a cat playing with a string when its bored..

Answer 128

Asker

I see but the opportunity was never there to kiss her because she never wanted to hang out and we never had that 1 on 1 situation

Answer 129

Rory_Pants

Bro, your codependency is tragic.. There's an abundance of women out there that would love to join you in your life.. Just invite them after you've had a decent conversation starter.. 👊🙄

Answer 130

Asker

You’re right man. This situation wasn’t meant to be and there is someone out there for me

Answer 131

Rory_Pants

Watch some YouTube relationship advice and get a clearer mental picture of the mentality of this woman.. She is getting away with being a bitch to you with zero punishment. Why stop!!

Answer 132

Asker

Well we don’t talk anymore so none of this advice will work. I have to apply it for future prospects

Answer 133

Rory_Pants

I would honestly take the assault charge at this point... I'm done with you!! 🤣🤣🤦‍♂️

Why is it a mistake to remain friends if you like the girl?

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