What should I do? Okay, to make a long story short, I told a good friend of mine that I have a crush on him a few weeks ago. He told me he didn't?

.. want a relationship, and I guess he didn't like me back (although he had flirted with me prior to that, I guess I was misinterpreting his friendship) and after that awkward and sad encounter at a choir rehearsal, we both agreed that we treasure each others' friendships and will not let this affect it. He assured me that he doesn't think it's awkward and he wasn't shaken by it, but a few days after I resorted to begin ignoring/being almost enigmatically evasive towards him and deal with it by cutting myself off from him and all my emotions tied to him.
I haven't spoken to him in a few weeks, and I see him most of everyday due to our prominence in music (choirs, class) - and when he has held doors open for me I haven't looked back, whenever we have eye contact I look away, etc.
Part of me thinks that this will help him notice me and see that I'm independent and better than succumbing to obsessing over him, but another part gets an overwhelming heart-sinking flush when I think of him and his wonderful self that had once been such an amazing person to see each day.
Facades of laughing and cuddles with him during tired, groggy school mornings, facetiming late at night on weekends come up and make me get a lump in my throat now for some reason; when I do look his way. I think I did love him. Or at least had lust for him - but now I don't even know what we are anymore, I think he likes another girl.
I want to keep ignoring him until he misses me and crawls back to me like I want him to, but part of me thinks he won't even notice I'm being avoidant, the other extreme of being anxiously attached.
Should I talk to him, tell him of my intrusive, labyrinthine fears of his thoughts of me and what's been troubling me/apologize for being rude and ignoring him-or should I leave it be and continue cutting the friendship off? He has to be quite obtuse not to notice me ignoring him since we are/were close, but he could be confused or even not care about me pls give me advice!!
  • Confront him and get relief/closure
    Vote A
  • Continue leaving my anxieties and ignoring him
    Vote B
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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • First off, bravo on the writing. "Labrinthine"? Don't think I've ever seen that word outside of a novel.

    As for your question, he definitely notices the difference and it probably kills him that his decision lost him one of his best friends. You can't help who you fall in love with. He might even think that he SHOULD fall in love with you, but can't (been in this particular situation myself).

    He deserves to know why you're doing this. Tell him it will be hard for you two to get back on a good path. Good friendships become harder and harder to find as you get older; hold on to as many as you can.


What Girls Said 1

  • I recommend you liking someone else, not making someone like you. But that's just my opinion, if someone said they doesn't like me back, why bother? That's just my opinion tho

    • I'm not really trying to get him to like me back, more like being confused and perturbed as to how I should sustain our friendship after I liked him and I am trying to explore other dating options. I just want to have anything but a cold relationship with him, but I do agree that if one person isn't attracted to you then you should move on even though it can be tough!

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