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So what is really desperate to guys, then?
I think that's what I was doing actually... I was so in love with this guy but I don't know what about him.. I guess mainly his looks but charm too
But I would say that isn't necessarily the same thing either. Being attracted to someone because they are good looking or charming isn't exactly the same as liking them because they happened to say hi before someone else. It becomes an issue when the personality of that person is removed from the equation, which is what happens when someone fetishizes a certain race, or fetishizes a certain characteristic of a certain group of people.
Well I was desperate.. because he didn't feel the same but I really liked him so I was thinking about him all the time and fantasizing. It consumed me
But did you like him because he looks nice or because his personality was actually worth liking
I dont think the personality is that great, he's like a womanizer/cheater. It was mostly cause of looks and charm
So uh, yes you were objectifying. I'd try to move away from that line of thinking if I were you.
Why? And what it means objectifying?
Objectifying means you're looking at someone as more of a sexual object than a real person. I don't see a problem with liking attractive people, but when the personality becomes disconnected from the person, that's dangerous. Nobody wants to date someone who only likes them for their looks. You also will find that once the looks fade (from age), your attraction will also disappear. That just leads to a lifetime of absolutely nothing.
No it wasn't really a sexual thing.. I would say more like romance/love fanitizings
Yeah she may have many options but out of all she's choosing him... isn't that a valid reason for desperation?
no. choosing him is an act of desperation. as to what makes her desoerate, no clue.
Why is it desperation? So its desperate to show interest and Express love to someone?