Is it too forward if a guy asks a girl early on if she likes spooning?

Question

Do you think it is forward if you are exchanging messages with a guy, and you’ve been getting to know him by text for a few days, and he asks you if you like spooning at the end of a long message he sends you?

would this put you off?

Answer 1

bobalife

Xper 6

Yeah I’d feel like it’s too forward if I’m not really comfortable with him cuz it has only been the first few days. It should be more about showing respect, earning trust, and getting to know each other appropriately. I mean he could be playful but not make a girl thinks he just want a cuddle buddy or casually if that’s where it’s heading... unless that’s what they’re both looking for.

Answer 2

Smoke-n-Growls | 98 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Yoda

I wouldn't be put off by that. Talking preferences is something that's normal and important. Plus, I do love spooning, so a dude who's into that is already in my good graces.

Answer 3

Anonymous

Only if you let it put you off. I asked a younger girl a few days ago if she liked oral in a texted me. She responded “No. Nobody likes giving head.” I then responded “I meant receiving”.

She then acted flirty but also stand offish after that. I didn’t push it. But there is something about she that makes my mouth water. But that is the first time I brought up anything sexual.

fishlipsfriend

2 mo
Any guy who asks that oral question just makes me think he is only thinking of sex. Spooning is different from a sex question
Opinion Owner

2 mo
@fishlipsfriend really? Spooning is spooning. It’s penetration.

I guess it’s a softer entry because the guy is cuddling with you. I’ve never had a girl turn me down on that but I never texted about it either. I did when the girl was interested but stand offish.

Funny because many guys can accept a BJ and nada else like it’s no big deal. I wonder if some women feel the same vice versa. This girl is 15 years younger and I don’t see her immediately being gung ho straight penetration sex talk with a guy she met on bumble.

But there something about her that makes my mouth water. I definitely don’t do that on most girls but she looks yummy. But if that comes as too aggressive I’ll quit.

We talked about a lot of non sexual things but I want to drop a hint I’m interested. I learned my lesson years ago being too nice and platonic. But I also learned my lesson about being too aggressive which also scares women.

Always a tight rope.
fishlipsfriend

2 mo
Hun they meaning cuddling not the sex position lol
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fishlipsfriend

2 mo
Any guy who starts talking to me about bj on a date is a man who will never see me again. Its inappropriate
Opinion Owner

2 mo
@fishlipsfriend well we had two different definitions of “spooning”. I always thought it was defined as a man who starts cuddling from behind and “spoons” you know what you know where. This other guy might have the same thing.

And no I did not ask her for a BJ. I don’t even want one tbh. I’m actually quite long down there and unfortunately when girls do that I don’t get enough sensation.

As for her I led into this. I first asked “do you mind if I ask you a sultry question?” She responded with “sultry? Lol sure” I then said “do you like oral?”. She thought I meant I wanted a BJ. But I explained it was about her receiving it.

We have been chatting for 3 weeks about other things. I never ever bring up sex in the first conversation. She acted excited but also stand offish

Answer 4

fishlipsfriend

Any guy who asks that oral question just makes me think he is only thinking of sex. Spooning is different from a sex question

Answer 5

Opinion Owner

@fishlipsfriend really? Spooning is spooning. It’s penetration.

I guess it’s a softer entry because the guy is cuddling with you. I’ve never had a girl turn me down on that but I never texted about it either. I did when the girl was interested but stand offish.

Funny because many guys can accept a BJ and nada else like it’s no big deal. I wonder if some women feel the same vice versa. This girl is 15 years younger and I don’t see her immediately being gung ho straight penetration sex talk with a guy she met on bumble.

But there something about her that makes my mouth water. I definitely don’t do that on most girls but she looks yummy. But if that comes as too aggressive I’ll quit.

We talked about a lot of non sexual things but I want to drop a hint I’m interested. I learned my lesson years ago being too nice and platonic. But I also learned my lesson about being too aggressive which also scares women.

Always a tight rope.

Answer 6

fishlipsfriend

Hun they meaning cuddling not the sex position lol

Answer 7

fishlipsfriend

Any guy who starts talking to me about bj on a date is a man who will never see me again. Its inappropriate

Answer 8

Opinion Owner

@fishlipsfriend well we had two different definitions of “spooning”. I always thought it was defined as a man who starts cuddling from behind and “spoons” you know what you know where. This other guy might have the same thing.

And no I did not ask her for a BJ. I don’t even want one tbh. I’m actually quite long down there and unfortunately when girls do that I don’t get enough sensation.

As for her I led into this. I first asked “do you mind if I ask you a sultry question?” She responded with “sultry? Lol sure” I then said “do you like oral?”. She thought I meant I wanted a BJ. But I explained it was about her receiving it.

We have been chatting for 3 weeks about other things. I never ever bring up sex in the first conversation. She acted excited but also stand offish

Answer 9

worldscolide | 1.2K opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Guru

If its early on i wouldn't call it spooning, it sounds too much like sex. I would phrase it more like "do you like cuddles"

Answer 10

Tamera952 | 301 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Yoda

I'd save it for if and when it comes up in real life -- like a more appropriate time.

Answer 11

Konabeana | 120 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Yoda

I would take that as a red flag because he would be making me feel uncomfortable.

Answer 12

chevymcgthatsme

Xper 4

No way thts kl with me it seems fine it's not bad at all it feels nice nd good

Answer 13

Mickey9999 | 96 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic.

Explorer

No. It could have been way more personal or sexual of a question. Spooning is innocent enough. Maybe he loves it and his ex hated it. Nothing wrong with asking if you feel strongly about it.

RemoErdosain

2 mo
I thought the same. Kind of a cute question for me, to be honest
Mickey9999

2 mo
Absolutely! Sort of creepy right off the bat but she made it sound as though they’ve been texting a bit. Just another question of getting to know someone.
RemoErdosain

2 mo
I agree

Answer 14

RemoErdosain

I thought the same. Kind of a cute question for me, to be honest

Answer 15

Mickey9999

Absolutely! Sort of creepy right off the bat but she made it sound as though they’ve been texting a bit. Just another question of getting to know someone.