How to come into terms with reality despite having depression?

Anonymous
I've been suffering from depression over the last 10years but only over the last 5years it's been diagnosed. However I dont wanna rely on medication to live my life although, I've been suffering with aniexty and fear but I'm trying to get better now and face my depression. Im trying to achieve things after the pandemic is over but, I'm feeling very numb with no vision at all to move forward although I have plans and goals to achieve. I feel like I can't finish tasks off i set to do of my own but wanna get better at time keeping , time management, focus on myself without being distracted but have been by family a lot. I wanna do things without giving up but it feels extremely difficult for me to actively do things because I lost motivation in my own life to achieve anything and in myself. I feel so lost but wanna get myself together and my life.
How to come into terms with reality despite having depression?
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