Your way of putting it makes sense. Clear and well-explained. I can see why one would think women who do this are immature or childlike.Not advocating for one side or the other, but from my perspective, it seems that women are holding back in order to reinforce their own self-value. This is all inside their head; not for anyone else. Of course, since they are being dated and probably have loved ones, they are valued by others in some way.This might prove inconvenient and could be confusing or unattractive to those who don’t see any good reason for a woman to suppress herself. It’s understandable and perfectly sensible to see it as such.But I think the main thing is that women want to prove to themselves that they are of value, rather than doing it to sort out husband material or play “hard to get”. That is just my two cents.
@enirikiu Interesting introspect, is much appreciated. How would holding back (even if she doesn't want to) reinforce her self value?
@enirikiu I don't think that it is to prove it to themselves. I think it's a tactic that they use to convince the man that she's of value, whether or not that's true. I can understand why they do it, but as a man and knowing what I know I wouldn't fall for it personally. @Jekel6 mentioned "husband material" vs "romantic lover". Women act differently towards different guys. I've experienced both sides of this myself, and I've had conversations with female friends who have admitted to this.For example, I had a female friend who would tell me all about her dating life. She'd had one night stands, friends with benefits etc. She also of course had a few relationships. One day somehow we got into talking about how many dates should you wait to have sex. She said that with the ONS/FWB guys it didn't really matter if she had sex on the first date because it wasn't long-term, but with the guys she wanted a long-term relationship with she'd make them wait at least a month or two. That's the difference between husband material and romantic lover. More rules and more witholding sex from the husband material, less rules and less witholding sex from the "lover". She said that it was because she thought it would make the relationship better, but in reality she was trying to convince (lie to) the boyfriend that she wasn't the kind of girl to have quick sex in order to convince him of her value. It might be genuine sometimes, but it's just a tactic most of the time. If a guy has been on both sides of that though it's easy to see right through it. And then at that point it just seems silly, and this suppression makes no difference other than perhaps making him lose interest the more she tries to do that kind of thing to convince him to like her.
Play hard to get? In what way is self respect playing hard to get? A woman is not a piece of meat.. if they want to “withhold” kissing or sex until 4 dates in then I don’t see why that should be an issue? All that would communicate to me is that I’m investing my time into an incredible person, who I know hasn’t kissed the last 5 men of the last 5 dates she’s been on and would only kiss if she really likes a person.Women don’t navigate dating the same way men do. Women navigate dating from an emotional place, and it can take them time to work out how they feel about a man.. And unlike men, woman get emotionally bonded to a man through sex.. (Men only experience this feeling of emotional bonding with their children.)Forget the woman who give it away easily - they are too much in their masculine energy. Educate yourself a little on how females minds work..
@MayorGoldieWilson You don't see it as an issue because you're naive. Just because a woman makes you wait, doesn't mean that she makes other guys wait.
@englisc Not at all. I’m actually interested in why you see and speak of the opposite sex in such a derogatory way..
@MayorGoldieWilson I don't, I'm just speaking bluntly. I explained why I say this in my first reply.
@englisc I meant the guy who posted the original comment (Jeckel6) , not you. Auto-correct.
Yes and no. I lived in Europe for two years and i agree the girls are more casual and comfortable with their sexuality and dating, it was the best time of my life. There doesn't seem to be the spoiled disney princess mentality in european girls, they're people, stong women, and i miss that. They definitely have quality over American girls. BUT, against your point, most the girls i dated were bi, weren't shy about physical contact, and usually goddesses in bed. Basically, they didn't hold their pussy to a pedestal and the women loved the men, and the men their women. It was more equal mentality and standing from what i saw. And unfortunately, since coming home years ago, the sex has been absolute trash :(
@Jeckel6 Europe is quite different. You hit on something else with your equal mentality. American girls yammer about equality & what not - while so many dress/act like sluts with little to no self respect - but really have no idea what it means. Some European countries men can still be men - they aren't figuratively strung up by their balls for whatever (with the attitude of today soon a man won't be able to smile at a girl in an American bar or he'd be cited for sexual harassment) like they are in America - and yet the women are treated as equal in many ways (jobs, social expectations, etc.)
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I don't think I would ever kiss anyone that I just met, regardless of how great he is. I am just not comfortable with physical touch unless I have feelings for the person