I also have somewhat anxiety, but its not as severe as you think. It causes me to hesitate a lot and then avoid speaking. Im very good at small talk but the conversation always dies. im always worried if im in people's spaces so that's mostly the reason why the conversation stops and there's a silence. So I mostly stay off to the side being "mysterious" or something (isn't that what girls like?). This is why I've never had a girlfriend. there's a girl at work (im not attracted to her or anything) but I'd like to be her friend. I already know her name but all I say to her is "how are you" and then that's it. even when I have something in mind I want to say I avoid saying it because I want to make the other person awkward or myself awkward. They say in order to become confident, you first have to make yourself awkward. That doesn't make any sense. Then people will know what you are. How about things fall into goddamn place already. Like Jesus fucking christ.