I like a guy who is older than me and has 3 kids. Should I try to adjust to fit in this life or accept that it won’t work?

Anonymous
3 years ago I was in love. He was everything I could have wanted. But things change. I tried so hard but the reason it ended was because he just got tired of me. I felt helpless to have done anything differently because I did the things I needed to do for that to work. I loved him and I loved things about him that no other man possessed while he just took me for granted and felt like it was more to find elsewhere. I was heartbroken.

A while ago I met a man who, at the time, was 29. He is now 31 years old while I am currently 23. He has 3 kids and divorced. He and I have a good relationship as friends. He has asked me out a few times and I always said no because of circumstances. In addition to him having 3 kids, he also has dated somebody I know. I talk to him sometimes for advice and he is the one who encouraged me to be remain abstinent and find myself after my heartbreak. He didn’t take advantage of my vulnerability or pressure me to move on with him or anybody else. He also didn’t bash my ex but explained to me that young men may keep looking even when they find something good, encouraging me and uplifting me to believe in myself and not to feel unworthy of love because of what my ex did. He said that since he is a bit older he can understand because he has been there and grown past a lot of the things. He encouraged me to grow from the experience in a healthy way. He always listens when I need to talk and I think I could see myself falling for him. But the kids alone are a huge step for me and would be a challenge to go from no kids to step parenting 3. The deal breaker, however, is the fact that he is so much older than me and that he has dated someone I know. I feel he is too ahead in life. I think he knows I like him even though I vaguely explained my reasons why we couldn’t date. Recently we talked and I wanted to admit that I felt something but I kept it in and said I appreciate our friendship. He just laughed and said he did too.
I like a guy who is older than me and has 3 kids. Should I try to adjust to fit in this life or accept that it won’t work?
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