A long time ago my husband read some of my comments on my Reddit account. I talked about how I wasn’t attracted to him and how I’d picture other men during sex. I’d complain about some of our marital issues. About how he is controlling. I didn’t find out about what he read until several months after once I opened up to him about being unhappy in the relationship. We talked through them and he forgave me... but I am not satisfied and it seems in my mind these feelings are recurring no matter how hard I push them away.