Should I tell an adult or should I just stay shut and not risk being humiliated?

So there's this guy and were kinda close and he always buys me stuff and expect for me to do things with or to him and I always say no but the other day we were just laying down watching TV and he just got up and pinned me down to the bed I asked him what he was doing and he said "I'm always doing things for you its time you return the favor" I was really shocked but I couldn't move he started kissing on my chest and stomach area and I told him to stop he wouldn't I really tried getting up but his grip kept getting tighter so I stopped but then he did something I won't forget he put his hands in my private area and I really tried to scream for help but he got on me and covered my mouth and continued to do it then he got up and tried to take off my pants until he heard someone coming towards the room he told me to get up and fix myself and to stay shut about it or else he would tell everyone I begged for him to touch me... this was yesterday and I haven't told anyone in fear that he would spread rumors... I'm 16 and he's 17

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Yes. So perhaps this is not rap, but if he can't stop when told to do so some other girl might get rapped and you have a chance to stop that from happening. Also you indicate that this has been going on for a while 'buys me stuff and expects for me to do things'. To be honest no man has a right to expect a women to 'do things'. You don't buy with money or gifts the attention of women. This guy is plain wrong. And you need to stop being so naive and recognise what is right way and wrong way. You could and I think should have made your boundaries clearer much earlier on. You might have liked his attention but he had made the type of man he is very clear. I'm actually na little angry with you for not being wiser to your own attention. Respect your self because there are plenty of men who will not.

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  • You should definitely tell the police and make sure you say what really happened before he tells the lie, because telling the truth after may make it appear like you're embarrassed and trying to cover it up/get him back for telling. I'd let your parents known first though, but definitely go to the police. They probably won't be able to do anything because I'm assuming it is your word vs his, but at least they will hopefully make note of it and if he does it to other people you maybe able to go after him, since he established a pattern.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You should tell someone—that’s called sexual assult. While nothing can be proven, sadly, if you tell your family or a really close friend, they can help you keep him away or even be witnesses that something started happening, should he decide to do worse and you report it. I’m sorry this happened to you... want me to deck him for you?

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    • Also, keep pepper spray or a small metal flashlight in your pocket—the former can help you in case he tries something again. The latter can be used as something hard to help you hit him more directly and deliver a more powerful blow (which can be helpful when trying to get away). If he tries anything else, scratch him hard so his dna is under your nails, ok?

    • Tysm that's really helpful and honestly I've told someone and they said I was being delusional and that I was lying I set up cameras in my room so next time we hang out if he tries anythings I'll have proof

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • Tell someone immidialty! This is sexual abusive called rape, this happens a lot and girls and even guys tend to stay quiet. Also next time he tries it and puts you in a position where he has the power over you BITE HIM I really recommend it. As hard as you can in his arm of hand or wherever you can bite! The pain will make him stop for a moment that is your change to get out, scream or whatever the option is.

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  • Tell someone urgently, the longer you wait the more the blurry details get. Write down what happened, tell your parents and go to the police with them.

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  • You need to report this at once to the police tell your parents first or some one you trust you have done nothing wrong

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  • You're 16. Stop seeing him.
    Tell him to wait a year or two

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  • Yes. Tell someone. Legally it's not rape, but it could be assault.

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  • Tell someone

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  • It is an attempt to rape

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  • Just shut the fuck up about it.

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What Girls Said 8

  • TELL SOMEONE!!! He is using your feelings to guilt you into silence. That is the worst choice. Tell your mom, sister, aunt or even a cousin. Just tell someone. Just because he gives you things does NOT mean you owe him.
    Also, don't invite him over, avoid speaking with him.

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  • Tell someone you trust like your parents, get to the police and open a case so that this excuse of a dick can't hurt you or any other girl. If you're the first he tried it with, you will not be the last and if he gets away with it, he will do it again. It's rape and sexual abuse.

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  • You've just been sexually assaulted. Don't take that lightly. Tell a responsible adult or the authorities. He'll do that over and over and to other girls too if you allow him to get away with it.

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  • Oh my god.. dear girl. What are u waiting for!!!
    Tell a responsible adult immediately and throw all his gifts on his face.
    You have no idea the kind of danger u are in right now..
    tell someone right this second!!

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    • Don't let him manipulate you, he has no power over you and he cannot do anything to you.
      If you tell someone they will only be disgusted with him for what he's doing not you. You will not be judged.

      I really encourage you to tell someone.

  • Tell an adult asap and make sure to never have anything to do with that guy again

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  • Yes tell someone you trust as soon as possible

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  • That's awful I'm really sorry. And you should tell someone. He can't do anything he is scared that you will tell someone that's why he threatend you. And you need to tell someone asap. He should get karma

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  • Tell an adult. And tell the cops. Its sexual harassment.

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