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What are some things that women have a misunderstanding about when it comes to men and relationships with men?
Anonymous
- I'm slightly generalizing here but for the sake of common misunderstandings, I'll just do what I gotta with this. But here's a few major ones.
- When you play hard to get, we assume you're not interested for a very reasonable reason. Why would I continue to talk to a girl that's giving me hints of not wanting me to talk to her? (ex. being left on read by her constantly, she's closed off, etc) It makes no sense to play hard to get because if you're interested just make it clear. I understand you want us to show we're interested but it's seriously annoying and immature and there are many stress-free ways we can show you we're interested.
- That we do listen. We do, but maybe we have other things on our minds, maybe we need someone to talk to about it, or maybe you are often lecturing him or hounding him about something and it's stressing him out.
- We want you to be direct with how you feel, mind games, playing hard to get, and throwing hints for us to see really isn't necessary and it's annoying and makes a guy question if you like us or not. Some might be good at hints but a lot aren't. This also goes for telling us you want something or something like that, being outspoken and direct helps.
- Some guys just aren't the approaching type and is reserved, if you are interested then just approach us instead and break the barrier. Stop expecting us to approach first, some might be too introverted, shy, or a loner, but when you talk to us they are really kind and friendly people who might be interested in you as well. You won't know unless you try.
- If we have trouble communicating to you, there's probably a reason why, so ask him why and talk about it.
- We might also have been hurt before too.
- We can't read your mind. We don't know what you want unless you say it, this goes for humans in general, nobody can read minds.
- We actually have feelings too.
- Most of us don't 'just want sex'.1|50|0Is this still revelant? - Men want a woman who can provide what he cannot provide for himself. The other half of him, the missing half of a complete life. Men don't need a woman who is educated or works, we can get educated, we can work. We need a wife and a mother to our children. Not a career woman, and not just a horny slut, either. That's not who I want raising my kids. I want somebody who will be a good MOM, not a good assistant vice director of regional marketing or whatever the fuck, no matter how many initials she has by her name that she got from Yale or Harvard or wherever. None of that is even remotely relevant to anything, as far as I'm concerned.
I think when a woman is educated and career-driven, it's just a hobby for her. Like a guy who builds model trains. It's not good or bad, it's just irrelevant to anything I'm interested in. It doesn't matter how many degrees you have or how many ladder rungs you've climbed, it's the same to me as a guy showing me all his toy trains.
"Yeah, that's real cool, dude. I'm gonna split though, take it easy."0|01|0Is this still revelant?
Most Helpful Girls
- After we say there is something we want to talk about most women don't realize that men totally shut down or figure they are in the dog house.
Men do need time to think after an argument and trying to keep talking them and convincing them of something is probably not going to work. Give them some space as long as they address the issue in a timely manner.
If you ask a man to do something which is reasonable and you've said like say 3 times don't expect that specific man to follow through if this is a pattern. Nagging him to change isn't going to work. Can't tolerate it break up.
Their brains really do work differently.
They have emotions and can be hurt deeply by a sharp tongue. Some will suffer in silence to the point where it is harmful to themselves.
They need space. Too much space and no attention given isn't acceptable but some is fine as long as they aren't up to anything.
Men need to feel needed. I don't mean we pump them up when they haven't done anything to deserve it or pat their ego but just compliments for simple nice things they do for us. It's a two street on this one though.1|100|0Is this still revelant? - I think the biggest misunderstanding comes from expecting men to be like other women in terms of their thought process and how they respond to things. There's a reason that the idea of male brain and female brain exists.
You can't raise your son like you would raise a daughter, yeah boys and girls are the same as kids but not any more as they get closer to puberty. You can't expect to have a engaging conversation with a date if you talk to him like you talk with your bestie. If you 'care' for him the way you care for yourself, whether it is just to let him relax or actually support him in difficult times, then it won't be the most effective way even if you have good intentions and the effort is appreciable.
Oh and also men love being appreciated. They hardly receive compliments and showing even a bit of acknowledgement for the smallest things can truly brighten their day. It's narratives like 'men don't deserve appreciation for this or that' is a very toxic message in my opinion. Sure, we don't have to wash their feet, but there's a happy middle ground.0|92|0Is this still revelant?This is something many modern people hate hearing, that the differences between sexes aren't just biological but also behavioural and thus requires respective approaches in how they are raised as children and treated as adults. Nonetheless it is as much a fact today as it has always been.
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@AlexanderBrunnrgaard : Doctors after years of research have concluded that yes, there IS a difference, however subtle at times, between a male vs. female brain. And have lost their jobs because of it, because political groups are run by pea brains who can't wrap their minds around the difference between "different" and "equal." So these groups get triggered, and think "different" equals "women inferior," because that's the *only* thing it "can mean."
And the scary thing, is academia who turn around and respect the Tide Pod brains, not researchers. Why? Because politicians and the such hate angry mobs of Tide Pod brains bothering them. So they want to appease them. Or, they are traitors, and need useful idiots to destroy the country. So schools get funded to appease brainlets, not to actually advance real learning.
Ergo, when you make the mistake of actually teaching something true, which all the same offends the useful brainlets, then you become a threat to the school's funding. And so rather than stand by results and have integrity, the schools of today let the mere fear of losing even a little funding cripple them. And that means, Mr. Insight must be fired, publicly disgraced, and blackballed from his own discretion. The modern equivalent of a lynching, or of burning the heretic at the stake.
In this way Secularism has become like the syncretized Pagan-Catholic regions of Medieval Europe. A scientist discovers that a commonly held public belief... is not entirely true? Witch! Heretic! Burn them!
The exact religion employed has changed; but public responses - and how political figures can then manipulate said public responses to destroy intellectual threats to their power grabs - that has not changed in over 600 years.@ObscuredBeyond Only difference I've heard about is relative size that corresponds to the size difference between men and women of equal heights... Men have larger everything, hands, muscles, longer arms... doesn't mean they think better.. Testosterone affects every organ of the body, so of course it would affect the brain. But there are women who have higher levels of testosterone and are exposed to higher levels of testosterone in the womb. Wouldn't their brains be different too? We're all along a spectrum. There are likely men who are womb exposed to higher levels of estrogen. What brains do they have? It's all relative to many factors.
@Screenwriter : There is way more to the soul attached to the brain than mere exposure to testosterone. But what is the biggest difference I've seen, is in how one prioritizes figures of nurture. This affects one of the most important areas - how you choose your preferred teachers. And from there, learning takes over. I tried to get my one niece interested in being a mechanic. But her older sister, who is all princesses and unicorns, would have none of it. So she undid all my teaching, and taught her not to trust me. With my nephews, it's the opposite problem. The oldest is a rebel, and won't stand for me trying to teach the younger ones how to be productive. He's hellbent on corrupting them faster than I can guide them.
@Screenwriter true you can do it at times out of appreciation and love. But I wouldn't do it to any random man for holding the door open for me lol.
And the brain is very complex, I wouldn't just define their differences by the size of different parts of the brain, the hormones or the neurological connections only... But you're right some women do naturally have more testosterone and also have some physical/psychological traits that resemble men. Nothing wrong with it. It is like a spectrum to an extent.
And this is also why transgender people exist. Most of them are cis men with 'female brains' or cis women with 'male brains' which is why they have gender dysphoria and it is actually diagnosable by medical professionals.
What I said originally still stands true for most men and women though.@ObscuredBeyond Stupid peer pressure is annoying... What did the parents say about your encouragement... They could certainly have weighed in heavily. I helped my dad work on our cars and because of that I know a bit about how they work (though lord knows the computer additions... don't know a thing) and can change my own oil, check my fluids, keep my tires inflated, change wiper blades... wash and wax the thing myself. I have a pressure washer I'm going to use regularly to clean it from now on... I loved hanging around with my dad, so I loved learning what he knows. You might still lure your niece to work with you on cars WITHOUT her sister whining at her. She'll thank you later.
@Screenwriter : My brother seems to not care one way or the other. His wife never tells me anything. My mom watches the girls on some mornings, and thinks that both of them being girly is a very precious treasure. So I don't get much support there.
I only get to see her a few days of the week, for maybe an hour at most. I have to work most of those days. And I usually get Thursday off, when she isn't around. She's turning 4, so cars are a few years off. She loves watching Dumbo. Which is fine, because my family has had all the Frozen it can take.
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2128- I don't know I find the way to understand people is to get to know them. I have never found it helpful to rely on stereotypes bc they definitely don’t fit everyone ~ if they even really fit anyone.
i never really understood all the energy that guess in explaining kinds of people Bc you are going to have to learn first hand for yourself about any person that you are with. Romantically or otherwise.
I know for sure if someone tried to rely on stereotypes about women or Russ ten or French or Chinese people, they wouldn’t be any close to understand me Than if They just didn’t time talking and asking questions.. and kist often they’d be farther away to understanding me by relying on stereotypes.
I find Stereotypes function much The way a broken clock is right twice a day. But you Are not really learning anything about the relationship to the other numbers or what is going on the rest of the time. Lots of “ info” is quite static stunted And the effort to fit within it, doesn't allow room for growth.
none the less , I’m interested to see the answers 😊😊2|20|0 - This is a real good question, here is what i have been through and how things becane and changed with time plus the things i see around me and the people Who tells me a little bit more.
The most of them think that a man think about sex all the time. The man can't be emotionel, they can't communicate. The man is a mess and women have to have their touch on the man some how. They can change the man just because they don't like "few things" they do, many women think a man should do everything from being handy and good in his job with big bucks beside the looks plus education with a hint on style and pure charm. Many things women think about men that are very unrealistic for todays standard but at The same time there is men that are so horribel they really can't even change a light bulb.0|00|0 - Depends, but structured logic with technical things is a thing...
As example, my girlfriend is rearranging the furniture, she didn't measure anything, didn't get tools... so she stands there and lifts the bookshelf 4 times overhead just to see that screw needs a screwdriver, and a 5th and 6th time to see that the tool in her hand isn't a screwdriver... hours later, after she gave up, I measure all, make a real plan with her (like in "reality") and after an hour all is at the place where it should be... pls girls, if you want to do something, make a plan (even just in your head)
Sometimes it looks to me if she would pick all the possibilitys out which cost at most time and nerves, just to combine all them and do it the hardest way its possible to do... not logic to me0|00|0 - Early on in dating, we are really stupid. If we can get out 2 works clearly, that's impressive.
We often have poor training, lack confidence, have our own issues. You expect us to have it all together, so many don't... for a long time.
we are human and have feelings and can be especially hurt by the women, we just don't feel them like you. Some of ours is like a "gong" that doesn't make much sound, we know something happened, but we don't know what it was... and might take 3 days to hear it and know what it was.
We don't understand females until we are like... older. So realize, were interested, but we have no idea what we are dealing with... who is training us? Nobody... but you and all the other women.1|10|0 - Probably that men communicate the same as women. I do that even in platonic relationships. I’m so used to my own female ways it doesn’t occur to me that my guy friends are different when it comes to self expression. It’s almost like how I grew up in a mostly French speaking household so when I talked to my peers at school or sometimes strangers—I’d use certain phrases and expressions that weren’t English and everyone looked at me weird but I thought I was the normal one 😂😂
of course I was younger at the time0|11|0People communicate differently and they find a common language by learning each others studies and adjusting. That is with anyone person no matter The gender. If you share a common language then you easily have the hope of understanding each other.
@VIVANT
I get what you’re saying but I feel that women are more in sync with each other when it comes to communication and I also believe it influences the way opposite sexes express themselves to one another. Men could learn and adjust... but it takes work and effort that a lot of them aren’t even completely aware of. And women are just a bit lazy and dismissive.
- - Thinking that what a man is feeling bad about is not a big deal. Most women would rather put their own feelings first and want the guy to listen to them.
- Men want sex with women they really like. Women believe they are the only ones to be like this, when men infact are a lot like this as well. Which is why men often want sex with their female friends. Men want intimacy with women they know well and who they're comfortable with.
- Most men don't have ulterior motives or hidden intentions. Women have an annoying habit of overthinking everything a guy says or does and reading too deep into him, which is actually somewhat offensive because you're not taking a guy seriously or at face value and believe there must be some hidden agenda behind his words/actions.0|10|0Regarding the last point, just gonna leave it here that just in case my man ended up cheating or abusing or anything else, people will blame ME for not being able to tell that he was obviously bad news.
It's a 'damned if I do, damned if I don't' situation.
- Just because we will never be emotionally vulnerable or express our feelings when we're around you, doesn't mean we don't have them. Men don't like to be shamed for expressing their emotions, and in my opinion the majority of such shaming is perpetrated by women, and not other men.2|40|0
Women don’t lie Being she’s and that happens a lot. I see a lot of assumption that women just roll out of hed singing their feelings lol many are very guarded and do not express anything to anyone. Many people find it demeaning, I think that is more cultural Not gender based.
Just my in my opinion I don’t expect you to agree.. it’s just there is a lot of misconception in general that I often see.
1 lots of guys DO so express themselves.
2 lots of women DO NOT.
I think both women and men do have the ability to express feelings when they trust their partner/ friend. But many have been raised it is shameful so it can be challenging.
Guys express feelings to me all the time. Bc I don’t judge.
I’m not saying it’s not true, but I really can't believe anyone believes a person who doesn’t express feeling doesn't have feelings... but still some point our partners want confirmation or they don’t feel like they are with a human being.
I’ve had that problem myself bc I don’t express myself. I can understand wanting to see proof of your partners humanity though.. I don’t mean simply how we feel about them, but how we feel in general. I always thought it was the worst thing, but it seems not expressing anything is really bad.
I think men make fun of women and men for expressing feeling.. I’m not sure what women do tbh.You may be the exception, and what you're describing may be the norm where you are. However, this is the reality for a lot of guys.
- Many women think they can change a man who doesn't want to settle down.9|101|0
It's not even about settling down. It's about interesting a man who is ambivalent about them. On any level.
- Looking at other women isn't cheating.
Looking at sexy naked women on porn isn't cheating.
Some of our weaknesses are truly going to turn them completely off. That's why we keep hiding them.
Us being nice doesn't always mean we want to take advantage of you (sex) like the incels and the fake-nice-guys do.
That we never cry. Instead we return to base and then break down and heal up - alone. Sometimes with a lot of ethanol.2|41|0I don’t cry in public I find it humiliating even if I’m alone. I don’t think that reticence is gender specific. I have always felt that way.
I’m just thinking not all culture see it as degrading.- Show All Show Less
I’ve seen it in Europe when I was younger. lol not like bawling but shedding a few tears. .
though I really rarely see anyone crying in public in the states. I actually don’t even think I have in all the time I’ve been here.
But my main point was that not showing pain isn’t something all men feel,
nor is it something ONLY men do feel.
Many women feel the same , so it really wouldn’t be hard at all to understand a person behaving guarded.
Personally, I’ve never thought of this as gender related but cultural.@VIVANT On another question, why are women sometimes wanting to be let in when guys are trying pretty respectfully to guard themselves, keeping some secrets they deem are better left unsaid? Not, that they're harmful secrets but out of the fear, that it will repulse away the woman asking to be let in.
Hmm I think boundaries Should be respected. Encouraging someone to open up is fine but it shouldn’t be done as coercion. I e had the sane problems with people pushing me and I just shut down.
I think the person has to be understanding thar if you are not ready to talk about something you are not ready. Without having to explain why ~~ bc that kind of defeats the purpose
It’s tricky bc you want your boundary protected without alienating your partner.
I wish I had a simple solution.. I’m guessing its best yo go slowly so there is time for trust to build up.
I understand your fear that whatever it is will not be accepted. I can say most people when they care for you will not freak out when you convey something. I can’t really say for sure, bc I don't know specifics. But I think most decent people are decent. If someone judges you for it is testament to their poor nature.
If you want to talk privately feel free to message 😊
- That men are just horny or hungry. That they dont have as much emotions or value the same things. That they aren't empathetic and only are in relationships for a social purpose. That they dont really have a soft heart for people they love and they have hearts of stone.0|00|0
- At this point in my life.
i dont understand anything anymore when it comes to men.
you guys are all so so so different.6|60|0Then you do understand, women are all different too. Now what are you going to do with that knowledge
And instead of taking that knowledge and doing something useful you'll sit there and pretend to be a grown up. And you'll spend the rest of your life wondering why you aren't top of the list when people are sending out invites
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@akihon come on.. stop being ageist. What did YOU know about this stuff when you were 25. I sure didn't know much of shit... It takes time to get your sea legs... She's just starting... I dislike it when experienced people talk down to those with less experience. Cut her some slack. Be kind.
And at what point am I going to do that when she has a hero to come to her rescue, you are doing her a disservice here by not allowing her the room to defend herself, taking away her agency, I'm impressed, however where you've both failed is what are you going to do with that knowledge, a concise answer would have been to see the individual, a respectable answer would have been to treat each as an individual and not a member of the whole, a better one would have been to argue that balance must be sought when one attacks an entire gender for the behaviour of a few to remind that person not all and many from the attackers own gender displayed just as abhorrent behaviour from time to time.
But no, neither of you, age isn't a barrier to intellectual capacity.And yes at the age of 25 I had already been through combat and seen many die so yeah I did know a lot more about the world than either of you two.
@akihon Intellectual capacity is NOT life experience. The two are completely different. There are 10 year old geniuses. They have no life experience and therefore cannot make mature decisions on such topics. They can do differential equations and chemistry. That takes study, not wisdom. You certainly knew more about the world of men in combat and the poignancy of losing comrades in such situations. What I'd like to know is how that impacted your ability to have relationships with women. I'm unclear of that connection. And I don't feel it's a disservice to have an opinion about the fact that a 41 year old would think a 25 year old would have interpersonal relationships figured out. If YOU did, I think you're an unusual person: man or woman. She can always offer her comments on what you're saying. I'm not stopping her. I'm weighing in with mine, as this is an open forum. And at 25, I was stumbling around in the dark in that arena. It seemed to me that your written tone, though of course that doesn't exist, what that you expected to be where you were at that time, which, since she's a different person, might be more unlikely than not.
was that you expect HER to be at the same juncture as you were at that age... and of course... we are all individuals and mature at different times...
Then you do understand it. The biggest misunderstanding women have about men is that we are some fking hive mind like the majority of women. Men are much more individualistic than women, way less group thinkers, way more likely to go against the grain. You can have a group of 5 dudes be best friends have have radically different opinions across a myriad of subjects.
Ever see a group of 5 chicks having a heated argument while being best friends then laughing it off like it was nothing, while keeping their emotions under control? Sadly, men these days are far from what they once were, but you'll still often see this amongst men. I have NEVER seen this amongst women. Every group of girls always has to be in perfect agreement about everything, like some hive mind, or the lone wolf is kicked to the curb.
Lone wolf girls who've been kicked to the curb, I am here for you. Have your divergent opinion, don't be afraid to piss of your girls, fuck them, you gotta trust yourself and stay true to who you are, and people who ditch you for that, you don't want emOk so for screenwriter who so desperately wants to be the knight in shining armour here, how does it relate to relationships with women, well let's see before I was even a teenager I knew that not all women think alike but also knew that most have neither the spine nor the intellectual capacity to say what they actually think so will. follow the crowd on any subject no matter how reprehensible the proposal because being part of a group is more important than doing the right thing most often called action by consensus, a diversionary tactic employed most often than not by women to avoid blame for anything that goes wrong but similarly being able to claim victim status when credit for success goes to somebody else.
I was acutely aware of how women think and behave and how they say being equal is important but actually being equal is a buzz word, in fact then to be seen as treating women as equals a man has to still cater to their whims as though they are special. Men who don't buy into that bullshit are called mysoginystic simply because we have a very logical view of what equal actually means, that you are of no more value to society by virtue of your vagina than I am because of a penis, that because of what I do and can do means that I am actually of higher value than most women because equality.
These things I knew long before even hitting my teenage years and yet here you are trying to defend an adult, or should I say a woman child, and I think in this case I'd be more than correct because that's all you've managed to do here is to maintain her immaturity.@akihon
oh you reply back just checking in now because of real life
I have a life and job and your sorry ass is trying to help someone!
GTFO and gone somewhere i didn't answer in a negative way at all. you need to take a class or too on Just general basics words. it shrug like
Oh with all this knowledge it like i know nothing. Duh you could not pick that up huh?
25 but wise enough to know i will need to always learn more. But since you dont know me
your words mean... nothing and i dont like people like you. Stop your judgement me before you knew me.
And you're nothing more than a virtue signalling child, fuck yourself right off with your emotional instability and entitlement, you snowflake.
@akihon I don't know about "most" women. I know about me and my compadres. We've never been part of a crowd and have both spines and the intellectual capacity to say what we think. This might be why we've never been popular with most men, either...
Being equal is important. It doesn't mean being the same, however. I don't usually have "whims" nor do I expect anyone to cater to them, except myself. I hope I'm as special to the man I love as he will be to me.
I completely agree that a vagina does not make women any more special than a penis makes men and that's why women should be registering for the draft and in similar positions in the military as men are. Though it's a fact that most women cannot pass the physical tests as well as most women, there are many positions that women are suited for that won't require Seal Team Six capabilities. For women who can make Seal Team Six, let them. I do say that there might be some adjustments for women that will not jeopardize safety and ability to do the job. If packs are 40 lbs for men, for women those packs might be 35 lbs, and for smaller men, those packs might be also adjusted. The loss of 5 lbs would mean some serious thinking would have to be done to accommodate strength differences. Remember, not the same, but essentially equal.
People hit milestones in their lives at all different ages. Yes, I'm defending her immaturity because people mature at broadly different ages. I won't defend that she remain IGNORANT. I think she's here asking questions to learn. I welcome her questions and support her seeking knowledge.@Shamalien That hive mind stuff applies to teen agers in most respects. It's never applied to me or my friends. I don't even have enough of them to constitute a hive... And everybody giggling and agreeing sounds like a damned boring scenario to me..
- Their interest in them, girls are usually off track to whether a guy is into them or not.
They overly analyse it based on what they want wish or fear, depends on the character.
But it is always a projection of how they are feeling than what actually is the case.1|20|0Yeah i think we all do a bit of that. Sonetimes qe misread one sign and hen our heads build an enire story around it that's false. Lol
I'm glad you could understand what i typed. I didn't proofread and i just realized how bad that was.
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- That all we care about is sex, that we don't have feelings or we can't love like women do (seriously, I have heard women make this claim and its utter bullshit), or that they can give us sex and then not have to actually do anything else in the relationship as if all we are, are walking talking penis's.0|10|0
- haha. no I do not misunderstand men. Men and women are the same. Its only the drama filled petty assholes who tend to create problems by overanalyzing things.0|00|0
- Women don’t understand that men respond to action (or lack there of), not words.1|71|1
ideally everyone should be this way. Actions are what really matter in this world, words are just fluff. Sadly, you are correct, women have this misunderstanding in the modern world...
Anonymous8 moWomen think they can change a man into the man they have always wanted, they can't. If a man isn't the right man in the beginning of a relationship he never will be.4|91|0100%. People shouldn't be trying to change someone to a person they're not unless they need help changing.
- Many women ("thic/fat" women included) think all men wants to sleep with them. Men have standards too and it's sexist to assume that all men are just rabid hounds willing to hump anything that breathes.
Also, men aren't psychic and can't read your minds. If you tell men to leave when you actually wanted to talk/vent about your problems, it's not our fault for leaving.1|30|0 - I often see on here a confusion about nice guys. A lot of women don’t know if he’s just being nice or he’s being nice because he’s romantically interested.2|20|0
@Jamie05rhs
Certainly you can be nice and romantically intersted. It’s preferred 😛
Maybe she meant “ acting” nice ONLY bc he’s intersted romantically. So then you don’t really Know him.
In the other hand, everyone does a bit of putting their best self forward.@VIVANT I do try to put my best foot forward, but only because I would treat my woman better than any other person on the planet. So I think it's still representative of how I truly am, even if I am not quite that way with everyone.
- Show All Show Less
right, not understanding his intention... especially hard with "nice" guys because they don't differentiate very well between nice and "Im interested", and thats the problem nice guys own to fix. great point!
- We dont jus want sex. I can't tell you how many females i talk to that automatically associate me w only wanting sex cause im a teen guy who dresses nice. Id much rather talk about your feelings, take you on dates, sing together, go on walks, etc then fuck. Dont judge a book by its cover there's much more to people the. You think0|30|0
- That if they can make them fall in love they will commit and settle down with them and become the man they want.
And that they will love them more if they are more tolerant to their bullshit.0|21|2 - that they would understand their language and expressions just as much their lady friends do.2|31|0
Why wouldn’t they?
If you are speaking the same language and communicate clearly what would be the block?
I suppose If someone doesn’t want to understand they won’t , but that isn’t bc they can not.women use more generalizations and metaphors than men. ask anyone. it doesn't always hinder their communication but is responsible for miscommunication more oft than not.
- I think a lot of women don’t trust men and think that they will cheat probably from bad past experiences3|10|0
@VIVANT i’m pretty sure that i was cheated on 😂 but I don’t think that every guy is a cheater now i judt think that many guys are just assholes not all though
Yeah I just was laughing bc women don’t get cheated on a lot. Or at least they find out a lot. I don't know if guys actually do it more
You don’t mean by the new guy do you?- Show All Show Less
@VIVANT no my ex was lying when he said he was at a party he was actually with her and he was also active on tinder while dating me
I meant DO get cheated on a lot
Wish you found Out more since?
What a rat ~~ good riddance !! 🤮@VIVANT i agree i hope that nathan is better he seems really nice so far and I actually think that he is cute lol i never found my ex cute
lol me neither 😂🤭
Yes Nathan is cute snd does seem nice
You should suggest hanging out again if it’s been over a week ☺️@VIVANT i wish but it’s spring break and i also suggested meeting the first time. So this time i should wait for him to decide right?
Very true, and equally true for men also. How so many men and women run around cheating astounds me.
@SomeGuyCalledTom I'm starting to think it's people who get some part of what they like from one person and the rest from someone else because they simply can't get all of it from one person. But this is wrongheaded. You can never get EVERYTHING from one person... Cheating doesn't seem a good solution because it causes so much grief. Though for some an open partnership works. However, people might consider developing good friendships with opposite sex, or same sex, people to fill the gap that a spouse might not fill.
- I don't know. That men have it easy or that we are these stoic and strong beings who should be able to do a lot of things without trouble? One of the things I know they don't understand is how to communicate with us.0|10|0
- Going out to watch sports with our friends. We don't need you nagging at us0|00|0
- A man thinks if he listens he can fix the problem even if you're just talking0|00|0
- I have a misinterpretation that men actually care and don’t just want sex 😭3|10|3
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To other people reading this I don’t mean I think this about everyone I’m just saying this cause I’ve been hurt and treated like shit
So many women want a guy to care about them. Yet they do nothing to encorage that. If you're a self serving woman you're probably going to attract a self serving guy. Sorry.
@ChiTown33 i have tried to show I care about guys before
But I don’t get it back from them@ChiTown33 I also have autism so empathy is a struggle for me. It’s super duper mild but getting other people’s perspectives is still very hard at times
Some of us do, and we show in diff ways, but we also may not feel things same. I've seen men care exceptionally for women, to the point... I'm amazed. . But I know some guys do not... they lack empathy and emotions. If that is what you are dating over and over, then you have to select better and filter out. Because not everyones brain is wired same. sorry for your pain, know it doesn't feel good when is one sided.. or feels that way.
- When I was younger I used to mistake their utopic life scenarios for things they really want to achieve1|00|1
- Anonymous8 moThat ever man is different, they may present themselves in a way that seems familiar to you, but deep down we are all complex individuals.0|00|0
- the one at the top of any list would be that men are all the same1|10|0
- Anonymous8 moLiterally everything women think about men is wrong and based on their close minded feminized version of how humans should be.0|00|0
- Why don’t they ever open up even when I tell them it isn’t a sight of weakness1|00|2
What if there's nothing to open up about? And they tell you they're fine because they really are fine.
Because I’ve been hurt by girlfriends I truly loved with all of my heart and they hurt me badly and I’m worried if I invest in someone emotionally and romantically that they will hurt me too.
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@mattl338 I’m so sorry to here that if you ever need to talk to someone than I’m here otherwise you should see a professional who can understand
Thank you I appreciate that, and well I feel guilty because I don’t want to bring my baggage onto you when we only just met.. but if you really don’t mind then i guess I don’t either
Because they're 13. You don't want someone that age to "open up." He's trying to grow into a man. Let him.
- We really don't like getting too emotional. Logic is much more comfortable.0|20|0
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@EmbraceThePain It's natural and makes life easier for us. Rationality and calm decision making is flat out superior to crying or pondering "what do they really mean" and so on.
- Asker8 mo
@Juxtapose
Yes, it really is easier and healthier in so many respects.
I just don’t like it when someone says that men aren’t emotional because they don’t want to be seen by other people as being emotional and I don’t think that’s the case. I just think men, overall, are just relatively not as emotional as women. I’m not emotional because I’m afraid of someone seeing me emotional, rather, I’m just not that way naturally. Women are more emotional because it’s what they incline to more naturally than men. Being too emotional has its downsides as well as being too logical. Sometimes, it’s better to show emotion and not approach a situation in a brainiac manner. it was a joke. I don’t use Myself for a standard, but you are the one arguing I am An exception and I don’t agree.
You -seem- have a distorted idea of What being a woman means. it’s not your fault , I don’t blame you. there is a lot of demeaning propaganda Against women Out there.
None the less “being rational” is not a guy thing.
being uncomfortable with emotion- which is what I was initially responding to. The “ discomfort”
-~~~ That is really a very common sentiment that does not apply to only men, nor does it apply to all men.
some men are perfectly comfortable with their feelings and go far with that.I was never trying to be contrary. I responded to the commits that interest me. This is a subject I sorbs a lot of time discussing with women and men in different countries from varying cultural political religious back grounds.. People’s perception about themselves and others interests me greatly.
I suppose I better tactic would have been to ask more questions, but this isn’t an interview and who knows if anyone would answer, so instead I shared my view. I definitely meant no harm. 😊
- I really don't know but I have seen many women who try to settle down with men that are just not into settling down.0|20|0
- That the desire of men to have sex means they are only interested in their physical body.0|10|0
- Women who think men want relationships, when done just want quick sex0|10|2
I disagree, all my friends want relationships and I only want to lose my virginity to the right girl.
I think it's just that fuckboi guys are more active about approaching because they don't mind being rejected.
- There isn't enough storage in all Microsoft's cloud to hold the concept that this topic asks.0|10|0
- If you don't want advice on your problems, then don't tell them to us.0|01|0
- Intimacy and sex. Totally misunderstood.0|00|0
- Women assume I'm more horny more often than I am.0|00|0
- They have feelings4|100|0
Such a simple statement yet so sad that to many women this is a foreign concept (or worse, that some women KNOW men have feelings, but just don't CARE.)
hummm... we do have feelings, some of us. but they aren't like yours I suspect and are like trying to make sense out of her emotions... not easy to decifer sometimes.
- All the ever want is sex.0|10|1
I would say for a lot of guys that's true but some men want to be friends with their partner too.
Probably right from your viewpoint, your culture is highly sexualized in places and young guys... may be all they understand. it's not true, there is love and other feelings, but you may only be seeing that.
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@lightbulb27 I truly think the world culture of traditional masculinity and young man masculinity is highly sexualized and anti feeling for the simple reason is that presents a facade of protection from other men. You're in the "club" if you're talking about sex with women, and that's a mild competition, and if you don't talk about feelings you do not appear vulnerable. With close male friends, I believe that's different. They can be open. But also funny and sexual because they're confident about good relationships with womena nd they try to problem solve by talking, just like women do. Maybe a different style... but close men don't have those issues. One thing I love about my24 year old son, he has many good male friends, he's popular and he has a good heart. The friends I've met, all give off good vibes. Good dudes. He has to work through issues with women, but he talks those things over with me to a good extent and I'm sure also with his man friends. WIth both sexes, it's about striking a balance.
@Screenwriter sounds right, there's hould be nothing wrong with talking about our relationships, but it's that showing weakness and being vulnerable that is difficult... we learn not to do that or will get hurt.
Imagine President Trump saying on twitter or on the news, the other day I argued with Melania, it hurt my feelings a lot, but we talked through it". What are people going to think, will the "left" admire him for being open and honest. It just isn't perceived as masculine in our society.
We attempt to do this in mens' church groups but it is a challenge.
Your son sounds like a good guy, it help if dad is there to talk to, but talking to mom openly is good. Problem is... I'm not sure mom's have the right answers sometimes and can give bad advice in dating:)
@lightbulb27 I tell my son to date someone he respects, likes, has fun with and feels intellectually equal to. He enjoys talking about ideas, politics. Thinks about thinking. He had a girl he had hot sex with and that fizzled out because all she wanted to do was smoke pot, have sex and had no ambition to do anything else. I got that vibe from her from the start. A nice, bland person. I didn't say anything to him about it until after they broke up. He agreed she had no desire to do anything interesting or talk about anything interesting. That's my take on what a young man should look for. And that's when a mom should keep her mouth shut. He has to figure these things out. When he comes to me with it, I give out. He and his dad don't discuss those issues. The vulnerability thing doesn't go over well with his dad... But his dad loves him to death and gives in other ways. So it all works out. We each have our different relationships with our sons.
@Screenwriter the bible calls it "equally yolked", what you describe sounds right to me. lm guess... she was blonde? don't answer that:)
- i understand men in relationships i would say0|00|2
- Men would have sex with any women0|11|1
Really and on what authority are you making that statement, I've rejected many who I don't have any feelings for.
I think she's saying that that's a misunderstanding. But please correct me if I'm wrong, @kangy.
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- Uh, that we're in charge?0|00|1
- that men can read their minds0|10|0
- Anonymous8 moOur need for sex0|00|0
- Anonymous8 moThey think it's sexist to want a sandwich0|01|0
- Anonymous8 moYou should leave her0|00|0
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