Did you ever think about someone only when you wanted sex ?

Ok... So I've been messing around with this girl, whose about 6 years older than me. But here's the thing, we're not together... I told her I didn't want anything with her the last time, that we could be friend, but every time I want to have sex, I tell her that I still like her and all that crap. So, I usually end up setting up a date, and always end up leaving her flat.

The reason why I leave her flat, is because my conscious starts to kick in, and I feel really bad. She wants something serious, and I honestly don't want that, I just want to have her as a "friend with benefits".

My problem is, why is it that when I want to have sex with her, I can't stop and say, "I won't play mind games with her". I don't get myself, honestly. I try not to do it, but my I think my urges or something make me do it. I mean, she's totally hot, but I just don't want to go out with her and those kinds of things.

So, I'm not sure, I guess I'm an a**hole right ? What can I do to prevent myself from setting up dates with her when I want to have sex with her, because that's all I do after the first time we did it. All I do is set up dates, then leave her flat, and then when I text her again I make the biggest lies/ excuses ever. :(
Did you ever think about someone only when you wanted sex ?
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