How to handle and overprotective jealous person?

My boyfriend is very jealous. He told me that he would love to put me in a box so he can be sure I'm safe. He meant it metaphorically.
When I text with an old friend of mine he is so jealous and he can't do anything about it. And he doesn't want me to meet any of my old friends alone anymore. But this means freedom to me and I really don't want to cheat on him. I just love to meet my friends now end then.
He know that this is a weakness of himself and he would like to change it. But he doesn't know how. He also doesn't have that much trust in me although I never cheated on him.
At the moment I feel that it gets a little to much because I'm at that point where I would like to go on holiday all alone and as I was thinking about it I realized that he wouldn't like it at all.
Now I feel that I don't have enough air to breathe and I don't know what to do about it.. I really love him but I don't want to lose my freedom completely.

What would you guys do? And do you have any experience with jealous people? Or are you very jealous yourself?
Thanks a lot for your advice:)

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I have seen it in my family. Sister with a very jealous boyfriend. DonĀ“t forget that if someone is afraid that you cheat, he might be a cheater himself. (afraid you make mistakes that he already makes). You should tell him that if he doubts you, he hurts you... and that that makes you doubt him. Introduce him to your friends... do some things together so he can see how nice they are! Then after that he should feel comfortable to let you go and do things with them. If he claims you and you will stop seeing your friends, then what would you do if you ever break up? Jealousy is a disease. Tell him you love him, buy him presents... give him love and make him feel good about himself so he doesn't need to doubt himself or you any longer!

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What Guys Said 1

  • Yes I have had experience from both sides of this fence. I was jealous of my first wife and the was she carried on with her so called male friends. In my opinion she just didn't conduct herself in a manner that set clear boundaries that she was married and it was a friends only think between her and these male friends. More than one time I had to be the one to point out she was not on the available market. So that caused me to feel that I had to be in defense mode most of the time. We are no longer together , largely in part to that reason. I began dating a woman after that that was a control freak much like you have do scribed your BF as being who thought if I spoke to another woman then I must have been trying to get in her pants. I never gave her a reason for her to feel that way of never have her any cause to feel justified in her way of thinking , but all the way up to our splitting up she acted this way. Life is too short to spend it with an insecurity issue person. That kind of person in most cases will never trust who they are with and seldom build a quality relationship with their partner. Best advice is to get out before his jealous ways can become total controlling. Good luck

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