I'm very scared and nervous about my first time. Does it really hurt that much?

So I'm getting married next month and I'm starting to get very nervous and scared about this being my first time having sex. I know I love my fiance really much and he is very caring and sweet and loves me a lot, but even knowing that I can't stop thinking about if it's going to be painful for me :(

Can you give me some advice, or tell me by your experience if it hurts like hell?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, the pain level varies depending on the woman. For some women, it's totally painless. For others, it hurts quite a bit. For me, it was slightly uncomfortable but it wasn't very painful, although it wasn't until my third or fourth time that it started actually feeling good.

    My advice to you would be:
    -Relax. If you are tense, the walls of your vagina will be tense as well and it will be harder for him to enter you and and it won't be as comfortable for you.
    -Make sure you are well lubricated, lots of foreplay is important for this. If your natural lubricants aren't enough, you can always use lube too (but remember, if you plan on using condoms, make sure it is a water or silicone based lube so it won't break down the latex).
    -Communicate with your partner. Make sure he is gentle and understands that, since this is your first time, he should take it slow at first mans not try to rush everything. Take the time to do foreplay and then ease into the intercourse part.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Sex is a mechanism nature has designed to produce babies. That is the best way to keep human life everlasting on earth. Sex at right age with right person is a natural and normal thing. Nature has made it most enjoyable thing too. If it was painful and hurting - no man and woman would go for sex and producing babies. There are many miss-beliefs about sex and having babies - particularly about pain at first time and pain at the time of delivery. No animal feel pain during sex or giving birth to child. Why humans should fear about it? Just throw away all those thoughts and dream sweet for your new chapter of life. You are definitely going to enjoy all happiness. Best wishes for your happy and most enjoyable phase of life.

  • you are 30+ and still you haven't had sex? REALLY? i'm shocked!!!


What Girls Said 1

  • You waited such a long time?