Can someone older still be the one, would you marry with an age gap?

My boyfriend is 14 years older than me. I'm 23. He doesn't have kids. We both want marriage and a family. We have a lot in common like religious and cultural and education wise. He is the kindest most respectful guy I ever met. I've dated a lot of bad men and he's truly a good one. He's so amazing and I can't even believe I found him.

Married women told me that you just know when he's the one and there will probably be something different about him compared to the other guys you've dated. One woman told me her husband had the character she always wanted but a totally different look than she thought she would like.

For me it's his age. I was hesitant at first date but then everything else about him ended up being so amazing. And I feel in my heart that I can see my life with this man and I never knew that feeling before.

I know there will be age gap challenges. Am I crazy? It's not like he's 20 years older and there's no kids involved or any major immediate problems. I'm also not a kid anymore I am self sufficient and work and will be done with my graduate education very soon.

My friends try to make me feel bad like oh he just wants a young girl. But he treats me respectfully so far talks to me like I'm on the same level and he values my thoughts and opinions. Never acts patronizing to me.


Most Helpful Girl

  • My parents age gap is a little wider than yourrrelationship and they lasted.
    They got married almost 45 years ago and are still in love. I personally highly doubt I would ever be with a man so much older, and I think the majority are just disgusting old men preying on young girls, but there are definitely the rarer cases where it is just 2 people who are really compatible despite the age gap.
    I'm lucky my dad looks at least 20 years younger than his is though, people always think my parents are the same age. It's kind of embarrassing really, I don't really like people knowing my dad was some big old man who got with my young mum and stuff... Idk, that's just me though, and my mum was also younger than you when they met, so it's different.
    But yea, these relationshipstatus definitely can work. People might look at you funny in the street, or family and friends might try to convince you to find somebody your own age, but these are things that are easily worked through if you're both 100% in it.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Catherine and I were almost 25 years apart; when we met she was 21 and I was 45.
    We had a beautiful marriage filled with love.
    It terminated with her death in 2012. We almost made 25 years of marriage, 1988--2012. Actually, we married on February 14, 1988 (Aww... but there's a story behind that with nothing to do with Valentine's Day.)
    We "assumed" that I would die first. Vain assumption.
    Read my profile for more information and feel free to ask further questions.

  • I believe someone older can be the one. this girl I dated a while back, her parents are totally in love with each other and they are 10 years apart. still going strong! and have had many beautiful children

  • I honestly did not read the entire text. In general it can work out, the important questions are:
    - in what phase of your life are the two of you (like: puberty + retirement doesn't sound too good, does it?)
    - what mutual basis do you have (yours sounds good)
    - are you willing to work on it? Marriage is nothing that happens, it's something the couple constructs together in years of hard work - neverending (!!!) work.


What Girls Said 1

  • My husband and I are 12 years apart.. I'm 28 and he's 40.. I had several failed relationships and even failed marriage before him... I was hesitant bc of his age but we were friends and he was always my best friend and one day it hit me and we started dating and now he's adoptedmy two daughters and we are expecting another daughter in November he had no children before me but I can tell u age does not matter at all... If u kno u kno and true love is something u just kno...

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