Is he treating me badly or am I really as crazy as he says I am?

Anonymous
Im a little lost and confused and could really use an outsiders opinion, I used to be lesbian, dating women i never had the problems im faced with now, my boyfriend blames it on the fact that i was gay and says that i expect too much and that i don't understand men... i look at other relationships with a sore heart compared to mine. My boyfriend does not say i love you first. When ever we fight he feels the need to call me names and belittle me, when i tell him to stop and that it is verbal abuse he refuses to listen and says that he won't call me names when i stop pushing him to call me names. The arguing has just gotten worse over the months and i just find myself in a pattern. When he gets home he doesn't even acknowledge my existence let alone kiss me hello, and in 2 years i can count the amount of times iv fallen asleep in his arms , yes we cuddle on the couch but mainly because i force that. We have a very large age gap (15 years) and when ever we dont agree he calls me something that leads back to my age (immature, your being a child, stop throwing tantrums) i dont think im a bad girlfriend hell id date myself if i could i go out of my way to make him happy, when he gets home even though we both work the house is clean (he never cleans and in 2 years he has cooked for me maybe 12 times at most) dinner is ready and im there open arms. I just don't really know what to do anymore iv tried to talk to him about the fact that i don't feel loved or wanted and his response is normally you know i love you and if your not happy with me then you know where the door is. I know he loves me but he never shows it. I stay because everyone keeps saying relationships have there ups and downs but lately it feels like i took a wrong step and have been tumbling down. often he gets so horrible with me i land up crying and he'd just walk away and leaves me to cry. Im just looking for someone to tell me if its normal for men and if im the cause? or am i in an abusive relationship
Updates:
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Thanks everyone, needed someone to validate the im not crazy part... really glad i found this site
Is he treating me badly or am I really as crazy as he says I am?
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