Did my depressive state go away or is this part of it?

LuneWayah
I have struggled for a long time with feeling depressed. Like, I had thoughts and feelings about feeling worthless, like I wasted my life, and all the other typical sad stuff that I ain't gonna bore you with. I used to have random bursts of anger or a 30 minute long rollercoaster of emotions coming from nowhere. I usually would grab a knife and write random things on my walls like, "HAPPY ROSE, COLD WINTER, RAIN FALLS." Stuff of which do nothing with anything and I would repeatedly say those things. I would also stab my bed when I had bursts of anger. I didn't entirely feel like I had much control over it but O had enough control to hide it from others and not did something like that in public. I'm sure some of y'alls are gonna say that I should ask a therapist or something but I don't think I need one. About a week or two ago I became constantly very angry, really just out of no where. I wanted to suffocate small animals and I kept having dreams of murdering people. I would never do such a thing of course. Just a few days ago it feels as if it just vanished. I don't feel happy or sad or angry. I do sometimes but I mainly feel nothing. Kinda robotic in a way. My moments of anger or intense mood swings went away as well after having it for almost 2 years. I don't care if I die or get hurt or anything. I'm unsure if I really care about anything except for my loved ones. I don't even care if I go broke and end up homeless. My boyfriend seems to be hinting that I'm becoming psychopathic but I thought psychopaths don't feel remorse or any feelings and are mainly selfish. If I am wrong I apologize for sounding so horrid with that description. I strongly disbelieve I am becoming psychopathic. I have had troubles with iron deficiency and now I am taking iron pills. I don't know if they are apart of it. I think I began feeling less emotions before I started taking my iron. Am I fine now? Is this how I'm supposed to be or does it seem like I may have a mental illness?
Did my depressive state go away or is this part of it?
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