I don't care about the chase at all. There must be some effort in both parts, if I feel like I am the only one, quote unquote chasing, I will stop having interest on that girl on the spot. Do you know that girl that moderately flirts with you, but doesn't want anything? Why would a guy make an effort for someone he feel's doesn't want him and is just playing?
About losing interest when we know girls are interested. This is the best part! The fun begins now! Why would a guy lose interest after that? I really have no idea.
Maybe it's just me. How do you guys feel about this?
On the other hand most guys say they don't like the chase. Because they feel they are just being played with.
So girls will drag things along to make sure he is what they want and that he wants them, but if they do it too much guys will lose interest to avoid being messed with.
Most Helpful Guy
Yeah, the girls I lost interest in like that tended to be the ones who were being flaky, either playing hard to get or just not putting in any effort expecting me to chase. Or, she became interested but I simply lost interest. It never had anything to do with her showing interest.
If I was single and she didn't show much interest, I'd talk to other girls at the same time. Inevitably one of those girls would end up showing more interest than she did and I'd choose her instead.
One time for example I dated a girl, the first date went pretty well I thought. But then she wouldn't give me a straight answer when I asked her out again, she took longer to reply to texts, I'd be the first one to text and she'd be the first to stop texting me so I figured she wasn't that interested. I got talking to another girl, went on a date with her in the week and at the end of the date she asked me out again that weekend. Why would I choose the other one who doesn't seem to be that bothered when this one is? Anyway, the girl I was with tagged me in a picture and the other girl went mad. I think maybe she was thinking along the same lines as some girls here but it backfired.
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Most Helpful Girl
I personally don't get it either, and hate the chase as well. I personally don't feel comfortable in a relationship until we have the first argument 😂 then it feels real and I can relax a bit.
From my understanding though, some guys need the chase 🤷 it's like a psychological thing, whereby they place value in a girl based on how hard it was to "get her". The easier she is to get, their subconscious feels that perhaps they could have worked harder and so she must not be worth it. Or if she's super hard to get (i. e emotionally, physically, commitment wise) she's a worthy catch because if he can get her then it was an achievement of some sort. This is why emotionally unavailable females, or as guys like to call them "girls with an edge" or "tough girls" are an appeal because the guys feel like they have to break her walls down to get close.
But I think this has something to do with the attachment theory. These guys prolly have had mothers that have acted distant and so they expect girls to be that way, and haven't grown out of the behaviour of seeking the approval of a distant female (whether mother or partner).