I haven't spoken to him in a few weeks, and I see him most of everyday due to our prominence in music (choirs, class) - and when he has held doors open for me I haven't looked back, whenever we have eye contact I look away, etc.
Part of me thinks that this will help him notice me and see that I'm independent and better than succumbing to obsessing over him, but another part gets an overwhelming heart-sinking flush when I think of him and his wonderful self that had once been such an amazing person to see each day.
Facades of laughing and cuddles with him during tired, groggy school mornings, facetiming late at night on weekends come up and make me get a lump in my throat now for some reason; when I do look his way. I think I did love him. Or at least had lust for him - but now I don't even know what we are anymore, I think he likes another girl.
I want to keep ignoring him until he misses me and crawls back to me like I want him to, but part of me thinks he won't even notice I'm being avoidant, the other extreme of being anxiously attached.
Should I talk to him, tell him of my intrusive, labyrinthine fears of his thoughts of me and what's been troubling me/apologize for being rude and ignoring him-or should I leave it be and continue cutting the friendship off? He has to be quite obtuse not to notice me ignoring him since we are/were close, but he could be confused or even not care about me pls give me advice!!
- Confront him and get relief/closure
- Continue leaving my anxieties and ignoring him