My Future Mother In Law is Nuts?

My fiance has two super young kids from a previous marriage and we're getting married in October. He lives with his mom and we're buying a house currently. Anyways, while he works his moms takes care of them. However, I try to take care of them when I'm not working or when I'm available.

I try to get them to bed at 8pm and she thinks they should stay up till they are tired. Then she'll turn around and think it's weird they take four hour naps everyday and they're grumpy. She doesn't believe in toothpaste so I'll have to supply it. On top of that she never scolds them whenever they disobey and she'll not make them eat dinner and instead just feed them junky snacks all the time.

Everytime I step in and do time-outs, make them sit there until they finish dinner, or even set up a bed time she'll say a smart-ass comment on how I'm being ridiculous or she'll turn around and let them out of bed or give them junk food when I turn my back. I get she's grandma and it's her house but they will be my kids. Plus spoiling them all the time won't do them any favors.

She's so nuts that yesterday she left the burner on the stove for nine hours and could of burned the house down.

I don't know what to do or say. I wish she would just respect my child rearing when I come and try to stay consistent when I say or do things instead of undermining me. Even the three year-old will purposely go to grandma because she always says yes to even the most ridiculous requests. What do I do?


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What Guys Said 1

  • You're right. She's wrong and crazy. Unfortunately it's her house. You and your fiance and the kids need to move out and find your own place.


What Girls Said 1

  • Damn, sounds like you have a situation on your hands. I just want to know where the fiance is in the picture? Does he discipline the kids? Are you willing to talk to him about it? Truth is, you're on grandma's territory and things probably are going to be ugly for a while. Honestly, there doesn't sound like much you can do except talk to your fiance. Option two--bare it and grin until you leave?