How to take things slow and make him chase?

Question

Me and this guy have been talking for 5 months now, it was going great until the beginning of March. Now I understand at first it’s that exciting feeling and we texted called etc 24/7, around 3 weeks ago he started to leave my messages in delivered for sometimes 18 hours and he’s still taking his time with leaving me on delivered. This got me mad, so I confronted him about it.

Our argument got dragged out for days and eventually he told me “I don’t have that strong feelings for you” and he told me that he started feeling like that when I was nagging about him being so inactive, which was about a week ago. Yesterday he called me and he said “you’re acting like I’m your man, I told you from the start I want to take it slow and see where it takes us”.

Now I really want to take it slow with him, but I don’t know how. Do I act hard to get? What does that mean? Leave him on delivered for hours and act uninterested? I really don’t know. Please help. Also, I know I should not have nagged and argued about it since we aren’t together. I know, and I apologized about that. Now I don’t know how to make him chase me again. What do I do? Help

Answer 1

Anonymous

Honestly not to be rude but don’t listen to the advice below! He obviously lost interest since you confronted him about how you feel about him taking a while to respond... I’d do the same thing he’s doing take long to respond and if he asks you why just play it cool and come up with some lame excuse then flirt with him and then disappear for a bit! That’ll teach him! But if he doesn’t seem bothered by the fact that you’re taking long to respond then drop him and move on.. he was honest about saying he doesn’t feel strongly about and wants to take it slow.. take it as it is! when a guy is into you he’ll respond fast.. just like he did when you first started talking to him! Don’t let his shitty behaviour slide now just because you connected with him...

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Asker

+1 y
It’s been two days and he still hasn’t responded to me, so you think I should end it?
Opinion Owner

+1 y
How can you end something that didn’t even start! Do what I said above! He responds don’t answer open his message even and leave him on read for a couple of days! Then when you’re bored hit him up and flirt Then disappear... i literally told you what to above :)

Answer 2

Asker

It’s been two days and he still hasn’t responded to me, so you think I should end it?

Answer 3

Opinion Owner

How can you end something that didn’t even start! Do what I said above! He responds don’t answer open his message even and leave him on read for a couple of days! Then when you’re bored hit him up and flirt Then disappear... i literally told you what to above :)

Answer 4

potatoiswhoiam | 256 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Yoda

It's not his job to chase you. Don't treat relationships like a chasing game. He told you his feelings are not strong, so make your decision to leave or stay. When a guy says that nothing's about to change. If you wanna play games the whole relationship will be one big game. Since this relationship has not even started and he's losing feelings already, then don't expect it to be different once it starts

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Asker

+1 y
But he was starting to lose them once I started arguing with him, and I thought men wants a girl who’s not available all the time?
potatoiswhoiam

+1 y
It's not about availability. It's about both partners/potential partners having a life. Which I have to agree with him here. He's taking things slow which means you guys are starting to get to know each other. Maybe he's just not the type of person who's always online and ready to reply to your text. That's probably just his personality.. we all try to impress at first and then our true colors show, and that's probably just how he's like. See you already know him a bit better, and it seems like you are starting to get a bit incompatible. So don't ignore those signs, it's not a bad thing to be different. What matters is can you make it work?
Asker

+1 y
Honestly I don’t know o think I’ll have to see if he’s gonna step up since we had a talk about him being so inactive yesterday and me agreeing to take things slow. However, he still hasn’t replied to me it’s literally been 23 hours..
Show All Show Less
Asker

+1 y
Maybe I’m overreacting? Maybe we shouldn’t talk everyday? What do you think?
potatoiswhoiam

+1 y
Tbh there is no written rule in this. From what I see he's just not a good texter, he doesn't text often. Maybe it's different when it comes to dating in real life, maybe he wouldn't seem disinterested.
The fact that he's a bad texter is good or bad, depending on you and what you need in a relationship and what you're ready to compromise. If you're a good texter and you are more of a needy person, while he's a bad texter and likes his alone time more, then that just means you're different and you're either incompatible - which means that neither of you would compromise or can handle this difference, or you can work towards getting through those differences and be compatible - which depends on both of you.
Hope that clears things out a little bit.

Answer 5

Asker

But he was starting to lose them once I started arguing with him, and I thought men wants a girl who’s not available all the time?

Answer 6

potatoiswhoiam

It's not about availability. It's about both partners/potential partners having a life. Which I have to agree with him here. He's taking things slow which means you guys are starting to get to know each other. Maybe he's just not the type of person who's always online and ready to reply to your text. That's probably just his personality.. we all try to impress at first and then our true colors show, and that's probably just how he's like. See you already know him a bit better, and it seems like you are starting to get a bit incompatible. So don't ignore those signs, it's not a bad thing to be different. What matters is can you make it work?

Answer 7

Asker

Honestly I don’t know o think I’ll have to see if he’s gonna step up since we had a talk about him being so inactive yesterday and me agreeing to take things slow. However, he still hasn’t replied to me it’s literally been 23 hours..

Answer 8

Asker

Maybe I’m overreacting? Maybe we shouldn’t talk everyday? What do you think?

Answer 9

potatoiswhoiam

Tbh there is no written rule in this. From what I see he's just not a good texter, he doesn't text often. Maybe it's different when it comes to dating in real life, maybe he wouldn't seem disinterested.
The fact that he's a bad texter is good or bad, depending on you and what you need in a relationship and what you're ready to compromise. If you're a good texter and you are more of a needy person, while he's a bad texter and likes his alone time more, then that just means you're different and you're either incompatible - which means that neither of you would compromise or can handle this difference, or you can work towards getting through those differences and be compatible - which depends on both of you.
Hope that clears things out a little bit.

Answer 10

spartan55 | 22K opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Master

Hahaha yeah make him chase you... that'll work... 😂 😂 😂

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Answer 11

saggittarius039112

Xper 7

Why not chase him a bit?

React

Asker

+1 y
Because I feel like I’m doing more than he is, I want him to not take me for granted

Answer 12

Asker

Because I feel like I’m doing more than he is, I want him to not take me for granted

Answer 13

Boyisjoy | 52 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Xper 4

Take his heart away!

React

Asker

+1 y
How?
Boyisjoy

+1 y
Make him urs!
Boyisjoy

+1 y
Or 4get him & consider me 4 it!
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Asker

+1 y
But he wants to take it slow
Boyisjoy

+1 y
But, u want 2 take it fast!

Answer 14

Boyisjoy

Make him urs!

Answer 15

Boyisjoy

Or 4get him & consider me 4 it!

Answer 16

Asker

But he wants to take it slow

Answer 17

Boyisjoy

But, u want 2 take it fast!

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