I would probably ask a friend to help you process and take a look at the choice in men and see if there's a common pattern. My friend asked me a similar question and i tell them "whelp, every guy that is ready for a long term relationship, you dismiss with "he's too (insert trivial crieria)." - the guys she does pick are one who are unstable. I am not saying that the above is you but as a friend, it was very obvious to me and i watched her do it for 8-10 years. Did i say anything? Of course however... was she ready to listen? Nope and that's okay! There's a time and place when people are open and wanting to examine themselves. - self awareness is key.
Have an opinion?
Depends on the man. Generally speaking, the younger you go the less interested in commitment men are going to be.There's also a lot of guys who never really want to be wirth just one person. Note that these are not universal traits, but it makes sense the the majority has these desires. From an evolutionary standpoint it makes sense. The drive is based on spreading your genes as wide as possible (which translates to wanting to have sex with many different women) while women, being stuck with pregnancy for nine months, feeding (from the days before baby formula was a thing), etc are vulnerable for longer, and have to deal with a helpless offspring MUCH longer than most species, so they're predisposed to seek out a long term partner. Again, not universal, but it makes sense that these traits exist in the majority, or at the very least are extremely common.On what to do about it... honestly you just have to keep looking. If a guy doesn't want a relationship there's not much you can do about it, and you have no way to predict when, or if, that's going to change. Just get that talk out of the way as early as you can manage to make sure you're not waisting your time.
Firstly, good me are hiding scared now thanks to 3rd wave feminists making our lives hard. The act of holding a door for a women somehow makes us sexist.Secondly, long term relationships aren't easy and those who want them are typically very choosy since they intend to spend decades with her. Thirdly, age is hard, many men want children and are biologically programmed to seek out young, fertile looking, slim, women. Fourth, many men are indoctrinated against long term commitment and the fact our hookup culture floods us with easy 20 year old females with little consequences (abortion) is not on your side.Fifth, you may be looking in the wrong spot since good men tend to gather in certain areas and not do good men gather on others you may need to change your strategy a little.I don't know how these general concepts relate to you personally but they may narrow down your search.If your desperate check churches, men who are Christian tend to be in favour of long term relationships, maybe you'll find someone in there. Check Lutheran type churches as they tend to be more inclusive than some other denominations though this varies from church to church slightly.
This was nicely done
You are rather over the hill, older than what I would date. Guys wanting to start a family aren't going to be interested in you. And it is soooo easy for older men who are financially stable to attract women that they don't need to give a commitment to get them into bed.Sure, some guys will marry someone your age. The question is not why some men don't want a LTR, but why some men who are not wanting a family do?What are you offering that a guy can't get from other women without commitment? When you figure that out, then you can go find men who want that.
Because It takes a shitload of work to get good at attracting girls and we want to benefit from all that hard work once we get good at it by finding the hottest girls to sleep with. Jealousy that girls in their 20's got heaps of action easily could also come into it. We feel we deserve to have fun times too before settling down.
Do you have any good reasons we should want a LTR? I can't think of any. I simply cannot take any woman serious enough to think that way. The moment you start thinking serious about one, sht, she will be moving on her backup boyfriend. I think the LTR is dead. Even those that try will be gravely disappointed eventually.
I may be a bit unique here. But im going through a phase of massive self development at the moment. Part of that, is ridding myself of social anxiety. Which entails tossing myself into stressful social situations as often as possible. What more stressful than introducing yourself to an attractive stranger? I don't want a relationship because i need the freedom to put myself out there in order to get passed my issues.
You should find a life partner its gud to have one... and for that you should not sit at home instead you should explore new places, new people... to find your hubby... and surely it will take some time so be patient... dont rush up things... coz god is busy in searching a dimond for you... also have faith in god... i am dam sure u will get someone.. but remember be patient!!!
The older you get the less people of the opposite sex that prefer long term relationships are still out there because they already found one...😑
Well considering you are 40... you are essentially 10 years past the point of no return, sorry you got the news so late but you have hit the wall. men your age or heck even younger are going after girls even younger than them so essentially you are competing against girls whom are way more fertile and chast... we both know you are at a HUGE disadvantage, however if you do end up finding a man, CHEERS!
No clue. You look pretty good for 40 though so I have no idea why you wouldn't be able to get a guy looking for a relationship. In todays society i would say marriage would most likely be off the table except for a very few guys.
I'm a guy and I want something long term. I hate when people play games and can't have the guts to be honest
not every men what's that there are some real men who would love to be in long term relationship with u just keep looking.true love is not easy to find.
that's difficult to say; what's wrong with ya? I think it's safe to say that everyone has a certain amount of baggage to carry with them through life
I mean I've been married once before it ended horribly he put me in the hospital and also cheated on me and had a baby with somebody else and I swore I would never get married again but now after 6 years I really want a partner
Yea... sorry to read what you've been through; I don't see any of that as deal breaker though. Are you putting yourself out there? Marketing is a big thing to finding a potential SO
I don't know you but I get the same problem with ladies and it's so difficult with relationships today with social media and everything. I just want a lady to come home to have a cuddle etc and just be together and happy 😁
It depends on the type you are choosing, for me I would go into a full committed relationship, that is clearly on the road if marriage
Could be because of your person or they just wanted to have sex, or they just did not feel an connection (but this may belong to my first idea)
I don't think that's true, unless we don't see a future with the partner, most of us are for long term relationships
Ehhhh... dunno about that.
We do, i, m in the same boat seem like every girl I date don't want long team, sorry ur have the same sucky luck
I just want a partner to share my life with
Me too, grow old with someone , a cane in one hand and her hand in the other
Guys just don't tend to want long term relationships. It's not you. It's the women before you cause every guy has been hurt and then they decide to just play and have fun.
a cost / benefit analysis shows that long term relationships don't benefit men.
Because you let that train leave the building. There is absolutely no reason - other than legit spiritual companionship - for a man to date a woman in that agegroup. No chance on family, emotional baggage, declining physical attractiveness.
Your not meeting the type of guys you are looking for. try looking in a different venue.
I only go into relationships to that I think will last so very little
most guys do its just it depends on y they are going out with u
We just don't. There are more downsides than upsides, mostly such as a loss of independence.
Too many hoe's giving the good stuff out without being tied down, thats why!
Beacuse there are probably some smallthings you don't recognize, that are a huge turn offs for guy's.
wrong men you're flirting with OR the problem is you driving them away?
Not all men are. Some do, some don't. I don't mind in long term
Because if things aren't getting better they would go down hill
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