We finally had sex and now he's ignoring me completely. Why?

We met about to 2yrs ago at work. Started talking, going out on dates and what not but never actually got into a relationship. Other than making out nothing ever happened in between the two of us. He said I love you a few weeks in and the thought of that scared me, so I ended things. We weren't on the best of terms but we would still talk sometimes considering we worked together. So about a year ago he got into a relationship and I guess that triggered me to start drunk texting and calling him. Didn't last long though, they broke up aft a few months. Since November we've been talking on and off because he isn't ready for anything rn, all he wants to do is go and get wasted every weekend. I've told him how I felt a million times and I know the feelings are mutual, but again he's just not ready. Which is fine. But two days ago was the first time we had sex, my first time including, and ever since then he's been ignoring me. I know it wasn't the brightest idea but it happened and now I'm here wondering why the fuck he's ignoring me. I would really like to understand.


Most Helpful Guy

Most Helpful Girl

  • Because guys are assholes.

    I'm going to Give him the benefit of the doubt and say he's in his man world and maybe is thinking over how he feels about you and what can happen next.

    Although he sounds like a typical douche who's got a nice girl crushing on him, you deserve better.

    Did you say first time for you? And he just ignores you after? Ugh.

    I might be overthinking and all he could be doing right now is "what beer should I drink?"

    • I just feel like he could be overthinking things because he knows he just made the situation worse. And he doesn't want to hurt me because he does care. He's said it himself, drunk and sober a million times. But at the same time it's in the back of my mind that maybe this is all he wanted after all and maybe this was his trophy, like he got the last word since I broke his heart the first time.

    • I don't know him. You could be right. Or you could be wrong. Either way, don't give him vagina, dont be too welcoming, and let him have you if he really wants you/feels the situation is worse/ whatever reason may be, let him chase you.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Just give him a little time. If he wants you then he will message you but if he messages and mentions wanting to do it again then you should do it but not if it happens a third time


What Girls Said 4

  • He wants to just get laid lol simples, he doesn't like you and just led you on for 2 years lol how could you let it go on that long?, now you've finally put for him he's reached his goal, it's jsut sad he worked on you for 2 years just to get sex lol.

    • Clearly from him saying he's not ready to be with anyone but is willing to sleep with you tells you he just wants sex but not a relationship.

  • He got what he wanted and left. HE'S an asshole, I hate guys like this because the same thing happened to me and it hurts so bad to know somebody would do this. I don't know about you but I feel like Im worth more then to be treated like a notch in a belt. It really makes me angry when guys take a girls virginity like it's nothing. Please don't sweat him or blow up his phone because he's not worth your time and you have better coming your way.

  • Uh-oh : / Sorry girl, I hate to say it, but it sounds like he just used you and now that he got what he wants, he’s not giving you the time of day : ( It’s pretty clear that he was playing games. If he really loved you *which by the way it takes men longer than three weeks to reach genuine, complete love for a woman* then he wouldn’t treat you like this. Sorry girl, but he used you for sex.

    I’ve never actually been in this situation because of the heartache I’ve heard it causes which is why I NEVER have sex with a guy I am not in a relationship with. If he’s not willing to treat me as something greater than a piece of a** then he’s not gaining any sexual pleasure from me.

    • Just fyi don't say it's impossible for a guy to fall in love in three weeks. It's unlikely, but my boyfriend and I fell for each other REALLY fast. The chemistry was amazing. Still is, over a year later haha.

  • He got what he wanted and now he's done


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