Someone said I was selfish for wanting kids? Is this fair they said this (Details below)?

The person said I'm selfish if I want kids but can't have them.

I was saying how upsetting it would be if i can't have kids.
It's worried me for some time now.
and That person responded that ur immature and selfish for wanting kids, etc...
  • Yes, you are selfish for wanting kids if you can't have them.
    Vote A
  • No, you should be able to want kids.
    Vote B
  • Results
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think the person was just trying to wind you up, so don't think about it too much, though that's easier said than done.

    Personally, I don't think I'd want kids myself, at least not now and I think not wanting them is more selfish than wanting them, but if you do want kids, prepare yourself and don't just have them for the sake of having them - make sure you can provide for them and everything.

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    • that is the priority being able to provide but like it's still really upsetting :/

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    • i am 99.9% sure that i'd want kids. my wants never usually change.
      Like when i was young i wanted to be either a teacher or do something within medical field of work. Never changed.
      And even then I wanted to have my own kids like in the sense of having my own family.

    • That's fine. Some people know what they want from a young age and it's good to be consistent.

Most Helpful Girl

  • The problem is, as a woman you're going to be called names and criticized about whatever you decide to do. Whether that's being a 'career driven' woman and not wanting kids. Whether that's wanting kids and not wanting to work. Whether that's trying to "do it all" and letting things occasionally slip through the cracks because no one physically CAN do it all on their own. You just are going to be criticized no matter what. So why not be happy with your life decisions and who cares what other people think?

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    • i don't really care what that person thinks but I don't know it has made me more upset than i would be otherwise

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • This person is trying to mess with your head. Ignore them.

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  • How foolish. Wanting the ability to raise children, love them, and give a good life to them is not selfish. In fact, it is quite beautifully selfless.

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    • Lately i have been feeling like i won't be able to ever have my own kids.
      There are other options not like i wouldn't love it just as much but I have always wanted to have the experience. I just keep crying about it :(

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    • Then now would be a good time to search for someone who also wants kids, and that you can love. Not a bad idea to search for love.

    • Already found that but the problem is going to the doctors and talking to them.
      What if my parents get word of my feeling about this?
      They really would misunderstand this..

  • It’s actually selfish not having kids because it shows you can’t share your life with another part of you and not have many responsibilities

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What Girls Said 3

  • Normally that's what I used to get when I said that I didn't want kids. I am the carrier of a rare genetic connective tissue disease. I have chosen not to bring children into this world. I have very strong opinions of people knowingly bringing children into the world if they have medical conditions that could be passed down. Now if you want to call that selfish, that is.

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    • Well I mean I'm not saying about anything like that I mean if someone is "infertile".

  • wtf, how is wanting kids selfish? i mean, this is a pretty shitty world to bring them into, lol. but still, reproduction is more or less our main goal... i dont understand how its selfish...

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  • Dont feed the troll

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